In the Christmas Spirit - A reflection of the past year and wishing you the best of the holiday season

I have been singing everyday since I have been on vacation. I have one pet “Holy Terror” the star of my two books (one is still incomplete) who hates it when I sing. She even howls for me to stop. My other pet, “Mr Attitude” loves it. He comes running, wants me to hold him and dance as I sing away. My mom used to ask me to sing with her every Christmas whether I was in the mood or not. She would have me sit with her by the fake fire place and sing along to her favourite song, “Silent Night”. Tonight on the tube they are focusing on that song and so I shall watch it for her. Christmas day I have memories of exploring the unknown with my mom. She had the same sense of adventure and throughout the year we would drive and explore the country. Day trips were lots of fun. We spent time with the entire family and I also got away to spend time with friends. Last year several close friends, including a neighbour died. This year I recently lost another close friend of mine due to the complications of COVID 19. However, with all the loss in recent years I have so much joy in my soul. I believe in God and I believe that we move on to heaven or purgatory and I won’t even mention the other hot spot. I think of it as a caterpillar turning into a beautiful butterfly. There are so many mysteries we do not understand. This has been a busy year for me. I have dealt with much suffering from the people I care for in my practice. Because of that I have focused much on my self care. I don’t normally take this much time off at Christmas but COVID has increased the suffering of so many. It has compounded suffering. What has been consistent is the echo of shame and guilt but what has also been consistent is the voice of hope. There are many who have lost their careers and with it their sense of identity. They are grieving but with that some have shown such resiliency in searching for jobs to sustain them during this pandemic. There has been more difficulty with partners and families with polarized views of the pandemic and more disturbances as families have to spend more time together. This Christmas if I may make a suggestion is to focus on what you have. This may be a time to explore what you actually enjoy in life. Try a hobby, try music, try writing, try finding something that moves you. I know that I can live in a castle and I can have the same enjoyment living in a cabin. I love nature and spend a bit of my day looking outside at my trees, birds and squirrels. I spend a bit of each day in prayer, reflection and reading. I love life. I am adjusting to social distancing and have actually in this second wave closed down shop and have done all therapy on-line. I am aware that people do not all social distance or wear masks and may not be honest in revealing this. Safety always needs to be the first consideration. Who knew that my entire practice would be virtual or via telephone. This has also been a time to reflect regarding my future. I would like to spend one year travelling. I can take a Sabbatical and continue working part time while travelling. After all what I need is a computer and a secure site. I just need to check with my college. Of course with my pets it is not possible, however soon they will be both 18 years old. I don’t want any changes for them that will cause stress. They have brought me many years of joy and I intend to care for them properly. I like seeing them happy. They make me laugh each day. I am aware that I have many choices. Which road should I take? The one I wish to take at the moment. In my practice I try to help people achieve their own goals whatever they may want. Sometimes, they don’t know what that looks like. Sometimes they do not know who they are because people have always told them who they are and forced them to be what they wanted for themselves. Why not this Christmas make a decision for what it is you really want for yourself? Whatever, your religious belief is try to think of it has a positive. I hear so much of a punishing God. Think of God has a loving God. What would that look like? Try some soul searching. It is difficult to make choices when feeling overwhelmed and that is the time to step back and refocus. It has also been a year where I have been alerted of some support groups which may be representing themselves. Do your homework and if something doesn’t feel right move on. Dial 211 to find help in determining what you are looking for in mental health. People need to be ready to get help for themselves. Families suffer when there is addiction or mental illness within family members. We need to find happiness and joy in our own lives. This Christmas I wish you and your families a wonderful holiday and positive experience. Look into your soul within your search and not what you own. The best of you is within yourself. Merry Christmas. Silva (http//: silvaredigonda.ca redigondapsychotherapy.com

VACATION VACATION VACATION - Why not buy one of my books for the Holidays - Ask for a signed copy

Wow, it feels great to be on vacation. I wasn't even going to read my emails, but then I remembered that I sell my books and how am I going to sell them if I don't check out who wants one? So, I am glad that I did today. Also, I don't want to return to work and find that I need to spend a week reading all the emails so I am glad that I managed to get on today. However, I am not booking any courses or planning anything that requires me to use my calender. I want to get back to writing my book and stay in the mindset. I will begin tomorrow. If I can write a bit everyday I will be quite pleased. I should start cutting and pasting some for you here as well. Why not. Maybe that will motivate you. I am now with shopify and you can find me at silvaredigonda.ca. I can deliver world wide so there is no excuse if you live in Timbucktoo. I have done all my Christmas shopping and deliveries and so I am good to go. I have been watching Christmas movies til I was able to memorize the format. I actually went grocery shopping and never thought that going shopping for food could be such an event. That my car made it there and back only enhanced my joy. I cannot wait for the vaccine to be available to me and return to things being more normal. For now, I am concluding my day. I will talk to you more often and try a sales pitch. If you have bought all my books, I thank you. If not let your fingers do the walking. Awwwwwww, did I mention I love vacations????? ">

Conquest Joshua 1-6, 24, Joshua 24 and Judges - Theology notes continues

Historical Prolouge Vassel - Subordinate group of people Sovereign - wants to illicit a commitment from the vassel. Look at all the benefits. Look at how there is freedom. Look at benefits received. Positive reasons why should be engaged. What are the stipulations after receiving gifts? Vassels return fugitive slaves. If you are going to be faithful, you must return, another don’t remove markers, paying taxes; oath making promise is made and you have witness. Blessings and curses are associated with it. Some kind of ritual for curses, consumed blessing and curse so when fulfilled treaty - body could carry blessing or curse, body would carry curse. Let me be torn like this broken animal if not kept. We have people of Israel and God being bonded. Priestly - forever - difference is lack of curses. Vassel Treaties - no mediators. Be aware of what is unique in the story. Two rituals - 1. Blood 2. Sacrificial meal (both Sinai Covenant). A vassel never embedded a social God. Is embedded to obey his laws. Joshua and Judges Conquest - Infiltration - Revolt in between period of Sinai Covenant and the question behind this. What is the manner Israel came to have this bond? It is hard to ascertain for there be a lot of from the group of being left behind. We don’t have that. We’re in a period of time. How did Israel come into the land? Conquest- Infiltration - revold. Joshua - linear narrative, shows Joshua receives leadership from Moses. The image of conquest is highlighted in the book of Joshua. Integration - local people joined this group as Israelites. Not too much evidence of revolt. There are three manners of possessing the land. Story of Rahm - spies protected by women. Crossing of Jordon River - begins but not completed. (Richard Hess is a good article to read) (Dever William - Archeology of that time). Deuteronomy - Moses is sent out and spies to check the land - it was good - they had to be purified - Joshua again spies. Killed because polluted the land (with idolatry and injustice). Prime evil justice in Genesis. Motif of wrath of Joshua. To be continue

Domestic Abuse

I have another week to go and then I am taking holidays and back to work 5 Jan 20. I will still be writing but writing in the Christmas Spirit or holiday spirit. I am taking a break from psychotherapy. But today I want to continue with the Conference I attended and will probably add tidbits from other sources. I want to talk about Domestic Violence. Severe violence happens to one in four women. One in seven are men. Severe violence is being struck with a fist, beaten, slammed against. There is physical violence, sexual - forcing sex. Abuse is also emotional - harming self worth or emotional well-being - domination, degradation, constant criticism, continual blaming, isolation, economical (Financial ) control, property damage, jealousy etc… Theoretical - holding sexist attitudes, seeing or being a victim of violence as a child - Having insecure attachment platforms - Not having a job or other events that cause stress. Secondary violence - using drugs or alcohol esp. drinking heavily. Depression and Trauma. Q+A: Usually hit in the face. Couple Therapy - negotiation. Determining if couple therapy is safe/possible. Dr Gunnur Karakurt, Phd. Reporting Issue: not sure of exact number of male victims. Not many seminars for men. They go to Emergency. May not be believed by Police. Few studies - emotional abuse. Male victims did not report separately. Not known what treatment is available for men. So far not really out there, maybe one or two. Health Correlates of Violence: Victims/survivors - PTSD, Depression, Anxiety, substance abuse. Treatment: Domestic violence shelters/educational program supporting victims/survivors. Group therapy: High drop out rate unintentional consequences, evidence minimal on the effectiveness of these interventions. Treatment is focusing on the whole person by improving mental health issues, safety and support. My input. I still owe you about domestic abuse which will eventually come. It is true that there is a focus on battered women and much less of men being abused. As a therapist, I too have been chastised for having an interest in protecting men. However, I have worked with men all my life in an environment that was mostly men and though I have met men who I have little use for even outside of work, whom I have tolerated because they were married to people I like, they have been the minority. I have had wonderful friends who are men and wonderful mentors who are men, mainly because my interests were careers traditionally chosen by men. Times are changing. I have provided psychotherapy for both women and men who have been abused from childhood times to the present. For women who have had different level of abuse from their partners report that psychological abuse was worse than the physical abuse they sustained. They lose their self worth and self esteem and we work to have them regain a truer sense of self. Beautiful women think they are ugly because they have been told so many times. Imagine having life start with sexual abuse as a mere child and have it continue to adult hood with various partners. Can you break the cycle? Yes, but it takes time. There is much to talk about this topic. But not today. Talk soon.

The pandemic, virtual practice education and what do you think?

Time is just flying. I completed one hour with the CRPO regarding How to Expect the Unexpected in on line practice. This is becoming old hat for me since my entire practice has moved on line with a few exceptions, preferring in person is not one of them, during this second wave. I make exceptions for emergency response persons, domestic abuse etc…..At the beginning it was a mad dash to learn everything about this pandemic and on line therapy. I have opened myself to provide help to those living in remote areas etc…..So, though I shall continue to accept invites for tele-health or other terms for on line therapy, it is not with the same starvation. I can dwindle what I think may be repetitive. One thing not mentioned today but was mentioned with the AAMFT conference was to be mindful of spyware from the perps on the computers of their victims/survivors. I do want to mention a few things from an hour talk on 29 Sep 20, York Circle COVID 19 and the Environment, Behaviour Policy Implications for Sustainability. The talk was from Dr Mark Winfield, Faculty of Environmental and Urban Change. Does anyone actually think of benefits from COVID? Dr Winfield stated that there has been a 15% to 20% global reduction of emissions, air quality improvements. There is a vulnerability of global supply chains - no domestic availability. We did have manufacturing abilities. Gov’t responses - two discoveries - a return to normal vs building back better. Exodus from urban core to suburbs and exurbia. Is this temporary or a long term trend? There was an 80% reduction of TTC (I haven’t taken the TTC during the pandemic even though my car is dying). Regarding the European union - moving investments into climate change. This was an opportunity to move forward in this pandemic. There was a dismantling of any protection by this provincial government for the environment here which was put in place during 1975 - all dismantled. I found this so disappointing. Remember when I wrote that global warming is more abstract than this pandemic? Keep that in mind. I am so looking forward to the vaccine. I am not a recluse but have been living like one trying to protect mine and me. I would like you to take a moment and think about how the Pandemic has changed you? Have you been reflecting about things that you disregarded before? Have you changed because of it? I want to wish you my best. Take care and if you want to read one of my fluff books you can order at http://www.silvaredigonda.ca Take care.

York Circle - COVID 19 Vaccine: Production, Policy, Politics

The speakers were Dr Harris Ali, Dr Gillian Wu, Dr Vivian Sarikakis and Dr A.M. Viens. These are my notes. We are eight months into the pandemic. Dr Sarikakis began with the questions…What is a gene? What is a protein? Ability of a cell to carry out its function. SARS-COV-2 was identified a year ago from a patient in China. We had SARS-COV BJO1 form before (bats) and another from the Middle East. What is it? It looks like spikes - red - on the crown of the virus and the grey portion is important that by washing with soap and water, this destroys the envelope, thus the virus. Basically, a key to unlock the host and therefore enters the hosts cell. After vaccination - antibodies should stop the key to open it up and infect the cells. SARS-COV-2 life cycle - 1. Entry - recognition between spike and ACE2 receptor proteins. 2. Replication: RNA genome is released in cell which generates copies. 3. Release - new virus is released. Can inject adjacent cells. (There was more details regarding are therapeutics may be used. You can find how this all works regarding cells and immunity in my earlier blogs so I won’t be repeating this. Dr Wu reported 1. Viral RNA detected in the back of the nose. Lab performs the test which takes time. She described how testing is done and how it has evolved to shorter time. There are three vaccines right now which is big - has to enable the spike protein to the person’s immune system therefore activating the immune system. (again read my earlier blogs for elaboration. We were being typed live on facebook but I couldn’t find it today for you to watch. I do recommend you watch this once it is back on the internet (York University - titled as per my caption). Dr Wu talked about the vaccines still needing approval, however, she will take whatever is first approved. Dr Harris Ali, Dept of Sociology talked about misinformation about the pandemic and vaccines. - misinformation, fake news, conspiracy theories etc…The vaccine hesitancy is party of the social environment - consideration of politics, anti vaccine campaigns, misinformation (unintentionally misleading) and disinformation (intentionally misleading). In recent studies in the US, it was revealed that 35% of Americans might not want to get COVID vaccines. Mis/Disinformation may fuel conspiracy theories. The objective is breaking the connection between the agent and the host. That is what washing with soap and water is all about. Anti vaccination social media accounts with COVID 19 conspiracy narrative has grown by 19% in follower account during this time. People are busy and so rely on shortcuts, often looking for consistency with their own attitudes. People will sometimes disregard additional fact checking that contradicts their political beliefs. Dr Ali spoke of his involvement with Ebola in Africa. People denied Eboli until their loved ones died. Global warming is more abstract. We need to be able to stay safe longer with controlled measures when the vaccine is being distributed. Dr Viens spoke of the population of Ontario having almost 15 million people. Question asked? Who will get the vaccine first? There was some discussion regarding distribution principals for scare resources. Ethical questions came into play. It was reported that Aboriginals have ten years less life expectancy. Other potential relevant factors. How long will the vaccine last? More than one dose? An international concern is required. Panel spoke that normally 10-15 years is required to produce a vaccine. HIV - 40 years and still no vaccine. In Canada we maintain working as a country and not individual. We are kind in compared to some countries. The potential to improve society with kindness, to improve society and not just our health. Factors such as where we live, the structure etc…goes beyond self care. There was a question period and my question was asked first from the panel, my first name is clear (last not so much). I had concerns because of what I heard from the news (misinformed unintentionally). Answer: The testing was double blind. Patients are reporting. It is transparent. 44,000 people have been tested. It has been peer reviewed. There has been sharing of information. Everyone has been working together. Lots of money has been donated for this research. 2003 SARS inf. Corona Virus has agents of SARS. Around the world, putting aside differences and real time connection - unprecedented at that time. We are working more together nowadays (than 20 years ago). We are evolving for the future. Another question - Is a refusal of 35% referring to the vaccine affecting the rest of us? We have no data yet, because there is no vaccine as yet. If there is a children’s party and one is infected - all will get it. This is a human right? Question: Does Canada have the experience to provide vaccine to the entire population? Response: Urban yes. Worry is those who are marginalized and remote communities (aboriginals). Canada is a cold climate. Other countries don’t have the capacity for freezers to accommodate billions of doses of vaccines. Dr Harris begins talking about Africa and electricity problems (I watched a documentary about this and it is problematic). Question: Frequency of testing vaccine? We know for now that it is five months effective. Mutation in the virus changes. Vaccine is required for that change. We are still vaccinated by the 1918 virus. It has changed and we are still vaccinated each year. This lecture was live on facebook however I could not find the link so decided to share my notes with you. I have another about the pandemic from York University that I attended a while ago but it is still relevant. I will get that for you next week. I have also attended a two hour session with our college and will attended another two hours. I cannot share that with you. There are times I am not able to share and that is ok. So please, keep safe. I will not be proof reading this so any errors are mine alone. I have also had to turn down some interesting events simply because of restricted time.

The family Body Project: Family - level Prevention of Eating Disorders (notes)

As promised last week this will include my notes from the American Association of Family Therapy I attended. This included one hour of education hours. It was indicated that 13% of young women globally met DSM-5 disorder. Prevention is vital because 80% never receive treatment. Risk Factors: 1. number of hypocoloric diets and having childhood abuse 2. body dissatisfaction. 3. cultures that emphasize thinness. 4. Family pressure to be thin. Protective Factors in family content: 1. adaptability and cohesion - ability to change; communicate. 2. Family Meals. 3. Emotional safety/attunement. Able to express emotional needs. Body Project is an eating disorder program proven to be a most effective program for teens and young adults identified as female. Family based treatment is more effective, so developed this project, from thin - to fit. Increase culture for body acceptance; family connection and communication. Decrease risk factors - thin ideals, body dissatisfaction dieting - the ideal body dissatisfaction dieting and negative affect - Disorder Eating Symptoms. For further information you may look up the project. They involve one parent in this approach. With my previous studies eating disorders were also about control. Some people feel they have no control over their lives but thee can dictate what they eat and when. Record what you eat and when. Take this time to work on yourself. Are you ready to make changes in your life? What do you think?