Domestic Abuse

I have another week to go and then I am taking holidays and back to work 5 Jan 20. I will still be writing but writing in the Christmas Spirit or holiday spirit. I am taking a break from psychotherapy. But today I want to continue with the Conference I attended and will probably add tidbits from other sources. I want to talk about Domestic Violence. Severe violence happens to one in four women. One in seven are men. Severe violence is being struck with a fist, beaten, slammed against. There is physical violence, sexual - forcing sex. Abuse is also emotional - harming self worth or emotional well-being - domination, degradation, constant criticism, continual blaming, isolation, economical (Financial ) control, property damage, jealousy etc… Theoretical - holding sexist attitudes, seeing or being a victim of violence as a child - Having insecure attachment platforms - Not having a job or other events that cause stress. Secondary violence - using drugs or alcohol esp. drinking heavily. Depression and Trauma. Q+A: Usually hit in the face. Couple Therapy - negotiation. Determining if couple therapy is safe/possible. Dr Gunnur Karakurt, Phd. Reporting Issue: not sure of exact number of male victims. Not many seminars for men. They go to Emergency. May not be believed by Police. Few studies - emotional abuse. Male victims did not report separately. Not known what treatment is available for men. So far not really out there, maybe one or two. Health Correlates of Violence: Victims/survivors - PTSD, Depression, Anxiety, substance abuse. Treatment: Domestic violence shelters/educational program supporting victims/survivors. Group therapy: High drop out rate unintentional consequences, evidence minimal on the effectiveness of these interventions. Treatment is focusing on the whole person by improving mental health issues, safety and support. My input. I still owe you about domestic abuse which will eventually come. It is true that there is a focus on battered women and much less of men being abused. As a therapist, I too have been chastised for having an interest in protecting men. However, I have worked with men all my life in an environment that was mostly men and though I have met men who I have little use for even outside of work, whom I have tolerated because they were married to people I like, they have been the minority. I have had wonderful friends who are men and wonderful mentors who are men, mainly because my interests were careers traditionally chosen by men. Times are changing. I have provided psychotherapy for both women and men who have been abused from childhood times to the present. For women who have had different level of abuse from their partners report that psychological abuse was worse than the physical abuse they sustained. They lose their self worth and self esteem and we work to have them regain a truer sense of self. Beautiful women think they are ugly because they have been told so many times. Imagine having life start with sexual abuse as a mere child and have it continue to adult hood with various partners. Can you break the cycle? Yes, but it takes time. There is much to talk about this topic. But not today. Talk soon.