Elder Abuse tid bit and Marriage with special needs children tid bits and hey how about me tid bits?

Today I received an email from EAPO (the Elder Abuse Prevention). Did you know that 93% of seniors reside in the community? This year elder abuse increased by 250%. I have attended their webinars and I find them quite informative. If you are interested check out their web site: www.EAPON.ca. I also finished reading my American Association For Marriage and Family Therapy magazine (Sep/Oct) edition. Did you know that while the divorce rate in the U.S.A. has held near 50%, limited data suggest there is a divorce rate as high as 70%-80% with parents of special needs children. p 32. I am pleased to say that I am reducing my work load now that I have given up all EAP and insurance. It is nice having private clients ------ so much easier. Now I can give my writing more attention. I am now going through my second draft for at least an hour a day when possible. Good thing too because I am making changes and correcting simple grammar. I love this book. I have also provided all my renewal requirments from my college. I am still recording my webinars for this year which means that you shall be updated as I record whatever I think may be interesting for you. I want to spend more time on the business side of the house for my books. My bad. I shall get there hopefully before Christmas. We now have a new varient of Covid so please get vaccinated. It does not hurt.....Kids are getting it now and I must say they are much more braver. When I was a child, I had to go get a needle and I asked the nurse if it was going to hurt. She made the mistake of saying a little, so it took about six of them to hold me down. Once I received the prick I looked at her and told her it did not hurt. Maybe I called her a liar? So when I was watching the news last night and heard the doctor say it could hurt a little, I smiled remembering. Be brave, it does not hurt. Ask for a reward from your partner, parent, or children......Keep safe. I recommend ice cream. What do you think?

Peter Gibbs, Poetry Anthology, Let the good Rhymes Roll sent me a Christmas Card by mistake

I received two Christmas cards today. One was one I sent myself which was returned. They were long time family friends who had lived in the same place for as long as I can remember from my early youth. I would visit them at times throughout the years and each year we exchanged Christmas cards. I received one from them last year so I was surprised that my card was returned as unknown person. The last time I saw them was at a funeral three years ago. COVID has stopped me from visiting anyone especially the elderly. So today I did some investigating (limited) with negative results. My sibling shall be on the scent trail. I also received a Christmas card from Peter Gibbs. Thank you Peter for the kind words, but I don't know you. It costs a pound and 70 for the postage and Alexa was trying to give me the exchange rate. I believe one pound is 1.70. She sometimes tells me that she doesn't know that, whenever I ask her too many questions. Sometimes, she is more accommodating. Siri just tells me he doesn't get it and try again. Siri thought I was asking in weight. I am not complaining. I like asking computers for facts and most times they comply. I thought you could find anyone on the web but I cannot find you Peter Gibbs. I did see your book but not your contact information. You did send it to my address but the postal code is wrong and I couldn't pin point one address with the code. So, even though I searched I could not find your contact info or the person you were trying to reach. Even your website doesn't have a way to contact you. So, I shall hang your Christmas card with my others and it is only fair to say thank you since I love Christmas cards. Merry Christmas to you and maybe you should have at least an email on your site in case your fans want to write. I have never received a Christmas card from England before so it is rather nice. Should you see this if you ever type your name, let me know who you want to actually have this and it can be done.

The Internet Murders - silvaredigonda.ca

Sandra stirred and her eyes slowly opened. “Hi Sandra. My name is Philip. My partner and I were first on the scene. How are you feeling?” Sandra looked up at the tall man who had spoken to her. He has the most amazing eyes, she thought just as a spasm of pain seized her body. She winced. “You’ve been through quite an ordeal. Do you know who attacked you?” Sarah tried to answer that she didn’t, but she felt herself slowly drifting off. The doctor entered. She too admired the good looks of the officer, which was not missed by Philip. She told him that the patient had been sedated. She would be in that state for a few days. The physician continued in a professional tone, “Her ribs have abrasions and contusions as does most of her body, and she has had forty stitches to close her head wound. She also has a gash on her right forearm, a knife wound, I suspect.” The patient would heal without complication, however, and the doctor wanted her to rest as much as possible. The nurse, who was still in the room, realized the effect the policeman had on her, even though she had been married for only a few months. He smiled at her and she thought she was going to melt. She left hurriedly to get away from his spell. Philip looked down at Sandra and watched her sleeping peacefully. He wanted the person who did this to her. She reminded him of his little sister. She had died so young. Tears filled his eyes at the thought of his little sister taken much too young and much too violently.

Excerpt From: Silva Redigonda. “The Internet Murders.” iBooks.

Sexual Child Abuse

I indicated in my last blog that the next writing will be regarding another article I read on psychology today, pp20 - 23, that I wanted to share with you. The writer in the article belonged to a religious cult and she wrote a book about her experiences “Sex Cult Nun: Breaking Away from the Children of God, a Wild, Radical Religious Cult” by Faith Jones. I won’t talk about her story. But she states that a component of sexual abuse is power disparity. Children cannot give meaningful consent and any consent involves undue pressure. She continues that children don’t have the ability to understand the ramifications of the act. They experience emotional trauma, at times delayed, when they realize what was done to them and what was taken. Years ago I was listening to a man talk to a group of us telling us how it is beneficial to a child to learn how to make love. I knew he was a pedophile. He did not know, that I knew. However, I did tell him what I thought about his comment among his peers. A few days later he approached me to explain, because he didn’t want me to think he liked kids. Since then I have met a few other pedophiles and when introduced to another, I saw him trembling as he spoke to me and then it happened. I felt sorry for him. In grad studies, I took a Couple Therapy and family research course during the summer at Guelph University and my research proposal was pedophile priests which I posted here in my blog years ago. In my second career I took a three day sexual assault course in Sudbury. I have mentioned that before. The course began with a woman telling her story about how her father and brother both sexually assaulted her while growing up. She reported it to the OPP Officer leading the course and said that she felt right about talking to the female Officer, because not once did she look at her watch. When this was investigated her mother denied that this was going on, as did the other family members (her father and brother). She was told that she had shamed the family and was disowned. Since then as a therapist I cannot count how many men and women I have seen who have been sexually, physically and emotionally abused. I always inform them that they can report it to the police. No one except one has done so. If I see a child, I would have to report it by law. However, before I see a client I disclose when I have a duty to report. It is standard. What I want to add is if you are a therapist reading this, it is also important to let the person know, that we are sexual beings and sex feels good. Pedophiles know this and many have children feeling guilt which extends to adulthood. But children don’t have the maturity to understand this. The harm that sexual abuse does to a child is devastating. The shame is enormous. The shame should never be theirs but those who abuse them. Shame and guilt is common in many who come to therapy, for a variety of reasons. People are told that they are not responsible, but often they haven’t processed that or relieved themselves of such. I can’t think of anything worse than hurting a child. Others come extremely close. There are some who have been so abused by everyone in their childhood, that they are afraid to have children, thinking the same will happen to their children. There are those who believe it is acceptable in their culture because that is what they have experienced. Some of these children find lucrative careers as they grow older and are full of warmth and kindness. I am often in awe of the people who come to me for help and I realize it is a privilege. If you are being abused report it. If who you tell doesn’t believe you, tell a person in authority. Understand you can report this to the police. You are not alone. What do you think?

Spirituality and Recovery ( please bang head here attached)

I attended a one hour live webinar during my lunch break, thinking that it would be interesting. I wanted to hear about how spirituality is utilized in Recovery from the speaker’s perspective because it has been a fair part of my education. I didn’t however expect the speaker to refer and think of herself as God - literally. I believe she added that we are all Gods. Of course my mind could have got stuck from listening further. When she spoke of a higher power I was curious if she was speaking about herself. Another time she stated that we are all dopamine junkies. I won’t go into spirituality vs religion or talk about dopamine because I have written about it all in depth for you throughout the years. However, I have provided you with what was provided to me from a friend who worked with Toronto Police years ago while I was in my first career. This “bang head here” hung in my first career locker and then in my second. I didn’t have need for it again until after listening to this speaker talk. A recovering alcoholic, I give her credit that this has all probably worked for her to stay sober and I am pleased for her. However, to present this as an education piece is probably worse that when a Psychologist with a Phd, stood at the front of the classroom saying how we have two brains (she wasn’t laughing). What she was talking about is the two hemispheres of the brain. Again, I have discussed the brain and all of it in my previous blogs. She was teaching at a private school, I am pleased to say and not at a university. However, she made more sense than what I heard in this webinar. This speaker also talked about the steps of AA, but I didn’t know that until another member asked her if that was what she was talking about. I had to look at this speaker’s qualification and she is a certified addiction counsellor. I breathed a sigh of relief. I still feel it is a bit scary to elevate oneself to that of God. But what can I say? I took the rest of the day off, with an unexpected headache after listening to what the speaker spewed. I relaxed by watching Agatha Christie’s Hercule Poirot “The Adventure of the Italian Nobleman.” My suggestion to you is if you ever hear a speaker claim he or she is God - run. However, if you cannot run, feel free to make use of my “bang head here.” Tonight I am attending another webinar. This is from my local sisters in crime. The speaker is a Toronto Police Forensic Detective who will informing us of his 2008 journey to Afghanistan to teach local lawyers basic forensics. Normally, at the end of the day I am too tired for anymore webinars or lectures but this is just too good to pass and I did take off the afternoon after listening to God’s impersonator. My next topic for you is child sexual abuse which was also inspired by this month’s psychology today.

Mindfulness - Not without risk

Mindfulness has become the popular thing to do for self care, yet it is not new. I remember as a teenager our high school went to a retreat centre in Guelph and we spent the day focusing on self care. I remember all of us laying on the floor and told to focus on different parts of our body from our scalp down to our toes until we were all well rested. Or were we? In health psychology our professor did the same, only this time we were seated, at the beginning of our class. This time I did feel relaxed. With a busy schedule of work and school it provided me with time out. He gave us a handout of the exercise (15 min) and I use it for clients when I think they can benefit from it. It is not counted for hours by our College of Psychotherapy. In grad school, we were in the chapel and an Aboriginal classmate nun and friend I liked to have coffee with, worked with mindfulness and demonstrated on us. This time, it bothered me. I did not like the sensation. I didn’t know why. I couldn’t understand it and decided that it was because I didn’t like the sensation of not being in control. I stopped following her instructions and my mind returned to the present. Now years later, I wouldn’t mind talking with my old schoolmate to learn more of what she is doing and how it affects her clients. Years later when I was speaking to someone who had practiced mindfulness at a clinic told me she had stopped because it disturbed her. I shared this info with a physician while riding an elevator with him in my office building but he was so adamant about its positive effects that he didn’t think there was any possibility of negativity. He couldn’t get away from me fast enough. That had become his main business. So, when I was reading my Psychology Today Nov/Dec 21 edition, the caption “A downside to mindfulness” p 8, caught my immediate interest. I shall share this with you because I found that not everyone knows there can be a risk. The article written by Christopher Bergland reveals that mindfulness may trigger harmful side effects more often than people think. He provides two studies. 8% of one study found that feelings of anxiety was most common, followed by depression and cognitive anomalies such as confusion or disorientation. Instances of suicidal ideation, though rare, accounted for 11% of reported adverse events. In the second study, 58% participants in an eight week mindfulness trial reported at least one negative side effect, such as insomnia, anxiety, or dissociations; 37% of these found that the side effects interfered with functioning. 6% most often related to dissociation, lasted more than a month. A small amount had to stop the treatment. I don’t know how many participants were in this study, or who the control group consisted of. There is a lot missing of the actual studies. However, it is enough to have me raise caution to the wind. I do tell clients that this doesn’t work for everyone because I have seen that it doesn’t. I also know that for many it does work. However, I never read that it could cause harm which has now come to my attention. I will be mindful of the risks. As a therapist, I utilize all I have learned to help the client achieve his or her goal. Sometimes, during therapy what actually bothers a client is not what the client thought it was. Therapy can have someone step outside of themselves to safely look at themselves and explore what is bothering them, what is keeping them from being happy, from moving on. Sometimes all we can do is have the client be less sad. I know that I am not a miracle worker. I do the best I can with all my education, knowledge, experiences etc…but most of all I want to do no harm. What do you think? Have a good weekend. Keep safe.

The Internet Murders - continues

“Sandra was dreaming again. She was running, the dark figure never far behind her. Her heart could not bear to beat any faster. Philip walked into the room and realized that Sandra was having a nightmare. She was moaning and moving back and forth. He was wondering whether he should wake her when the red-haired nurse walked in. “She is beautiful, isn’t she?” The nurse commented casually, not expecting an answer, as she examined the solution in the bag draining fluids into Sandra. Sandra became still. Whatever she had been dreaming must have come to a close, because she stopped moving, and her face relaxed. “Just a coincidence, her being so still suddenly; she is alive,” the nurse said softly, smiling at Philip. Philip knew that women found him attractive, especially when he was in uniform. Women liked to feel protected, and his presence always made them feel safer. It was not only his physique. Philip stood tall at six feet two and was muscular and firm at 210 lbs. The contrast of his darker skin colour and green eyes made most women just want to look at him. His eyes derived from his mother’s gene pool. He had also inherited the softness of her nose and lips. From his father, he inherited his square jaw and powerful physique. His skin colouring was a blended mixture of his mother’s fair skin and his father’s dark skin. His mother would tell him that his skin tone of mixed batter of their favourite peanut butter cookies. He was just perfect. Their perfect child. He loved his mother more than life itself. She wanted grandchildren, but that was the furthest thing from his mind. He wanted to focus on his work and studies. The nurse was staring at him. “You have the most beautiful green eyes.” “My mother is from Sweden. Her entire family is fair-skinned with blue eyes except for her. She has green eyes. She used to tell me that her eyes were green because they were meant for me.” “And your father?” She asked curiously. He was a professor at Queen’s University. He taught English. He had a massive heart attack when he was 49. He didn’t make it.” “I’m so sorry.” Excerpt From: Silva Redigonda. “The Internet Murders.” iBooks.

Psychology Today reports: “People with disabilities are often made to feel as though their bodies are public property” (Dec 21, p 24-25)

I wasn’t going to write about this today. I wanted to refer to another article I read in the same magazine. Actually, there are quite a few articles that are interesting to report and discuss. However, this morning while watching the news, I saw a video of a man roughly being handled by at least two men, whom was being thrown out along with his service dog from a rib and other meat kind of restaurant in Milton, Ontario. I went to Milton years ago and it looked like I was going back into time. It has grown a lot since then and I only notice it when driving on the Highway. This man reported that he had produced proof that his dog was a service dog. I find it unbelievable that every day I hear some notorious act happening where it is not ok. In matter of fact it is criminal. People seem to being suing more and more which I remember only Americans doing but we have caught on and rightly so. I am surprised that the dog did not attack the men assaulting his owner because that is what I observed from my angle. I am curious to see what is going to be explained here. So, that is why I am going to talk about the article regarding disability as discussed in this article: Dean has a movement disorder and is often asked by strangers what is wrong with him. Strangers ask him personal questions on a daily basis, make fun of him etc….These are strangers asking what happened to him, was he born that way etc….The article written by Karen Stoliznow, Ph.D, states that there is a tendency and entitlement to ask these personal questions and to expect answers. The article continues with comments such as “you look so normal; are you really disabled?” One veteran responded to an employee asking, “How do we know you are even disabled?” His response was that he was blown up in Afghanistan and he pulled up his pants showing his prosthetic limb. The article indicates that the rate of violent victimization of people with disabilities is 2.5 times higher than without (USA Department of Justice). The article ends with disability etiquette which in my words are “it is none of your business.” In the writers more etiquette words respect the privacy of people with disabilities but does state that “their personal information is none of our business, unless they want to share it.” She indicates that most people have good intentions and don’t wish to be offensive, but this can all take an emotional toll for the person being asked the question. This author’s book include On The Offensive: Prejudice in Language Past and Present. Years ago while working in my second career, I was near the Track and Field and I observed a man wearing the most remarkable running shoes. I had to ask where he bought them. I wanted a pair for myself. I was stunned when he showed me that he had a prosthetic leg. He spent about five minutes explaining the running shoe, costs etc…. He let me know that sorry, so sad, you can't buy them. Another time I was asked a question and I turned away from my car to face two men, one man’s face seemed ripped apart. I cannot remember what they were asking me but I replied casually. The man with the disfigured face started a conversation with me and I responded in turn. Never once did I ask him anything about what had happened to him. Never once did he volunteer on his own. I wasn’t a therapist at the time either. I had been shopping at a large hardware store. It must have been refreshing for the man to have a general conversation with a woman without showing any attention to anything else but the topic on hand. This is a good time to have a conversation with your child and yourself regarding what is appropriate. No one likes to be stared at negatively or to be horrified by a person’s disfigurement. We are all people with feelings and we all want to be loved and not dehumanized. As I end this, I wonder what I will hear on the news tonight about this restaurant in Milton. How are they going to explain this? Were the police called? Will this go to court and how much will he sue? Sometimes, people need a wake up call, that it is not ok to hurt others. Have a good weekend. Mine was very productive. I attended another Sisters In Crime event where I am learning more and more about the world of selling books. I must admit I prefer writing them than the business side of the house. You know I have two websites. www.silvaredigonda.ca and www.redigondapsychotherapy.com What do you think?

Seminars, meetings galore and exciting news from the University of Toronto Magazine, Autumn 2021

Since I wrote to you last, I saw clients, had some fun, decided to eat healthy and of course more webinars. I love my work. I love helping people for a living. I have done that for most of my working life and it is something I can do, while I have a well oiled functioning brain. I have been thinking of writing some case studies. I would be picking cases that can help others. I want to explore that more. Now meetings…..During my second career, I once asked a professor if he was going to attend a meeting I had to go to. He replied that everyone has an opinion and was not going. That stuck to my grey cells and I experienced that feeling in most of all the meetings I attended for the week. I also attended a webinar Saturday with a panel from out West. I cringed at what I heard regarding COVID. I won’t go into details or tell on the organization but suffice to say I am so glad that I have the resources I have from the two universities, I attended right here at home. I attended others but there is a gag order not to tell, so sorry, cannot spell the beans even though I don't think there is anything secretive. If people cannot be up to date now and able to separate science from fiction, then there is a problem Houston. On the news this morning a physician from Saskatchewan who had been transferred to an Ontario ICU died from COVID. I felt sad hearing that. Next topic: I have decided to eat healthy. Since COVID, I have indulged in all the foods I wanted without a care. So, now I have decided to eat healthier. That doesn’t mean cutting off any foods, but it does mean increasing fruits and vegetables etc….and choosing more selectively my bad foods for the day or week. I had no idea I was eating so much sodium, especially because I don’t use salt often. I have begun to read the contents and the amount of salt in foods which is crazy. I even picked up a small apple pie and put it back, because 50% was nasty stuff. When did this all happen? Because I am a vegetarian, I usually buy veggie burgers, veggie hot dogs etc…..Did you ever read the contents of that suff? By the time I reached the cashier, I asked if she knew how hard it was to eat health food? She nodded. “You can’t find anything.” I exclaimed. She nodded knowingly. I wondered why they don’t have an identity tag for health foods so you don’t have to read all the data. Oh, wait a minute, they did and it is no longer available. I guess there was a fee for having it and there was still nasty stuff in the contents. Fortunately in undergrad, I had to study this in one or two of my courses and it is a good thing I was paying attention. I remember insinuating to my professor that pizza must be healthy because it has so many vegetables. She looked at me, shook her head and said, cholesterol. I was hoping that had changed and thought I would go to the counter where they sold slices of pizza. “Anything healthy here? Low in fat? The young teen, looked at me and shook her head, knowing this was one customer she wasn’t going to get to serve. So, I went to the pastry counter and bought a tiny dessert which listed 200 calories for one. It didn’t display what was in it, but what the heck. Like I said I am not giving up everything. I am just not eating everything. I have never noticed a change in my scale but then I hadn’t been to the gym so my muscles must have evaporated and thus, since muscle is heavier, I thought I was good. Nadda, one test revealed, and so I am on a slow mission to returning to my old self. I also miss the gym and haven’t returned since COVID. Yesterday I looked longingly at a piece of equipment. I would never have the space for that in my home. Maybe it was the right time to return to the gym. I can’t wear a mask while working out. This morning the news said we were entering a fourth wave. Ok, so no gym, but really, big businesses start providing us with health food. I need to eat. On a more positive note, I was reading an article from my old University of Toronto, magazine fall edition. Page 1 began with “Second Skin.” There is a surgical tool being developed from researchers at the University of Toronto and Sunnybrook Health Sciences. The device is a kind of 3D printer for skin which will be used to lay a sheet of biomaterial over a patient’s burn site. Biological ink (contains a kind of stem cell) will then be dispensed to accelerate the healing process. The article continues that with big burns you don’t have enough healthy skin available which can lead to death of the patient. Prof Guenther envisions surgeons being able to use the device in operating rooms in the next few years. Reading that piece made my day. Now that is progress! How was your week?

Body Shaming is not ok

Recently I was at a gathering where a woman told me that she was too busy to eat. I mentioned that she should make the time to eat. Another woman walking by, looked at the woman I was talking to and said she was fat and doesn’t need to eat. I have to admit I was stunned. I told the woman who made the remark, that it wasn’t nice and asked if she was perfect. I realized I had challenged her. She paused, said no and continued walking away. The woman whom the remark had been directed to asked what happened. I told her nothing had happened and that it had been taken care of. I don't know if she had heard the comment but if she did, she pretended not to. I realized I could have dealt with that more kindly. I say that because my tone was rude as well. This morning I pondered at what had occurred. I have a low tolerance for bullies. I don’t normally see this type of behaviour but I realize that for one too many abuse is suffered and tolerated by others who witness it. I have provided psychotherapy for people who suffer, and have suffered by body shaming. Others, feel poorly about their bodies when only they see every possible inkling of what can be wrong. Then there are those who like to chastise others because they think they know more of what is best for others which includes how they should look, what make-up to wear or not, what weight they should be, what clothes to wear etc……I normally encourage clients to be who they want to be, dress how they wish, and for those suffering body shaming both men and women, to be nude in front of a full mirror and tell themselves that they look beautiful. There are those who are so beautiful but who do not know it because they have been convinced otherwise. This can stem from their own parents who should be protecting them, loving them and making them feel safe, not shaming them. It comes from the bullies at school who taunt them to the point where they may commit suicide. It comes from a partner who demands their own idea of perfection, in a partner. This is all emotional abuse and from what I hear from clients who have suffered physical and emotional abuse, it is the emotional abuse which is the most painful. You don’t know the suffering of others which may be very concealed by the outward appearance and humour. I have people break down in tears because they do not know who they are because others have dictated to them all their lives. Sometimes, people don’t return because they are not ready to take a stand against their abusers. Sometimes their abusers stop them from getting help. However, ultimately it is up to those who suffer to make the decision if they will take that stand. We need to have the resources for people to get the help they need which starts in elementary school. Sometimes, I see with families that it is not the child but parents who need to make changes to deal with their own issues which is blamed on the defenceless child. I often have to ponder in families if parents are abusive or just poor parents. Again, anyone can have children without qualifications. Abuse can be stopped and abusers, abuse because they can. Some are quite gifted in being quite pleasant in hurting others, which is passive aggressive. When someone is loud and obnoxious, it is a no brainer. What happened when the woman walked by and called the lady fat and that she shouldn’t be eating reminded me of how much my mother used to protect children who were being bullied by other children. A group stuck one child in a garbage can and taunted the child. My mother removed the child from the can and struck the bully by shoving him away. I informed my mother after she told me what had happened, that if the police had been called, she could have been charged for assault. “But it isn’t right” she said. She was right. It wasn’t right and it isn’t right, but we must remember that there are laws in place as well. I know of a retired principal who started a safe place in her high school, where teens could congregate, and many who had felt that they were bullied for one reason or another, for being different, found that safe. I think all schools should have a safe place and bullies need to be educated to stop their behaviours. Their parents should be called in because there are times that there is where the bullies learn how to bully, hate, etc…. But what I also see is how children learn what is wrong even when their parents don’t. So, next time you see someone bully another, if it is safe to do so, make a comment that it is not ok. If it is not safe or you fear that you will be the next target for trying to help another, then report it to an organizer, teacher, employment resource etc….There is so much needless suffering going on. It is more powerful to be kind and reach out to someone. If you are one who body shames others remember that you do not know what is going on. It can be a body type, a physical problem which causes weight gain or loss, medication, and for some food is the only control they have in their lives when they feel they have none. Therapy can help and does. So, next time you see someone who does not meet your definition of your own projection of how a body should look like, take a look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself why you think it is ok to demean others. Think about what you say to your own children which can be demeaning. The City of Toronto helps with programs for guiding parents in rearing young children. What do you think?

Another Hallowe'en - Fun times

This Hallowe'en was nice. I got more kids than last year but less than previous years. I got about 70 kids who came trick or treating and they were very cute. What surprised me this year was how polite they were. Is this another generation of hope, I pondered? My city seems to be increasing in the gangs and violence and I am sure a lot of it has to do with our very lax laws and punishment. So, when I saw these delightful children coming for their treats it was a nice break so to speak. Their costumes were wonderful as well. I had one clown who seemed to be from a Stephen King novel and as she or he came towards me, a little child who was about to get her treat, saw the clown, screamed and ran away. "Don't you want a chocolate?" I shouted. Nope. The clown just raised the mask visibly surprised at the reaction. "I like clowns," I muttered. The clown was still looking at the little girl with an amazed expression and the little girl was still running. One of my neighbours across the street had a Myers face mask on from the Friday the 13th series and I must admit when there were no children coming for treats, I was mezmorized by the realistic mask. He would hold still and scare the kids when they approached thinking him not a real person. Another neighbour across the street would yell out and scream that he didn't want to give his candies away. It was quite a show in the neighbourhood. I didn't recognize all the costumes and the children did try to educate me. Two were kind of scary because I had watched a horror movie and I recognized the mask. It was based on a true story so I was a tad unsettled, until the next child came. All in all it was quite a night and I was more generous with my treats this year. Each child got a Costco popcorn package, some cheetos and a chocolate bar. Some didn't like one treat and were not afraid to say so. I actually found this interesting and good. These little children were quite honest and self assertive. I wondered how many would become the next generation of comedians, lawyers and politicians. At nine, it was over and one of my pets was so mad at me, that he refused to sleep with me, "Mr Attitude." He sat behind me against the glass door not pleased at all that I remained outside the entire time. It was slightly cold but not as bad as previous years so I was quite comfortable with a Costco jacket on. Overall, I was quite impressed with the next generation. Happy Hallowe'en.