Writer's Corner

   

  In one Sisters of Crime, webinar, I learned that three in 100 finish their novel.  We were informed of the three p’s.  Planning, Professionalism and Patience.  It was suggested that we self reflect each day.  Do I plan?  I have been writing since I was a child so no.  I don’t plan it.  I just do.  Professionalism -  Most of my work if not all has been Professional so yes, a shadow of my professionalism since I write for fun to date and it is my down time.   Patience - nada.  Each year when I go to Confession, I don’t have to worry about what I will report to the Priest (which is coming up by the way.  I can’t remember if I went last year or if I was sick?  Probably the year before, because I could barley walk then).  I tell the Priest that I have no  patience and that will have some give me a little penance and others give me lots (for the same sin - really?)  How big a deal is it having no patience?  Well it probably is how the Priest has experienced it, listening to others.  I could try, “I have been consistently mildly impatient.  I am so sorry but I cannot suffer fools - nope, that probably wiill earn me more bad points.  I’ll just leave it at impatience.  Do I like going to confession?  Nope, but it is a requirement.  Anyhow, let’s get to self reflection -  I am used to it.  I am now about 30 pages into my next book or more and I know what the main theme will be and I normally kill people (in my books people) so you can depend on me for that.  This time my main actor is a Psychotherapist.  I have been having people who read my books and Authors bugging me about throwing some therapy into my work.  My Protagonist is a Therapist and this may be the first of a series or not.  I am learning that readers love series.  So, yup.  I am doing it people.  I have also turned down some cushy careers, so maybe I will fictionalize that in my book.  I decided to do that today as I reflected.  Back to the webinar.  We were asked what we want from our writing careers?  Let me think - money, would be nice.  In my notes I wrote,“I’m ok with what I do.  Expectations are for others.  I am self published, would like to be more active selling my books.”  The webinar  shouted (not really.  Webinars don't shout) if you are self published, you must have friends.  So, I am thinking “friends”.  You mean real friends.  Let’s see.  I know a lot of people but lots of friends?  What pray tell is the host’s definition of friends?  How many friends do I need to be an independent author?  The host hired an editor (not what she wanted).  She hired someone to do her cover.  I have my publisher who does all that and she’s honest which is why I kept her.  I also like the covers of my books.  She suggesting booking tours, depending on budget.  Right now.  At this moment, I have no budget.  I am in limbo watching the market.  I have to prioritize and self care is having priority.  We were asked which authors we admire.  I wrote down, Dean Koontz, Stephen King, James Paterson ( which I am reading right now and threw it in my own book).  We then went into the second portion of skills and knowledge.  How do I improve my craft?  I listen.  I joined Associations.  Ok that is all for now.  This week shall all continue into next.  If you want to buy one of my books or ebooks feel free.  If not that is ok too.  No pressure.  I am still going to update all that once I re-organize all my paperwork.  I will be at Word on The Street in Sept and at the end of Aug I shall be at “Meet Your Local Author” in Mississauga.  Feel free to invite me at any event I can sell my books.  My Legion has stopped so I am open to all Legions in the area, book stores, clubs etc……..Have a good weekend people.  And for my friends out there, I am not going to increase any for profit.  I actually found that part funny.

www.silvaredigonda.myshopify.com

Intro to Old Testament - notes

 Intro to Old Testament

Deutroniminous - wandering Armenian - meaning distant, wandering, not owning land.

The Bible makes a claim, read it with interest.  Expect to encounter others in text.  Comes to us as stories, as literature.  The only way we can appreciate what God is trying to say is through literature.  If you cannot read it whole and appreciate it, it will be hard to read scripture.  An artist, writer is trying to communicate.  He approaches word of God through literature.  Book of Chronicles - record - newspaper but for most of it is drama (Old and New Testament) etc…

     What approach can you take?

1. Collins in Hebrew Text
2. History can become a vision into Old Testament (OT).  Begins with creation and ends with Maccabees. 
3. Choose something theological by asking.  Example:  What is theology?  The problem with using a single image is that it does not cover most of the books.  For example, covenant - many books do not appear to resonate with the covenant.  However, covenant is an image between the relationship with God and Israel and covenant can be a good way.  When scripture does not utilize covenant - ask what is the relationship between God and Israel and why not use the covenant?

to be continued.

Men’s Conference - Continues

Paternal and Maternal Victimization of Psychological Partner Violence and spanking from University of Michigan, Research Student (Clarke?)

     In the US, 39% of children, two to four years old were spanked.  More likely to display aggressive behaviour.  45% of men and 49% of women experience Partner violence in their lifetime.  It has a negative effect on parenting -  inconsistent discipline - attachment insecurity with children (harsh parenting).  Findings:  Maternal psychological - Partner Violence - maternal depression ; spanking three year olds.  Fathers - paternal depression did not determine spanking.  Perpetrator is not associated with spanking.  Violence in family potentially spills over to partner or parent-child.

Moving forward I would like to continue with notes having to do with psychology until I phase it out (which will be a while) once a week, theology until phased out and writers corner.   Life happens so I won't always be concise.  Thank you for reading my blogs.

silvaredigonda.myshopify.com

Women's Day and Thoughts of the Week

 Yesterday I celebrated Women’s Day, and we were asked to talk briefly about our previous lives.  We each took a turn to talk about our previous careers.  Some took the host literally and talked about a previous life, while the majority spoke of present/previous careers.  The woman sitting next to me nudged me asking what she should say.  However, there was no time, it was my turn.  I started with working with the military police for 20 years and being a veteran, working another 13 years at York University with their security and actually forgot my position - which I later recalled was campus relations and working as a psychotherapist. I may have left out that I was a Marriage and Family thapist as well.   As I listened to everyone speak two things came to mind.  One being wow, I have done a lot.  Another was how I believe everyone is equal regardless of their careers or accomplishments.  I thought of the woman sitting beside me whom had nudged me.  She didn’t know what to say.  This woman is so warm and kind.  She is a great baker and mother.  She is resilient and kind.  What I realized is that I prefer the inner soul to the exterior accomplishments of anyone,  I have been told quite a few times in my careers to focus on important people and not on the common person.  I was told that it wouldn’t help me succeed.  They meant well, but most I didn’t even like because of that reason.  They were so busy trying to impress that they ignored the average person who could do nothing for their career.  What I am thinking at this moment is that I really like myself.  When I spoke yesterday,  I didn’t mention my education or that I have written four books.  It wasn’t necessary.  I didn’t want to sound like I was bragging.  I was also thinking about how I could actually take an entire afternoon talking about accomplishments.  As I contemplate my future,  I feel that the world is mine but I want to do good with it.  I have been very disappointed regarding politicians lately from many countries, including my own.  We have had three synagogues shot at and the USA embassy shot at just in one week.  We have undesirables with extreme ideologies  who have not been deported because it is inhumane?  Excuse me?  Canadians should always be first.   We need to stop catering to the rich which is the minority.  We need to conduct research on who is living on the street beside the addicted.  We need to protect children.  We need to provide seniors with a decent minimum pension so they do not end up homeless.  We need to take voting seriously and look at the big picture.  We need to prioritize.  Global warming has not been taken seriously.  Some don’t even know what it is.  They will soon, if they haven’t figured it out yet.  We live in a beautiful world and are trying so hard to destroy it.  All these thoughts came to me as I listened to the news and celebrated Women’s Day.  I can say so much more, but I won’t today.  I want to play.

What is hope?

 What is Hope?                      By:   Silva Redigonda

     My hope is to someday live in a glass house by the waterfront with a dog at my side as I walk along the beach.   Is that hope or a dream?  Is dream and hope synonymous?  Is hope for all?

     Skinner conducted animal experiments and discovered that when one can no longer control one’s environment, one gives up trying.  A dog that suffers electrical shocks and resigns himself to acknowledge he will suffer pain no matter what he does extends to other forms of torture that kills the human soul.  Can one understand hope by understanding what it is not?  Hope is a perception of what can be.  I think that there is a possibility of world peace.  Do I really?  Actually I do not.  Therefore I have no hope for world peace because I believe that it is impossible.  Yet, I believe that something must still be done to decrease the probabilities of war.  Is that hope?  Is hope being a realist?  Is hope being a survivor?  Hope can be simple or complex.  Hope is what it means to the person who has or does not have hope.  I hope that the flowers I place at the front yard bring joy to others as they walk by and appreciate nature.  I hope, because I love to stop and appreciate the lawns of others which are aesthetically pleasing.  I am hoping that someone appreciates what I have to offer my community.  I am hoping that someone stops and smells the roses (what a cliché!).  Am I superficial?  Perhaps I am to some and not to others.  For someone who has no food, she may hope for food, if there is the remote possibility of getting food.  If someone has no hope for food it may be because he is dying, isolated and alone with no possibility of enough food to eat.  What is hope?  It is so much to so many different people depending on their own stories of their own lives.  Has life been kind? Has life crippled?  Has life taken away souls and hope is only a senseless word?  I have hope.  I dream of my glass house by the water, walking along the beach with my dog at my side as I ponder the universe because I have hope – of endless possibilities.          

ⁱ Gleitman Henry, Basic Psychology. Pg 93. New York:  Norton & Company, Third edition, 1983. 

Roman Catholics can complain about the Church. So here goes nothing.

 

     I was invited to a one day retreat, which I could probably use but once I read the email, I deleted the invitation. The woman whom was going to lead the retreat had graduated before me so I don’t think I know her.  She had a certificate of spiritual direction which I only needed a few courses myself and didn’t bother because the money wasn’t worth it - My bad.  

She has worked  many years with special needs and I am not sure what that has to do with directing a retreat, but what turned me off and made the decision not to go?  She was blessed by the Bishops for being a virgin for 50 years.  What????? Too much information and an immediate “delete.”  I had no recollection of this in any of my readings nor education so I googled it.

From Vatican News

“Church reproposes Order of Virgins 50 years after its restoration

The Congregation for Institutes of Consecrated Life and Societies of Apostolic Life releases the Instruction Ecclesiae Sponsae imago in view of the 50th anniversary of the revival of the ancient Order of Virgins.

By Sr Bernadette Mary Reis, fsp

In 2020 it will be 50 years since Pope Paul VI revived the ancient Order of Virgins. Consecrated virgins now number approximately 5,000 and live in every part of the world. The Prefect for the Dicastery for Consecrated Life, Cardinal João Braz de Aviz, says that the new Instruction Ecclesiae Sponsae imago is the first Document to address the make-up and discipline of this form of consecration. It is also a response to the interest shown in this revived vocation. It focuses specifically on its place in the Church’s life, and the necessary discernment and formation required, he says.

History

Presenting the document, Archbishop José Rodríguez Carballo, Secretary of the Dicastery, summarized the history of the Order of Virgins. The Order developed from the Gospel witness of women who gave up everything in order to follow the Lord. It so rooted itself in the fabric of the Church that it was eventually given the name Order, analogous with those of bishops, priests, deacons and widows. Eventually it was absorbed into monasticism in the middle ages.

Pope Paul VI restored the Order of Virgins in 1970, giving back to the Church a form of life which offers her a reflection of her own nature as Spouse of Christ. Archbishop Carballo said that Bishops, consecrated virgins and experts collaborated on Ecclesiae Sponsae imago. Each “offered their own contribution in order to highlight the peculiarity and richness of this form of consecrated life”, he said.

What is the Order of Virgins?

The first part of the document explores the vocation and witness of the Order of Virgins. It explains that the vocation is primarily Marian; one that embraces a chaste, poor, and obedient life as well as prayer, penance, and the works of mercy. A distinguishing factor is that “the charism to virginity is harmonized with the charism proper to each consecrated woman…with creative freedom”, Archbishop Carballo said.

How is the Order of Virgins organized?

Ecclesiae Sponsae imago explains in the second part that consecrated virgins, living singly or in their families or other groups, are organized at the diocesan level under the Bishop. Archbishop Carballo said that, as a “daughter of a particular Church, each consecrated woman shares its history…, contributes to its edification and participates in its mission with her own gifts”. Thus, the call to live a solitary life leads the consecrated woman to a life of profound communion.

How does a woman become a consecrated virgin?

Archbishop Carballo said the third part explains the discernment and formation aspects of the Order of Virgins. Here the participation of the Bishop is underlined in all of the stages, before and after a woman is consecrated.

50th anniversary of the Order of Virgins

With the 50th anniversary of the restoration of the Order of Virgins in 2020, Archbishop Carballo said that he hopes that reproposing this ancient form of consecration might demonstrate its value as “a truly attractive and demanding way of holiness”. In addition, Cardinal de Aviz hopes that the anniversary will bring consecrated virgins from all over the world to Rome for an international meeting “to celebrate the anniversary of the Rite with Peter”.”

     In another article I read that this was wanted to be returned due to requests.  Huh, huh?  By whom?  How was this resurrected?  Let me guess, men?  After all, Bishops are all men.

Why did this irk me?  I have spent a life time listening to both men and women tell me about how they were raped as adults and children, how at times when they were being sexually assaulted they were asked by Priests in confession (which they are not to as per my understanding) if they had sex and they would say yes.  Nothing else was asked, but they were made to feel guilty.  Yet it would be their fathers and his friends who were so devoted in church.  You see one of the indicators of pedophiles is being very devout in Church.  In the same article, it was stipulated that a person could not ever have been married to qualify.  So how is some one’s virginity determined?  You take their word for it?  Is there a physical examination for women?  If they are religious, do they feel obligated to have this special blessing due to shame?  Then do they feel even more guilty for lying?  Do they confess that?  I don’t care about a person’s sexuality.  Why?  Because it is none of my business, unless rape and abuse exists.  I couldn’t go to this retreat, because you know the expression, “Know thyself?”  Yup,  I do.  This is why I have to live in a democratic society because I believe in freedom to speak my mind.  Do you know that after all my years of services to the public and hearing all the stories of guilt and sexual abuse, not one of the people I dealt with would lay a complaint to go after the accused.  You have to just hear what goes on at trials, to know why.  And there is always the associated guilt and life long trauma.  And, if there is a therapist reading this blog, understand this.  You must explain to adults who were molested as children why it was not their fault.  Telling them that it wasn’t, is not enough.  Too many think that because they felt pleasure, it was their fault.  They need to know that humans are sexual beings and that pleasure is included which is exactly what these pedophiles know and use for their distorted and twisted vocation.  I think systematically.  I have been trained to do so.  We need to see the entire picture and to be made aware of our own biases.  I never thought I could feel sorry for a pedophile, until I saw the pain in one’s face.  It was distorted in agony.  There is so much that needs to be revised in our society world wide.  One is this obsession of virginity, where women are usually under the power of men.  Think, is it not horrible that women are circumcised so that they do not feel pleasure and that no man in their culture will (supposedly) not marry them if they do no endure this.  Think, is it not horrible that women will hold their female children down so this primitive custom can be performed?   Some things are best left in the middle ages and if they are permitted or returned for whatever reason, do not use it as any kind of qualification for a retreat, because I don’t want to know that the person leading me is a virgin.  Why?  Because I don’t care, and I wouldn’t be able to keep my mouth shut.  And sometimes, we should. 

From American Assocation of Couples and Family Therapy

https://plus.aamft.org/relief-under-fire-chronic-repression-and-the-reorganization-of-collective-survival/