Suicide Ideation in Children under 10 years old. AAMFT Conference continues (notes)

 73% of community self thought of suicide  of eight.  60% did not have a mental health diagnosis.  70% of moms did not know that children thought of suicide.  Children as young as six, understand the concepts of death and suicide.  Where do children learn about suicide?  They learn it by video games, on line and my own experience with children includes watching  television.

 Welcome Parent - Child Discord:  Transform the experience of Conflict Part 1- V116.  Psychologists Drs Kat Scherer and Elizabeth Sylvester website :relationship based treatment.com Relationship - Based Treatment of children and their parents:  Integrating neurobiology, attachment, regulation and discipline.  Do I embrace conflict?  No one really loves it.  May feel disreguated, avoid it.  Personal history activates.  Some of us are very sensitive (therapists).  50/50 in session of conflict resolution.  Book:  The Power of Discord.Children will learn comfort and skills.  : Unrealistic expectations of child.  Embarassed others see this conflict.  Children learn how to feel and regulate discomfort.  Communicate and seek resolution.  Diverse opinion - expansive and creative.  Self awareness and interception, reconnection and repair is possible.  We can surpress children.  What happens is the child becomes a people pleaser to avoid conflict which is not healthy.  Conflict resolution - promotes growth, standing up to herself (child) is ok.  It promotes self esteem.  Their perspective is worthy of being heard.  Learn where there is different desires - respect growth, and compassion for others.   Learning to listen, take a break, conflict and resolution helps to understand all family members.  It teaches that parents boundaries are positive.  Eg.  nine year old female is explosive - curses and screams and tears things.  Parents are stressed, irritated and angry.  They are also worried, fearful; guilty.  The child is also miserable.  She feels like she is a bad girl and kind of stuck.  Heated moments:  when we  experience conflict we are in a poor state for addressing it; when calm the conflict feels distant.    (as usual any errors are mine alone)

To be continued ........... 

Multiple mezuzahs removed from doorways in North York | Councillor James...

Humour of the Day

https://www.facebook.com/share/p/1D44rp5fxg/ 

Our failing Health system needs serious attention

I had my own experience at Sunnybrook Hospital and am one of the one's who walked out prepared to die at home if I had to  - details in an earlier blog.   The emergency room was full of loudness, and I had a 10 hour wait to just get triage.  Triage should be immediate to determine seriousness and priority.  

Trauma Informed - continues notes. AAMFT Conference

 Students with involved fathers earned higher grades.

Help couples goal to shift from being right to being connected.  Track and highlight bids for connection - eg.  "I noticed you give your partner water."

From function to connection.  Clarity in communication.  Repairing mapping after rupture.  Creating a secure attachment.  Nurturing- increased intimacy.  When safety is felt, trust follows (check out Gottman Tools).

Working with ambivalent clients.  Part 2. Are they owning their own contribution to the marriage?  What is their attitude towards divorce.

Discernment Counselling

-Not interested in couple therapy to help gain clarity and confidence in their decision about the future of the marriage, based on a deeper understanding of what's happened and their marriage and each person's contributions to the problems > an honest look at the hurtful interaction patterns in the marriage (this can be done in couple therapy sessions).

12% of couples who divorce think they could have done something to save the marriage. 

A friendly reminder that I am in the process of closing down my practice but will still provide you with notes from conferences I have attended.  Though I may still stay with one membership, I shall be focusing on my books and writing the next one which had to be paused.  I attended a writing event yesterday.   

Senator Mark Kelly on Trump Suggesting He Be Executed & Hegseth Opening ...

Did I mention I love Christmas??????Of course you know that world! Happy Thanksgiving America - will be watching your parade

Have a great weekend!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!