Conference, November 3, 2018 Person of the Therapist

Saturday I was at a conference for the Ontario Association of Family Therapists. I have been with this group since I began as a student. As you know I also belong to the American Association of Family Therapists. To continue with my title of Registered Marriage and Family Therapists I need to belong to the Canadian Association of Registered Marriage and Family Therapists who have divorced from the American Association of Family Therapy. Are you confused yet? I am a clinical fellow. So, moving forward I will drop the Ontario Association of Family Therapists by not renewing next year. I informed one member of the board I was leaving because it can be very expensive belonging to all these associations. If you have caught up reading all my blogs, you would know that I dropped my title of Pastoral Counsellor, Specialist, for two reasons, but mainly one. The name of Pastoral Counsellor has changed and I cannot call myself a Psycho Spiritual therapist. It was causing too much confusion. I was mistaken for a spiritualist as in fortune tellers etc…..It was quite awful and though it may be working for people working in hospitals, it certainly was not working for me. I am not a fortune teller. I do not read minds. I do not consult with the dead, etc………..I am a Registered Psychotherapist in Ontario and am regulated. Many provinces are not regulated and be mindful of that if you assume we are all one and the same. The college exists to ensure that the public is protected. We are moving towards change and I am in agreement with that. I would like to see more consistency among all colleges without one being more difficult than the other, including the medical profession. I think we should all have a high standard of ethics without exception. I think that because we have an enormous responsibility to people who come into our care. So, I shall continue to be a clinical fellow with the Americans (AAMFT) I will be dropping Ontario (OAMFT) next year because it will no longer be relevant for me due to the changes and keeping in mind my budget. I will continue to be a member of the Canadian Association (CAMFT) because that will be required to maintain my status as RMFT. I will continue as an associate with CASC because I do not have the heart to drop them since I know so many people there. I can also keep up with what is happening in hospitals with chaplains. I was wondering why an email went out cautioning therapists not to refer to themselves as Registered Marriage and Family Therapists when they are not, but now I know it is because they have opened the doors to other practitioners who began referring to themselves as such. Catching on? It is important that you know if you are a therapist, what kind of therapist you are and it is also important for the public to know that they are seeing who they think they should be seeing. I see individuals, couples and families and am qualified to do so. My degrees and some certificates are on the wall. I have a drawer full of other certificates that if I put on the wall it would probably overwhelm people and it is not necessary. When I walk into an office and see only one day seminar certificates I pause. Now, some time ago there was a program indicating how much of a scam there is with people practising or teaching at colleges with degrees they purchased on line. I am so happy they got caught even though one teaching at a college was not fired. That I found very disturbing. Look up to see if the certificates or degrees exist. Dr John, may not be Dr John at all. Anyhow, the speaker of the conference is Dr Harry Apponte, HPhd, MSW, LCSW, LMFT, a family therapist, spirituality in therapy, etc…….He is presently a clinical associate professor in the Couple and Family therapy program of Drexel University in Philadelphia. I did not buy a book this time because it appears I learned what he was teaching in how to form a therapist. However, his book is “The Person of the Therapist Training model, Mastering of the Self, Edited by Harry J. Aponte and Karni Kissil. He reminded me of my own Supervisor, Dr Beech who ran the programs I studied in a very similar way. I have a degree of psychology from York University and a Masters of Ministry and Spirituality from Regis College at the University of Toronto. I also have another three years years of Pastoral Counselling from the Toronto School of Theology, University of Toronto, which I squeezed as much as I could in not to make it four years. It all cost me lots of money. Education is expensive however, don’t let that discourage you. In this time of age, it is more important than it was in the past. There are many who cannot proceed with an education. They have the funds but not the determination or ability and that is ok. Then there are others, who are brilliant but who do not have the funds or able to do so because they need to take care of their families. However, if you can and if it is only one course at a time do so. There are amazing professors out there and then there are others who enjoying watching students fail. As far as I am concerned they should not be teaching. They may have knowledge, but they may not have much compassion. I never heard of Dr Harry Aponte, but I could not help but like him. I believe he was born in Peurto Rica. He was raised in black Harlem. He was poor. As an intern he was assigned to go in a white, rich area where movie stars reign (my language; not his). He felt he had nothing in common and I heard some struggle in this but eventually he saw them as fellow humans. I learned that as a teenager taking swimming lessons. “Whom ever you see in distress, recognize in him a fellow man.” Dr Aponte talked about the importance of self knowledge and about transference and countertransference but not in those words necessarily. One woman who practiced for 54 years informed me that her clients have all been physicians. I remember another advertising for lawyers. I pondered over this specific selection of clients. How does one broaden their knowledge and range if who they see is so specific? Of course this means big bucks. How do we care for all? Also this is not quite ethical but if the fee is 400 hr a session, who else could afford it? I believe my education and training has been quite intensive. I charge a particular fee of 130. a fifty minute session. I went through a stage where I wanted to spend half a day with the poor at another location but as a white straight woman, my services have been rejected. As I mention this to some therapists, I am informed that I should understand. Of course I understand how my appearance which has served me well, will cause concern for certain groups, but is that not what self awareness is all about? When does personal biases and past history effect the best care and needs for your clients? It is so important to work on the personal affect because it can get in the way of being a good therapist. If emotions are being evoked of what a therapist is suffering, when with a client, can she or he, be fully present to their client? How much of that gets in the way for helping the client. There are enough services in Toronto for people who cannot afford to pay. They are always looking for clients as well, since they are funded. I know that now. Dr Aponte stated that therapists are not receiving the care that they need to become the best in the U.S.A, because of money. A woman in the audience states it is the same here. I wonder about her response. I think it is getting better here. Everyone is now regulated and if caught without being so is in trouble. That is a movement towards progress. As for quality of one who is qualified? I think we are doing ok. Therapists who are not qualified are being filtered out. There is no such thing as perfection. We are only human. I know that for the first five years or so, I so worried about causing harm. I am now confident as a therapist which can be very isolating. I have and have had a variety of clients from all walks of life, rich and poor, religious, spiritual and atheists, educated, non educated, people abused from partners either male, or female. Adults who were abused as children in ways that are not imaginable. People who were tortured and raped because of their religion and people who were tortured because of war. People who suffer grief, either through abortion, having a child killed or loss of a parent etc….. Living in Toronto, I have the opportunity and gift to serve all people regardless of religion, class, colour and race, opportunity and lack of. As a therapist I need to really know myself and to be focused on self care and ensure that my personal life is a healthy and happy one. That can take years for a therapist to achieve and if money is a problem and the forming of a therapist is not developed, than there can be a problem. I did enjoy Dr Aponte’s lecture. I think his students are lucky to have him as I was lucky to have all the mentors I have had such as Dr Beech who instructed me and supervised me and Fr Bill German, a Jesuit, who ensured I was on the straight and narrow. My own personal growth is as important to me as ever. In closing if you are a therapist, I hope this has helped. If you are looking for a therapist, I also hope this has helped. I have one more conference to go to, and I have a few plays to go see this month and a book selling and signing at York University (I only write for fun). This is a busy month working and having lots of fun. I shall keep you briefed. My next blog will probably be about the next conference I shall be attending shortly. Take care of yourself and know what your limits are and how much self care you need. Are you pleased with the life you are leading? Are you suffering? Why not take the time to make some needed changes in your life? Take time to go for a walk and be with nature. Read a book. Watch a movie. Listen to the laughter of children. What is triggered in you? What do you think?

Selling my books at York University, Showcase at Central Square , 13 Nov 18

It is my final signing and selling of my books for the year. I shall be at York University, Central Square, November 13, from 0830 to 3:00pm. I love going to this event each year. I shall be selling "Hey Guy Buy Me" "For Love of Country MIlitary Policewoman" and "The Internet Murders." Note that I also sell my own books on my personal web site (secure) at www.silvaredigonda.com You should also find all three of my books for sale at Squibb's one of the few local bookstores left in my beautiful city. You may find my ebooks at Indigo. Buying directly from me makes me happier. Ebooks are much cheaper on my own site since I get all the profits. Because my private practice comes first, I don't always give my hobby, the attention it needs but I love to think up stories and write them. I have done that my entire life. I have contemplated writing different books at the requests from different people. I thought about it carefully, but I am not quite ready to write about two old ladies solving crimes with humour as a friend of mine requested. Perhaps when I am older and can get into that mind set. It shall come. I loved Agatha Christie and have read all of her books. Miss Marple always amused and fascinated me, but Hercule Poirot - well he was my favourite. I have decided and began to write a scary book. Perhaps it is because it is Hallowe'en. Right now, I am clearing up paperwork and placing it on line for you to read while having a copy of it while destroying all the paper traces. My mother was my most loyal fan always encouraging me to write and edging me on to continue to write. It was she who one Christmas bought me several children like books and my disappointment was evident. I wanted fun stuff and books I did not think was fun. However, when I read my first book, it became a passion that we both shared. She would buy the books and I would read them. She read each day and that is how she educated herself. She was and still remains one of the most intelligent people I knew and without any formal education. However, she did read all my books from school until I went to university years later. I am going through my creative writing and picking out pieces I think I may use for this next book. I really don't waste anything. As I read some of my work, I throw it out because it no longer seems relevent to me at this point of my life or any good. However, some scary ones shall be collected and either used for print or to inspire me. I want to take my time with this one. I want to scare you or make you think, or both. I have a sibling who told me to make sure I do not scare myself. I do not know who I shall dedicate this book to but it will come to me. So, in the meantime, I shall lay down on the beach, my eyes closed, enhaling the morning salty air, to the sounds of sea gulls. Actually, I am at home on my lap top, waiting for the postman to come so I can give him his Hallowe'en treats in case I miss him tomorrow. Come visit me at York University. While there check out my books. I shall even sign them. Keep in mind that I am open to come visit book stores, clubs, schools, libraries etc....I really have a passion for this and plan to do it full time when I retire from my practice. P.S. I am going to have to put Holy Terror in my book somewhere because she is so cute. Awwww, postman came and got his chips and cheesies.

Hate - Heartfelt sorrow for the killing of the Jewish community in Pittsburg

I have seen hatred in most of my previous careers and I have seen the pain of suffering of victims and/or survivors in my private practice and in my internships. I have always felt a sort of kinship with the Jewish community. I went to a highschool where the majority were probably Jewish. I used to pretend to be Jewish to get their holidays so I could skip school on their day. However, I am a Roman Catholic and trying to get both holidays off was not missed on my teachers. So, I settled on getting my Christian holidays off. My sense of humour has served me well in my private life and careers. In the middle East I also worked in Tel Aviv and Eilat and saw the Jewish people as a proud people, an intelligent people. As an acquaintenace of mine who is Jewish said words to the effect that, the Jewish people need to be the best they can to survive. Hitler's objective to destroy the Jewish people horrified me as I learned about the camps in my Catholic elementary school. I could not believe even as a child that people could cause harm so horrendously to other human beings. As an adult touring several of the concentrations that killed and tortured so many caused tears to flow without even crying. Animals are more humane than ourselves, though we are considered the highest form. I was on a tour to Kenya with a group of Jewish people and I was stunned when at one resort, I was confronted by one, who stated that it must be horrible for me to be the only non Jew. I didn't know how he knew that, or understood, why I would be asked such a question. Hatred is ugly and we must all unite to do our part to stop ignoring this. I don't normally blog on a Sunday but I am making an exception today. I want the Jewish community who have always been so nice to me, know that I support them. I believe it was the Mayor of Pittsburg this morning stating that hatred needs to be eradicated throughout the world. I agree. I used to think we were so civilized but now I know we are behind. We are still on a path towards making this world worthy of us. So, know Pittsburg that today you are in my thoughts and prayers. Amen. I just received a call back from a friend who is a Jew. She sounded upset and told me that she had lit a candle for the Jews in Pittsburg who were killed and had no family. I had no idea that she had also lived in Pittsburg for awhile. I told her that she had given me an idea and I would light a candle for the Jewish people at mass today. The conversation was brief because she was suffering and needed to get off the phone. Such sadness but also the realization that there are so many good people out there who unite during these troubling times.

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder - continuation of psych notes (abnormal psychology)

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder Either obsessions or compulsions 1. recurrent and persistent thoughts, impulses or images that are experienced, at some time during the disturbance as intrusive, and inappropriate and that cause marked and inappropriate that can cause marked anxiety or distress. 2. The thoughts, impulses or images are not simply excessive. Worries about real life problems. 3. The person attempts to ignore or suppress such thoughts et…or nuetralize. 4. recognizes obsessional thoughts as product of his/her mind. 1. repetitive behavior - eg. handwashing or mental acts person feels driven to perform. 2. behavior or mental acts are amid at preventing /reducing distress are not connected in realistic way. B. person has recognized at some point unusual or excessive. C. takes more than one hour a day or interferes with normal routine. D. If other axis 1 disorder is present ok. not restudied to it eg. eating disorder, preoccupation with food - hair pulling etc…E. disorder not to the direct physiological effects of a substance eg. a drug of abuse/medication. Specify if poor insight. If for most of the time during, person does not recognize symptoms. Where prevalence - dissociates - women more than men. Two types of disorders - somatoform and dissociative disorder. What we see (counter intuitive) colours texture, shapes, etc… is seen from different areas of our brain. Different circuits process the different perceptions. Yet we are under the impression that it is one. Italian Neurologist- Intact left parietal lobe - point to Winnipeg from Toronto - pointed Winnipeg. Could not point left for Montreal because does not exist. Then turned around and point to Montreal. Could, but Toronto, no. Completely counter intuitive. Conscience has biological basis. It doesn’t work in typical intuitive way. We experience and we do not see this until it is disruptive. Part of brain isn’t there. We’re not conscious of it. Will give hypothesis at end to explain. Attention is far better to understand and has functioning localized to different sides of the brain. Can be split into different sides of brain. Can be split into different types of attention. Some arousal early theorist - eg. if awake, nervous system is arousal and no problem attending to stimuli. If asleep, can’t see this because too much noise in EEG. However, put into computer and average it. What happens if average it- all that stuff averages out to zero and left with invoked potential. If children born and suspected of being deaf can hook up to EEG and play sounds of different intensities and frequency. Child responds - not deaf. If hook to sleeping person almost identical. How people respond to signal when asleep depends. Sleeping baby - crying - mom hears. Dad hears but not really. Females have mechanism that discriminates. Daniel Shacter study with nurses sleeping in U.S.A. Small dorms for nurses to sleep- had tape recorder - played messages to them and day or two later remembered material much better. Attention - arousal - rem sleep >deep sleep>coma (cells actually set down). People used to of attention in arousal slate. Sustained attention - ability to keep focused on one thing for extended period of time. Distractibility Divided attention - measured when people are asked to do two tasks at once. I’ll give you three litres and one count backwards and then recite three letters again. What has this got to do with Somatoform Disorders? Seat - gravity - attention refocused. One thing happens in somatoform disorders. Psycholytical - pressures that are repressed, cause anxiety when surface entry - some energy breaks through - a conversion disorder - very little research support (at this time when I wrote these notes). Behavioral theory - re-enforced emitted what is re-enforced. Celia in the book blind - where grad, no longer re-enforcing. Facticious Disorder - symptoms produced for secondary gain. Attention, food, etc… Malingering - pretending to have disorder to obtain something - eg. faking sore neck from accident for money. Two ways to malinger 1. dumb - way out - 2. over all score/not individual. Will continue with Reporting of pain - 3 pain pathways

A Christian Theology of Judaism (Theology notes cont....)

I noticed it has been a long time (August) since I typed out my theology notes to you. So here I am continuing. I certainly cannot get bored. Trying to get this all out to you is a tad challenging at times. Theology is on my mind lately since my college is having a get together soon for us alumni. Fundraising is probably the objective but universitities have a way of wanting you to give back. I love the University of Toronto and I love York University. Both have helped me grow as part of the person I am now. If I were to give any of you some advice, it would be to try to get a formal education. I know that times are difficult for many and education is not always possible, but try even if it is one course at a time. Knowledge is so rewarding and gives you a place in the world to better understand it. As you know, but maybe not, in case some of you are just starting to read my notes, I write out all notes by hand rather than type it. Studies have also demonstrated a better retention when you do so rather than typing. However, to rid myself of all extra stuff I don't really want, I type it all so I still have my notes, but I can clear all physical trace of it from drawers and shelves. I also write for fun and I have finally decided what I shall write in my next book. It will be a book about horror with a theological twist. I have written three books to date and each of a different genre. I love book fairs and talking to people. When someone returns to tell me they have enjoyed a book I have written, I get all warm and fuzzy. Not so much when one returns to tell me how horrible they thought any of my books are. The most controversl one is "Hey Guy Buy Me". That one also drew a negative response by one of my profs. Oh well, you cannot please everyone, all the time, nor do I try. I write for pleasure mostly and it gives me satisfaction. I have been doing so since I was a child and my mom was my most devoted mentor and fan. I do hope you enjoy reading my blogs. Thank you for doing so. www.silvaredigonda.com A Christian Theology of Judaism Revelation from God. Authors of New Testament - according to Hebrew Testament - does not replace the Old Testament revelation. Therefore 1. Reading Hebrew scriptures. 2.* Romans, Chapter 11, vs 25-32, vs-26 - all Israel will be saved. This means that not only those Jews but all Jews will enjoy the fulness of God’s mercy, regardless of their belief. Israel will be part of the restitution and will deal with Israel and others as per his mercy. 3. New Testament teaches all Israel will be saved. 4. Live between times - between the already and not yet - Protestants - between promises of fulfillment. 5. If state of Israel is theologically acknowledged then revelation is continued through covert of Jews. Protestants may have problem with; Roman Catholics not. The theological significance of the State of Israel through Jewish entered. No dis. between nation/religion. In this view then Torah is law to run the gov’t and how to cook. Kingdom of God is closely connected to the trump of Israel is the land of Israel. Salvation will come through the Jews. They don’t want any piece of land. They want Israel because it was promised. For Jews Israel is the holy land. Next regarding theology is theological differences between two religions. Jewish/Christian dialogue.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder - notes from undergrad abnormal psychology

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder A person exposed to a traumatic event in which both of the following are present: 1. Person experienced, witnessed or was confronted with event/s that involved actual or threatened death or serious injury, or a threat to the physical integrity of self or others. 2. the person’s response involved intense fear, helplessness or horror. Note: children - may be expressed instead by disorganized or agitated behavior. B. Traumatic event is persistently re-experienced in 1 or more: 1. recurrent and intrusive distressing recollections of the event including images, thoughts or perceptions. Children - repetitive play may occur in which themes or aspect of trauma are expressed. 2. recurrent distressing dreams of the event. Children - frightening dreams without recognizable events. 3. Acting or feeling as event recurring. Sense of reliving, illusions, hallucinations and dissociative flashback episodes including those that occur in awakening or when intoricaled. sp. Children - re-enactment may occur. 4. Intense psychological distress or exposure to internal cues that symbolize or resemble an aspect of the traumatic event. 5. Psychological reactivity or exposure to internal or external cues that symbolize or resemble aspect of threat. C. Persistent avoidance of stimuli associated with the traumatic and numbing of general responsiveness (not present prior to trauma) by 3 or more of the following: 1. efforts to avoid thoughts, feelings or conversions associated with trauma. 2. efforts to avoid activities, places, people that arouse recollections 3. inability to recall an important aspect of the trauma. 4. marked interest/participation of significant activities. 5. feelings of detachment/estrangement from others. 6. restricted range of affect (unable to have loving feelings). 7. sense of foreshortened future. eg. does not expect career, marriage, kids or normal life span. D. Persistent symptoms of increased arousal (not prior to trauma) by 2 or more of following: difficulty of falling/staying asleep. irritability or outbursts of anger. difficulty concentrating. hypervigilance exaggerated startled response. E. Duration of the disturbance (symptoms of criteria B, C, & D.) is more than one month. F. Disturbance causes clinical sign., distress, or impairments ……acute if symptoms less than three months. Chronic - duration of less than three months or more. with delayed onset - if onset of symptoms is at least six months after the stressor. Eg. (Film) Patient - Vietnam works 15 to 16 hrs daily. Picked up for impaired driving. Refused breathalyzer. He is crying and says he does not care. Rest of the time is crying. Issue: reason why not breath sample? His story. His mother and he were in prison camps. People were routinely shot, beaten. Eventually escaped by boat and was at sea for seven days. Refugees - uniform - is one that brings back all these experiences. Failed all criteria. A reminder to not diagnose yourself or others. Pre- changes of DSM. Next for notes on Abnormal psychology is Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

Vietnam eating dogs is bad for image tid bit news & chronic food deprivation world wide

Today is a day of paperwork, more paperwork and some other housekeeping stuff. This was in my paperwork to let you know something I thought was interesting, sad and humourous, depending on what you are reading. It came from CP 24 news which I watch and read at the same time. This was scrolled, I believe after 10 Sep. "Authorities in Vietnam's capital are urging residents to stop eating dog meat because it hurts the city's image." What image you say? No comment. "UN report says the number of people facing chronic food deprivation globally increased to 821 million in 2017." Shameful I say. It is time to really start tapping into our humanity and thinking clearly when we vote. Let's ensure we feed all people and ensure that the money does not get into the hands of tyrants and dictators.