Psychology Today reports: “People with disabilities are often made to feel as though their bodies are public property” (Dec 21, p 24-25)

I wasn’t going to write about this today. I wanted to refer to another article I read in the same magazine. Actually, there are quite a few articles that are interesting to report and discuss. However, this morning while watching the news, I saw a video of a man roughly being handled by at least two men, whom was being thrown out along with his service dog from a rib and other meat kind of restaurant in Milton, Ontario. I went to Milton years ago and it looked like I was going back into time. It has grown a lot since then and I only notice it when driving on the Highway. This man reported that he had produced proof that his dog was a service dog. I find it unbelievable that every day I hear some notorious act happening where it is not ok. In matter of fact it is criminal. People seem to being suing more and more which I remember only Americans doing but we have caught on and rightly so. I am surprised that the dog did not attack the men assaulting his owner because that is what I observed from my angle. I am curious to see what is going to be explained here. So, that is why I am going to talk about the article regarding disability as discussed in this article: Dean has a movement disorder and is often asked by strangers what is wrong with him. Strangers ask him personal questions on a daily basis, make fun of him etc….These are strangers asking what happened to him, was he born that way etc….The article written by Karen Stoliznow, Ph.D, states that there is a tendency and entitlement to ask these personal questions and to expect answers. The article continues with comments such as “you look so normal; are you really disabled?” One veteran responded to an employee asking, “How do we know you are even disabled?” His response was that he was blown up in Afghanistan and he pulled up his pants showing his prosthetic limb. The article indicates that the rate of violent victimization of people with disabilities is 2.5 times higher than without (USA Department of Justice). The article ends with disability etiquette which in my words are “it is none of your business.” In the writers more etiquette words respect the privacy of people with disabilities but does state that “their personal information is none of our business, unless they want to share it.” She indicates that most people have good intentions and don’t wish to be offensive, but this can all take an emotional toll for the person being asked the question. This author’s book include On The Offensive: Prejudice in Language Past and Present. Years ago while working in my second career, I was near the Track and Field and I observed a man wearing the most remarkable running shoes. I had to ask where he bought them. I wanted a pair for myself. I was stunned when he showed me that he had a prosthetic leg. He spent about five minutes explaining the running shoe, costs etc…. He let me know that sorry, so sad, you can't buy them. Another time I was asked a question and I turned away from my car to face two men, one man’s face seemed ripped apart. I cannot remember what they were asking me but I replied casually. The man with the disfigured face started a conversation with me and I responded in turn. Never once did I ask him anything about what had happened to him. Never once did he volunteer on his own. I wasn’t a therapist at the time either. I had been shopping at a large hardware store. It must have been refreshing for the man to have a general conversation with a woman without showing any attention to anything else but the topic on hand. This is a good time to have a conversation with your child and yourself regarding what is appropriate. No one likes to be stared at negatively or to be horrified by a person’s disfigurement. We are all people with feelings and we all want to be loved and not dehumanized. As I end this, I wonder what I will hear on the news tonight about this restaurant in Milton. How are they going to explain this? Were the police called? Will this go to court and how much will he sue? Sometimes, people need a wake up call, that it is not ok to hurt others. Have a good weekend. Mine was very productive. I attended another Sisters In Crime event where I am learning more and more about the world of selling books. I must admit I prefer writing them than the business side of the house. You know I have two websites. www.silvaredigonda.ca and www.redigondapsychotherapy.com What do you think?