The Internet Murders - Updated website http://www.silvaredigonda.ca Teaser

Teaser Time: “Moving towards his Pontiac, as he fumbled with his keys, he slipped on a patch of oil on the rain-slicked sidewalk. He tried to catch his balance, but fell, hitting his head hard. He hadn’t seen the figure who had been watching him approach and begin to follow him. He didn’t feel his head being raised and smashed against the curb. George had never realized that he would die thinking about wine in his cellar and Sandra who would appreciate it.” Chapter 2 Robert was aware of his good looks. He didn’t have to flaunt it. He noticed the girls in the office trying to get his attention and because he kept it cool, they only wanted him more. “Hey Robert! Are we going clubbing Friday, after work?” called Paul. Paul knew that the only way women would pay attention to him would be if he was with Robert. His little paunch wouldn’t draw any women, but Robert’s muscular build did, and someone might notice him too. Not even a badge was helping Paul. He wondered why women couldn’t appreciate him. Paul knew that he really didn’t like Robert. Robert was too much of everything. He was too good-looking, had too good a body and worst of all, everything came easy to him. He didn’t even have to work, because he was wealthy. He had it all. What really pissed Paul off was that Robert was good at his job too.” Excerpt From: Silva Redigonda. “The Internet Murders.” iBooks. Just want to let you know that my website was designed for me. Yesterday I noticed that the payment was being directed to the person who set up my web. I have contacted shopify. Colpa mia. I had placed this website aside due to my worlk load. This is however a secure site. I chose Shopify, a Canadian Company because you can know what your shipping charges are as set by Canada Post. I did not have this opportunity with my last website which I will continue with as well until it expires. Subsequently, you may now order my books and ebooks from around the world. If you have any difficulties please notify me, but that should not happen. I love writing stories but sometimes I get busy with my practice. I sometimes ponder if I should just follow my passion of writing. However, I am not ready to do this at this moment. I enjoy working as well. Please do not hesitate to inform me of what you think of my books, especially if you are outside Canada. It is my passion. I have been complimented, scolded etc...in person. I take it all but must admit I prefer kindness. Until next week. Please keep safe during this pandemic. Please reach out to those who are alone. Love your family and pets and get the help you need if that is required. What do you think? http://silvaredigonda.ca

Men and Masculinity (Social Science notes) Abuse of women

Ok, Remember that Men and Masculinity course I mentioned taking in Undergrad? We had quite a few books to read which were all about men, thus the topic, and I have some loose leaf notes for you. Remember that the stats are a few years back but still relevant today. I worked as an intern for a year with women who had been abused and I actually stepped in when there was a discussion that a woman had to testify against her abuser. I corrected this misinformed person. It is important that people who work with the abused understand the law themselves in their support of the people they serve. How does male violence affect society? A huge study released by statistics Canada in 1993 (white ribbon campaign handout) informs us that one in two Canadian women has experienced physical or sexual violence since the age of 16. The study’s definition of violence follows Criminal Code of Canada and does not include the many forms of sexual harassment women experience everyday. Violence against women in Canada takes a variety of forms including physical assault, sexual assault, sexual harassment, psychological abuse and emotional abuse. Not all violence leaves physical scars. Violence against women consists of sexist jokes to domineering forms of behaviour, battering and murder. (I am going to include financial abuse which was not mentioned at the time). Three out of four women in your neighbourhood fear using public transport after dark. Only two in five feel safe walking in their neighbourhood after dark. Basic rights that men enjoy are the source of fear of the majority of Canadian women. The fear is greatest in women’s own homes. A common myth is that violence against women is committed by strangers. In fact women are most at risk from men they know - their husbands, boyfriends, dates, uncles, employers and caregivers. Of women who experienced violence only 23% was by a stranger. Almost one in three women (29%) who have ever been married or lived in a common-law relationship have experienced violence at the hands of their male partners. Every seven minutes a sexual assault is committed in Canada. 90% of the victims are women. Violence against women occurs in every region of Canada, among the rich, poor, middle class and among those of every nationality, religion and race. Violence is something learned. It is a result of the way many men learn to express their masculinity in relationships with women, children and other men. Gloria Steinem revealed that one in four women is sexually assaulted in her life time. 51% of college men said they would rape if they could get away with it. Domestic violence is the single largest cause of injury to women in the U.S.A. More than half of battering husbands also abuse their children. Battered women are more likely to be killed after attempting to escape, yet 40% of women who apply for shelters for themselves and their children cannot find one. How does Male violence affect society? Kaufman talks about violence being institutionalized as an acceptable means of solving conflict. Now the world over poses a threat to the future of life itself. The daily work life of industrial and class societies, is one of violence. It is violence that exposes workers to the dangers of chemicals, radiation, machinery; muscle strain. It is violence that condemns the majority to work to exhaustion for forty or fifty years and then to be thrown into society’s garbage bin for the elderly and used up. The racism, sexism and heterosexism that have been institutionalized in our societies are socially regulated acts of violence. Kaufman in Beyond Patriarch reveals that violence is not only against women, but also against other men and oneself. Violence against other men is visible throughout society. Some forms such as fighting, the ritualized, display violence of teenagers and some groups of adult men, institutionalized rape in prisons and attacks on gay or racial minorities are very direct expressions of this violence. In many sports, violence is incorporated into exercise and entertainment. More subtle forms are the verbal putdowns or combined with economic and other factors, the competition in the business, political or academic world. In its more frightening form violence has long been an acceptable and even preferred method of addressing differences and conflicts among different groups and states. Beyond Patriarchy expresses concern about the affect of sports on relations with other men. Sports where territorial control is important such as football, basket ball, boxing and hockey encourage athletes to treat each other as enemies to be intimidated and brutalized, when in reality they are co-players without whom the rewards of playing cannot be obtained. Kaufman refers to Allan Sack, an American Sociologist who played in the 1966 Notre Dame Championship football team. He said that in many ways football is a training ground for rape. In the game, players learn to control the field to dominate other players and in the dressing room they endlessly fantasize and celebrate the male sexual conquest of women. There is violence in Not a Love Story. Penthouse and Playboy both sold more than three times and New Week together (at the time this would have been studied. Three to one porn outsell “normal” movies. A woman who makes love to her boyfriend hears a man from the audience yell F——H——. Hurt her. Because she has a small frame and he is big. Hurting women is bonding men. One impotent man felt strong again when watching women be dominated. Pornography is filled with the desecration of a woman’s body. The power of the woman’s psyche has to be destroyed. More violence is required to stimulate. One photo depicted a woman in a meat grinder. Pornography - anti sexuality. The conclusion is the destruction of the human body. The soul knows that the spirit is in the body. By violating the sexually, you are violating the soul. Rather than dealing with the negativeness in ourselves, we direct it at others. Can Rapist be Stopped exposes how rapists get excited thinking rape when following a van with a woman within. Even in aversion therapy, violence is still used by an electrical charge to the man’s private part when excited. Another rapist attempted to rape his mother and then killed her. Over 60% of men at this centre were sexually abused as children. Therapist in the movie said that they (rapists) feel powerful being in control. Number of men who have committed suicide are more than killed in the U.S. (At that time). Anybody’s Son Will Do - There are 20 wars at any given time. Narrator states that soldiers are a modern street gang. The army indoctrinates recruits that the enemy is not human so it is ok to kill him. It does not take a special kind of person, anyone’s son will do. We employ soldiers to do the dying for us. Kaufman in Cracking the Armour states that no woman can feel completely secure because 30% to 50% of women have been beaten, raped or victimized by incest, and countless more have been pressured into having sex or have been sexually harassed at work or on the street. Paul Kivel’s, Men Work reveals that men don’t suddenly appear in life, armed and dangerous. It takes years and years of training to turn boys into violent men. We taught the boys to fight, stand up for themselves, stay in control, and have no feelings to make them vulnerable. This strategy set up both girls and boys as targets of violence. Kivel too speaks of positive portrayals of violence in our culture. Our movie and sports heroes use violence and are rewarded for it with power, status, money and women.

Compassion and Imagination in Leadership (RC)

I was looking for my notes on the Old Testament which has disappeared mysteriously. So, I shall get out my other notes and surprise you each time. Hopefully my Old Testament will re-appear. I have still much to share with you. For now I thought you would like to listen to this lecture at your own free time. I enjoyed it. Hopefully you shall too. This lecture was held on January 15, 2021 featuring Fiona Dalton, President and CEO of Providence Health Care and Michael W. Higgins, Interim Principal at St. Mark’s College. Have a good week. Please keep safe. If you ever have a question for me, feel free to ask.

More from the Internet Murders. Your teaser for the day. www.silvaredigonda.ca

George had thought the coffee shop was open 24 hours. Now what? Looks like he wasn’t the only one wanting a coffee. The tall dark stranger was walking away from the coffee shop and looking up at a woman on the second floor. She’s pretty, he thought. Probably wanted to get her a coffee, before interrupting her work on the computer. I would get her more than coffee, he thought, smirking at the possibility. He would go and see Sandra later and bring her a bottle of wine. But, he needed his coffee. He tried the front door of the coffee shop again before heading back to his car. “Why did I park it several blocks away?” he asked aloud. He looked up again and noticed that the woman was gone and the place looked dark. He wasted no time, thought George. He began walking east on Davenport. He loved this city. George wasn’t originally from Toronto, but he called it home after living here for ten years. He stopped walking, to look up at Casa Loma for a few minutes, and knew why he had parked away from the coffee shop. He enjoyed looking up at the castle. Poor bugger, he thought. The city took the castle from the poor bloke for not being able to pay his taxes. Nothing’s changed; a man’s home is always his castle. With prices the way they are and banks all merging and ganging up on the little guy, it was only a matter of time … Sandra. He looked back up the street and noticed the dark figure exit the building. That’s odd, he thought. Guess she didn’t like it that he didn’t bring her coffee. Good thing that he had wine stocked up in his wine cellar. Moving towards his Pontiac, as he fumbled with his keys, he slipped on a patch of oil on the rain-slicked sidewalk. He tried to catch his balance, but fell, hitting his head hard. He hadn’t seen the figure who had been watching him approach and begin to follow him[…]” Excerpt From: Silva Redigonda. “The Internet Murders.” iBooks. ”

Taping the Inauguration of Joe Biden.

My thoughts are with the American people today, hoping for a peaceful unity.

Up to date information about COVID-19 Vacines (Reminder that I am in Toronto and the Province is Ontario, in Canada)

Monday, 18 Jan 21, I attended a forum regarding the latest at that time regarding the vaccine, how it works etc...The speaker was Jennie Johnstone, MD, PHD, Medical Director at Sinai hospital. She had been working hard throughout the holiday season. The first dose was provided 14 Dec 20. An ethical framework is being followed. This is informed by the NACI guidelines. Prioritization is governed by the Provincial Covid-19 Vaccine Distribution Task Force. Ptizer Bion Tech and Moderna has ben approved by Health Canada. We expect it to be highly affective. 95% is rarely heard of. I will let you look up the references below that shall provide the same information that I would be providing you. Both of the vaccines are mRNA vaccines. MRNA provide injections to our cells to make a piece of the virus called the spike protein. It cannot result in you being infected with Covid - 19. Injections are in the arm. You can expect a sore arm, fatigue, headache, myalgias, chills, joint pain, and fever. This is due to the immune response. Symptoms are normally mild and is generally gone after 48 hours. If you have any concerns regarding being eligible speak to your MD first. Having a history of Covid-19 is not a caution. You still need to be vaccinated to ensure prolonged protection. Those with a history of anaphylaxis, if allergic to it or substance in it should not be vaccinated. Check with your doctor. You would still need to continue with the safety guidelines, social distancing, mask wearing, washing hands, and any other safeguards you are doing. Benefits outweigh the risks with the majority of people. Dr Johnstone has experience with long Term Care and Hospital Staff. She stated that we have very high rates of COVID right now. There is some wiggle room between vaccines. Can we still spread the virus if vaccinated? At this moment in time we don't know. We may still be able to shed and infect. Dr Johnstone thinks this is revolutionary. MNRA tech can easily shift to MRNA. In the past we had to start all over again. We have the entire world working on this. We never had a MNR vaccine before. There are other vaccines like Oxford's in England, which is more traditional. You are not immune between vaccines required. I encourage you to look up the sites below for more information. There is a breakdown of two vaccines which I have in my notes but should be listed in the references. I was not able to cut and paste the slides. Keep safe. COVID-19 Vaccines • Watch:Dr.JeffPowisanswers5questionsabouttheCOVID-19Vaccine(10min) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5SOt1pmCBNk&t=3s • Watch:Dr.JeffPowisCOVIDVaccineTownhallforLTCWorkerswithDr.JeffPowis(1hour) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pw6l1BWx19Q&feature=youtu.be • Read:InformationaboutthePfizer-BioNTechCOVID-19vaccineforhealthcareprofessionalsinCanada(Pfizer) https://www.cvdvaccine.ca/ • Read:HowthePfizer-BioNTechCOVID-19vaccineworksandhowit’sadministered(HealthCanada) https://www.canada.ca/en/health-canada/services/drugs-health-products/covid19-industry/drugs-vaccines- treatments/vaccines/pfizer-biontech.html#a2 • Watch:UnderstandingCOVID-19:HowVaccinesWork(YaleSchoolofMedicine)(4min) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oNfkE0lKOtM

Relationship Rebalancing: A New Tool for relational Repair Notes (Actually tools are not too new after all)

This was one of the lectures I decided to attend with the American Association of Family Therapy. I was actually hoping for a new tool. The lecture (online) began with a slide showing a black male talking to a black policeman. The lecturer began talking saying that this was unusual. I cringed on the other side of the world web. In my notes I wrote to myself that I didn’t think so and how divided - in US. This was last year before all this mess in Washington. I have never in all my careers ever had anyone begin a lecture with something like this. I wondered at the lecturer’s bias. If someone is going to produce a slide and make such a statement it has to be backed up with evidence or research. None was presented. This was a photo that her son had taken. Nice. She continued to talk about a movie “Ladybird” which she stated is a story about marriage. She talked about moving from despair to repair. She talked about apology and forgiveness. She talked about vows and new vows and to rejoin as members of the same team. She talked about planning a special outing as a family. She talked about renewal-recreation and fun. What she called rebalancing is a form of my own training which I don’t really classify as new. She talked about contempt/criticism to commitment. She talked about arguments to agreements. She talked about right and wrong to respect. She had been interviewed by Fox 29. She then talked about asking the couple of one thing that they like. I don’t have anything else because most of this new tool is what I have been practicing for more than a decade. I know that the Canadian Association of Family Therapy asked us to volunteer for couple therapy in emergency situations. I attended one of their lectures and the focus because of time was to focus on one thing that the couple was hoping to work on immediately. In emergency situations it is always different than every day life. I understand the concept of working on the most crucial aspect which is important to the couple. This also can apply in situations where the couple states what the conflict is in their relationship. Sometimes there are underlying roots that require attention. Emotions can be very high during the first few sessions and that is usually a focus of control. Once the emotions are diffused than the real work can begin. Couples each have an opportunity to talk and to respond to each other. Work is always done to connect and not to confront. Sometimes couples don’t want to compromise or make changes or try to work on their relationship and decide to divorce or break up. Sometimes the couple only needs a few sessions to get back on track. Sometimes, there is addiction and that is the elephant in the room. So, did I learn new tools? No, I did not. When I tried to explain that the lecture had actually been similar to my own training, it was not welcomed. Communication is so important with couples. Listen to each other - really listen. If you blow up at your partner ask yourself why and what is triggering you. Talk to you next week. More to come from this conference. Today I will be attending a lecture, Compassion and Social Justice. Next Monday I shall be attending a talk about the vaccine. I had a wonderful holiday and though I did not go anywhere due to the pandemic, I enjoyed getting back to my book. I have to figure out how to spend more time on that. Please keep safe. I am always happy to hear when someone tells me that they are vaccinated. I can’t wait!