Catholic Register - June 21, 2026 - Men struggling with Mental Health (p6)

 The National Survey of 2000 men, conducted in April 2025 by CMHC and Intensions Consulting depicted that as many as 64% of men reported having moderate to high levels of stress, 50% were at risk of social isolation and 67% reported never seeking out a professional mental health service.  In Canada men account for nearly 75% of suicide deaths.  The Government of Canada's Health Infobase states that every day, 10 men take their lives = 3,560 days per year with suicide among men occurring at three times the rate of women.

     I have recommended that men during therapy also join a men's group and some have complained that all it was doing was bashing women.   Be careful with which group you join, sometimes there is an agenda of hate.  That is not what you want.  Also, make sure that the therapist you find is registered.  

      What do you think?

Legion celebrates 100 years and of Course I am always ready for a celebration

 

What you see here is a photo of the missing Veteran.   I appreciated my gift bag which included poppy earings.  I don't have holes in my ears so I will have to find someone who can convert them to clip on.   I shall enjoy wearing them.  Who you see here in pink is Francis Nunciata, and of course I was excited to see her because she used to be Mayor in the City of York and is a councellor for the City of Toronto.  I believe she has been in elected office since 1988.  I used to read the Sun faithfully for years and she was in it often because of her work.   What struck me the most about this icon is how she stood up to city politicians and one pushing her on the stairs.  This is what women had to endure and she didn't tolerate it.   I remember a city counsellor telling me something about her which I didn't believe and so I called her and it wasn't.  How low can people get.   He is no longer in politics.  So, when I saw her, I couldn't help getting excited because I don't get to meet too many icons I respect.  Of course I went up to her to meet her.  I told her about the stairs incident that exploded the papers at the time.  She left before she could eat dessert because there was a fire at a building and she wanted to be there in case residents needed anything - an exellent role moded.  It was a fun night. 

Global Warming anyone? Toronto hit with a heat wave and most polluted in the world for a few days - bringing you up to date

      My city is cooking up a storm.    Air conditioning was something of a luxury in the past but not anymore.   I consider myself fortunate.   We also have fires in the wooded areas and why not?  That is what happens.  I do sit outside in the early morning and sometimes late afternoon, but yesterday I felt I was walking into a sauna and came right back in.   It is not keeping me from socializing but of course everything is being moved indoors, but that is ok.  We had a rough winter and summer has just started.  We should be cooling off this weekend with storms in the forecast.

     So, let's forget the weather for a bit.   I have been doing a lot of thinking and very little work.  Am I becoming lazy?  Am I adjusting to retirement and a new career?  Am I procrastinating?  Who knows and who cares?  This is where I am at.  I am still watching the real estate.  Apparently prices went down 2% in my city from last year.  Detached houses are becoming more attractive now (once again) than attached.  This of course keeps changing or at least the information does.  I still get annoying calls from agents I don't want to deal with and just block them.  One I threatened to go to the realestate board and he hasn't bothered me since.  With 10,000 agents looking for work, you can imagine.   I am going to be more careful this time around since two pieces of my art work disappeared last year.  I want someone who is honest and experienced and am in no rush.  Honesty can be difficult.  I have heard of pushy agents and that is certainly not for me.  So that is where I am at in real estate.  

     I have new neighbours I haven't  met  but I have so many good neighbours that I feel I am on a roll.  

     During one of the writing lectures a fellow Toronto writer shared that she uses Substack and it looks like I may be going in that direction for some income in my writing.  If I am going to transition from hobby to professional seriously, than I should make some changes.  I have many of you who read what I write.  Theology notes has decreased in interest.  Psychology notes is popular; my thoughts and travels are most popular at the moment.   I want you to think about if you would be willing to pay $10.00 a month to join me in Substack.  I would keep theology notes here and will have to still decide what I can offer you that you would pay $10.00 a month.   I have put my latest book in pause again because of all the transitions and because I want to have fun.  This book is about the Protagonist, a psyhotherapist, getting involved in murders without realizing it.   I throw in some sessions with people and I kill a few people.   There is a love interest for the therapist but she doesn't realize it yet.   Her assistant is a gay man that has generated interest in how I portray him.   I have decided to just do my thing.  I cannot please everyone but do need to please myself.  Everyone has an opinion, but I am writing this book and I shall decide.  Normally when I write, I throw myself into it but this time,  I am reading a lot for pleasure that I am neglecting my own writing of my next book.  As you can see, I am taking my time with everything.   But, there is a method to my madness.  I want to do everything right for me and there are so many options.  Because of the endless options,  I am exploring,

     So, for now, think about joining me at Substack.  I think I can ease myself into it after I figure out what I will provide there for you and eliminate here.  I have been here forever and think I received a 15.00 cheque once.  They advertise a lot and well I am beginning to feel used.  You ever think that?  With Substack they get 10% of whatever I may or may not make.  Since I love writing to you I think it is about time that I stop letting others make all the money and share a bit of it.  This is transition........What do you think?  Please feel free to share your thoughts.

Weekend full of Bullets in our City - Salsa Festival mourns

      I have probably been to every festival in Toronto except the Danforth.   I am not talking about the burbs but just in Toronto.  I used to frequent the Danforth and enjoyed dining there so I didn't feel compelled to go to the festival swarming with crowds.  I grew up in Toronto and it was the best and it was relatively safe.  The Toronto I grew up in and the Toronto now is completely different.  We didn't have all this violence and guns and gangs.  Oh we had the biker gangs but they didn't normally bother the public in general.  What we have now is children and I mean children, not teens harassing grown ups.  I don't know how many complaints I have heard of a grown up looking at a group of children and being told where to go with a look of hatred on them that scares the adult.  A few more years later, they join bigger gangs and shoot each other without any regard of the public around them.  The justice system has become a revolving door with no consequences to meet the seriousness of the offence.  Saturday night there was a targeted shooting and two people lost their lives.  Innocent bystanders were shot.  There was a stampede of  people trying to escape.  This is what my city has become.  It is in my opinion dangerous.   Many people raised in Toronto have left the city to live elsewhere.  I intend to as well but the economy has prevented me from doing so.  It doesn't really cause a dent, because people want to live here.  It is a beautiful city and I shall always love it, because it is my home town.  I can get whatever I want here.   Toronto used to be safe, but it isn't anymore, regardless of what people say.   We do need changes to corresspond with the current atmosphere.  We can't have laws that have outdated the goodness Canada used to have.   If there are no serious consequences to match the crimes committed than we are fuelling an atmosphere for corruption to grow like weeds out of control.    I usually go to festivals by noon when the bad boys are in bed and leave by supper time.  The Salsa Festival I have been to only once because when I went the music was much too loud for me and I don't really love Salsa music or dance to it.   Anyhow,  I do feel bad for all those who have been tramatized and injured.  You take care of yourselves where ever you live.  What do you think?  

Theology notes continues

 The wilderness becomes the land of the exile.  The Torah is mentioned in Deuteronomy.   Torah means to instruct.  In Deuteronomy, the Torah becomes the law.

Genesis, Exodus 

     What are they doing?  What is their proposal? - in light of past covenants.  Notice what they do in Genesis 1, Exodus and Noah's covenant.  The Deuteronians are not naive.  There is a continual renewal of covenant.  You are provoked, whether in the land or not.  Choose life - by remembering the past, look into the future.  Both time lines are provoking for a decision.

God's Irresistable love   -----------------------------------future crises

                                                   Moment of Decision

Israel's Incomprehensible

faithlessness

                                                     Future blessings

                           

Narrative History                                                                          Covenant

Interplay of remembering and not forgetting

 to be continued.

A Day in Elora for R&R

I know I have been to Elora before, but I can't recall if it was with family or friends.   That is how long it has been.  We began with a tour by a retired Geography teacher  who reminded me of how painful high school could be.  I had guessed he had been a teacher and he eyed me like some of my high school teachers used to.   I loved University but never usually cared for the high school teachers (my bad).   After about an hour and a half my brain went into overload.  Anyhow,  he was a very nice man and full of knowledge because he has lived there since the 60's and saw what has grown fairly big since his arrival to a population of  2000.    Elora and Fergus connected as did the politicians and now there is some division with regards to politicians.  One of my courses in undergrad was Psychology of Education.  It emphasized the importance of working as a team.   Perhaps every politician should take that course and learn how to work together for the sake of better results for all.  There are quite a few Churches in both towns which I don't think I have noticed so much in other places or it may be because  I don't usually tour each one with a teacher.     Unfortunately,  my telephone battery expired, colpa mia for not charging it before I left.   I did manage to get a few photos of the Gorge for you.   We also toured the residential streets with a bit of history there for us, which I won't over burden you with.  I learned that the politicians wanted to make money with parking and so they got that all sorted, however,  what happened when someone paid for parking, they would get pornographic photos.  Yup, the money never went to the towns.  They apparently are not getting paid yet.  He also spoke of coming during the week because there is hardly  sufficient parking during the weekend.  He also went on about visiting tourists bringing their dogs who don't like the town dogs and vice versa.  See what I mean?  There was a lot more but I'll stop now, before I faint.

My highlight aside from the Gorge where you can rent a tube for the day to explore the rabids.  (I am not going to bore you with the details) I will tell you that you have to be able to walk a mile and a half both ways to and from the park to qualify).  If you are interested you my contact the Elora Conservation Park.  Everything was broken down for us. 

      I usually like to visit the bakeries when I visit towns, so I went into the Elora Bakery and bought some scones at $4.50 each.  I also bought  sour dough, their speciality.  However the sour bread wasn't cut and this morning, I gave up after half way and just tore off chunks and threw it all in the freezer.   I also had difficulty cutting some other bread so that won't happen again.   I'll stick to scones.  Apparently they don't have a slicer.  I just assumed.  You know the saying.   I had a scone for lunch and that was right up there with the best scones I've had here in Toronto.    

     We ate at the Country Kitchen next door to MacDonald's.   I ordered vegetarian stir fry which reminded me of the Thai I ate on the cruise (I know,  I still owe you more on that).   I am not into sweet main foods prefering hot and spicy, however,  every one I was with, loved the food.  

     What impressed me the most and I would recommend, aside from the Gorge is a visit to Elora Distilling Co.   We had a tour of the premises which is quite small but very effective.  This is where I felt the town atmosphere in their way of bartering with the farmers and their efficient small scale distillery.  I support small businesses and this is a place to go and buy.  They are located at 102-4 Metcalfe Street,  Elora.  NOB 1SO.  Their web site is  www.eloradistillingcompany.com

Have a nice weekend.  

  

AAMFT Conference - Notes……Continue - Adult Attachment: Developing Secure Attachments.

 Dismissing Attachment

Unresolved

Deep fear of relationships.    Sees relationships as dangerous where ever they can be (distant parents.  He didn't even know the names of his three children).   Angry parent, detachment, abusive. 

Intimate relationships can be dangerous for them as they see it.  Difficulty sleeping, concentrating, difficulty in sex relationships.  In more extreme cases dissociate and may not recall events or their whereabouts.

FOCUS OF THERAPY

     1.  Creating a secure base in therapy. 

     2.  Memories of early childhood are recalled and explored.

     3.   Exploration of current relationships.

     4.   The therapeutic relationship.

     5.  Mourning loss.

     6.  Loss of self.

     7.  Mindful acceptance of the limits of one's attachment.  Externalizing change.

     8.  Risking change in every day life.

     9.  Termination.

Goal of Therapy

     Gain awareness of and express feelings and needs.

     Develop greater capacity for intimacy.

Preoccupied Clients:

- to develop autonomy.

-to develop affect regulation with the capacity to express needs, wants and feeling in a regulated manner.