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Tuesday, 11 March 2025

Don't think I shall make it this year but this is open to everyone. I will try to cut and past the program

 It's final - The Men and Families super exciting conference will be at the Hilton Barbados Resort this September 19 - 20, 2025.


We are extremely pleased to share with you our tentative schedule. We also have a flyer with all of the speakers on it. Please see attached. 

The conference rooms have limited space so please do not wait to register! 

Early bird: May 15

This is a hybrid conference with all (but 1) of the speakers will be in-person 🙂 

HOTEL RESERVATIONS: Limited rooms reserved!!!

We have a special conference rate of $199 USD/night (with taxes, $219 + 10% service tax + $9.63 = $249/night). So when you use the code, you'll see $219 but that's including the tax.

Or the group code: 90O

For more details, see www.IFAlliance.net 

We would be grateful if you can distribute this far and wide!

Let's make great connections in Barbados 🙂 

Can't wait to see everybody again.

Sue and Rebekah
Conference organizers


Susan S. Chuang, PhD, Acc.FM

Professor & Accredited Family Mediator 

Associate Editor, Journal of Family Psychology

Series Editor, Advances in Immigrant Family Research, Springer

Series Editor, Men, Family, and Society, Springer


Macdonald Institute, Room 133D

University of Guelph

Guelph, ON  N1G 2W1

Email: schuang@uoguelph.ca

Susan S. Chuang | Family Relations & Applied Nutrition (uoguelph.ca)


Upcoming International Men and Families Conference - Barbados September 2025www.IFAlliance.net 


Recent publication: McGraw Hill (2023)

           


Hong Kong Researcher: In Chinese Context. notes from men’s conference

 




Psychological Trauma:  stigma, cultural stigma, masculinity.  China and Hong Kong.  Traditionally three character classes in Chinese culture.  Nowadays masculinity signifies a man with material and upward mobility. Rresearch targeted research participants.  Heterosexual men,  found 19 participants:  Findings and discussion.  Male was hit by his wife with a pair of scissors.  Since then, he has had fears to sleep with her.  His wife said it was acceptable to beat her husband because he did not make enough money.  He internalized it - felt shame and ashamed.  Another participant was attacked by his ex-wife with a hot iron several times.  She criticized his ability and depreciated him as an indecisive.  Gradually he accepted her criticism as being wimpish and a coward.  He dared not express his views in front of others.

Another participant, his wife would kick him and tell him that he was useless and not making more money than her.  Many of the participants excluding four, were considered useless by their wives and not earning enough money.  Physical violence was always associated with not making enough money.


Another man was slapped and kicked by his wife in front of the children.  His daughter expressed shame, because her father could not provide enough money for her to participate in school activities.  It was found that fathers who were attacked by their mothers was contributed by the father’s relationship in that he could not provide sufficient finance.  Not having a high finance, these fathers still strive to be good fathers.  Results:  intensive shame and stigma; superiority in earning incomes, expectation of high income.  First priority is to provide financial resources.



This year the Men's conference is in the Carabean.  I do not fly and time this year is difficult since I am planning on moving.  Soon I shall be returning to Niagara to look at more houses/condos.  However, I do need 20 hours of education each year so I am going to have to attend something, which will probably be the conference by the Canadian Association of Couple and Family Therapy which will be held at Guelph University.  The last time I was there I had a great time and met wonderful people.  This time it will be difficult because we won't be babied as much.  The last time if we had a choice of hotels or staying on campus (I had a entire townhouse to myself, but I found it creepy).  Those choosing to stay at hotels had a van provided to transport them.  We had many activities where transport was provided and we had great food.  This was organized by York University Retirees.  Those were the days my friend.   This time.  Your on you own pal.  


Monday, 3 March 2025

Child sexual Abuse , University of Berlin, by Anja Berger

 At my last conference with the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists one of the speakers from Germany, Anja Berger, from Berlin’s School of Economics provided a lecture regarding child abuse, men’s sexual aggression.  The data she provided is 12 years old.  Sexual abuse is still high.  Re-victimization rate of a child is 47%.  This experience distorts the child’s self concept, view of the world and affective functioning.  Pathway:  traumatic sexualization, Betrayal:  many abusers are parents, fathers and mothers who keep quiet.  Stigmatization.  Children don’t know how to escape, what to do next.  There is a sense of what to do next - a sense of worthlessness.  Later in life there is a risk of low self esteem, helplessness and insecure attachment.  There was an experiment where every third male has experienced emotional abuse in childhood.  Men we see you and hear you.  Continue to work with the group and vulnerable behaviour starts and the question is how to help you?  The study was explained and it consists of University students.  This would probably increase among non-university students, depending on social economics.  


     This year the conference will be held in California.  I wish it was closer.  Attending  all depends if I buy a house in Niagara and if I am settled and also the costs of course.  Time will tell.  I will be attending a conference in Guelph hopefully with the Canadian Association of Couple and Family Therapy.  At the moment I may see clients in Ontario and Quebec on line or in person.  I do however consult outside the area.  


If there are any errors here I claim full responsibility.   www.redigondapsychotherapy.com.



Friday, 28 February 2025

Thoughts of the Week - Rob Ford congrats for winning 3rd election/ Niagara Falls

 It's been a busy week, but most beneficial.  I wasn't sure if I would be able to vote because I couldn't get out of the drive due to the mountains of snow which has not been cleared by the city. - bad city.  However, nature wanted me to vote, so it rained and rained and warmed up just so I could get out, which meant I could vote.  I belong to St Paul's riding and this year the Liberals won first spot which they losed to the NDP last time.  Conservatives came last.  But Rob won overall with a majority and so I may just get free go train service as a Vet.  Time will tell.  I have been thinking a lot about Niagara Falls and have selected two spots of interest.  One is a condo in Chippawa.  Now Chippawa is part of the City of Niagara Falls.  With this particular place there are stairs galore from the ground to the second, but I was told I could put in a chair lift.  The only reason I would consider it is because the location is cute.  I can just walk across the bridge for my coffee and in the summer I can drink it sitting at the picnic tables overlooking the river.   I can watch Niagara's Falls fireworks from my small balcony (it looks small).  There is a parkette across from my condo with a gazebo where there is music during the summer.  Looking out of a window I can see the clock of the closed Town Hall.  No it is not Rockwell, it is Chippawa where James Cameron (Titanic) hails from.  Very cute.  Now during late March I will have about three free  hours in Niagara FAlls where I can look at houses so if it is still on the Market I may just put in an offer, depending on those stairs.  Can I grow old in there?  Don't know.  But there is a shop next door that sells flowers, a grocery store (which doesn't seem to have anything vegetarian) a hair salon, a pet grooming service, a veterinarian and more.  Eventually, I would like a doggie.  I would be able to cross the bridge and walk along the river to the Falls.  But that is about four kilometers away.  I love water.  So, the house looks like a recent development, is also cute with a basement apartment and main floor space for me.  It has a gazebo in the backyard and enough parking for two.  I would need a car for anything and everything.  That does not appeal to me.  However, I know people want to visit me and it is better since I hail from Toronto which has a lot of people.  So, lots to think about.  If you are thinking about buying a house, please go see it first.  Sometimes pictures are so deceiving.  A house can look big and surprise, it's not (remember my first trip?).  An offer was placed on that house I liked near the river.  I don't know yet what the offer is and if it was accepted so I am curious of course.  Oh that small town also has a cute white library nearby.  As you can see, I like cute.  It also has a Catholic Church - nice.  So, I'm good.  Let's wait and see what happens.  In March I plan to socialize a lot due to my being snowed in so much.   Please have a wonderful weekend.  Ensure you balance your life.  We need people and we need a safe place.  Find a space for yourself, where you can be yourself.  Surround your self with caring people who accept you as you are.  There are many people in the States now losing their jobs.  People can identify themselves with their work and when that is lost, there may be a sense of loss of identity of self.  This may be a good time to ask the question, "Who am I?"  The way this is being done right now in the State may cause moral injury.  I wrote of it before along with PTSD, so I won't repeat myself.  If you are new here, you can search at the top and it should appear for you.  Find relaxation in music, art, dance, etc.....Anyhow, have a wonderful weekend.  What do you think? 

Monday, 24 February 2025

T-buds Tea Lounge and Cafe - I love their classical Tea

 I treated myself (still snowed in with my sad car) this weekend with a delivery of my Classical Tea.  Their High Tea includes more but it also contains meat.  They are now delivered by uber eats.  But going in person is worth the experience.  T Buds is situated on the East side of the Road, North of Lawrence on Yonge Street.  You need to find parking on the street.  You also need to be able to climb the stairs to the second floor and it brings you into a small but well used space.   The husband and wife team are from Pakistan, a delightful couple.  They have lived in Canada for 13 years and it is wonderful to have them.  Now I am not a tea drinker so they did bring me coffee.  Their speciality is tea and I was educated on their expertise.  There are mega canisters of various teas to offer




customers.  I was brought champagne (non alcoholic) tea and it was wonderful and refreshing.  If you stop in Toronto, I recommend you go and attend this fine gem.  If you are living in Toronto, please check it out and support our small businesses.  www.t-buds.com