What is Hope?

What is Hope? By: Silva Redigonda My hope is to someday live in a glass house by the waterfront with a dog at my side as I walk along the beach. Is that hope or a dream? Is dream and hope synonymous? Is hope for all? Skinner conducted animal experiments and discovered that when one can no longer control one’s environment, one gives up trying. A dog that suffers electrical shocks and resigns himself to acknowledge he will suffer pain no matter what he does extends to other forms of torture that kills the human soul. Can one understand hope by understanding what it is not? Hope is a perception of what can be. I think that there is a possibility of world peace. Do I really? Actually I do not. Therefore I have no hope for world peace because I believe that it is impossible. Yet, I believe that something must still be done to decrease the probabilities of war. Is that hope? Is hope being a realist? Is hope being a survivor? Hope can be simple or complex. Hope is what it means to the person who has or does not have hope. I hope that the flowers I place at the front yard bring joy to others as they walk by and appreciate nature. I hope, because I love to stop and appreciate the lawns of others which are aesthetically pleasing. I am hoping that someone appreciates what I have to offer my community. I am hoping that someone stops and smells the roses (what a cliché!). Am I superficial? Perhaps I am, for some and not to others. For someone who has no food, she may hope for food, if there is the remote possibility of getting food. If someone has no hope for food it may be because he is dying, isolated and alone with no possibility of enough food to eat. What is hope? It is so much to so many different people depending on their own stories of their own lives. Has life been kind? Has life crippled? Has life taken away souls and hope is only a senseless word? I have hope. I dream of my glass house by the water, walking along the beach with my dog at my side as I ponder the universe because I have hope – of endless possibilities. i Gleitman Henry, Basic Psychology. Pg 93. New York: Norton & Company, Third edition, 1983. As a therapist I have seen people come with the hope that I can help them. At times people want me to tell them what to do because it is too much for them and overwhelming. They just want to feel better. However, I cannot tell others what they should or should not do. What I can do is have them step back and examine what it is they actually want for themselves and help them to help themselves get there. People often complain that those around them are constantly telling them who to be, how to act, how to dress, who to love etc.....Sometimes, they just need the tools to help them stand up and re-examine who they are and who the people are in their lives that they need to stand up to and live the lives they want to. Sometimes, people are at the end of their rope and suicide looks like an option, though they don't want to really take that route. It is just the hopelessness of their situation. Suicide is not an option. Recently a man was arrested just outside Toronto where he was living. Apparently he was "counselling people to die" and providing them with substances which he was being paid for. What kind of person does that? I shall leave that with the courts. What I will say to you is to stay away from people like that. Find qualified Registered Therapists, psychologists etc....to help you find the hope you lost track of. When I wrote the above paper What is Hope, it was for me, how I see the world and my own dream. Would I still love a glass house by the waterfront with a dog by my side? Of course. Will it happen? I don't know. However, my hope has never diminished. Is there someone in your life, you are always belittling? Do you tell them how to dress, wear their hair etc...Are these grown men and women? Ask yourself why you do this and ask yourself if you are causing harm? Better yet, why not ask them? What do you think?