A Date with Prejudice

I deal with a lot of pain and suffering that people have. Recently, I was asked about the age demographics and etc I have dealt with…by my old Professor and now friend while we were having dinner. I am fortunate that I live in a multi cultural city, have travelled and have experienced being in company with almost every religion, culture and nationality. Are they differences in the problems? I was asked. My answer was simple, I have dealt with people from children, teens, twenties to 90’s in one capacity or another. People are generally the same. Some may have problems that are more relevant to them due for an example living in another country with different values which causes friction when there is a preference for another style, by the parent or spouse etc… People coming from another country where women are subservient, discover a voice and become empowered. Of course that will cause friction in a family where an imbalance of power was the norm. Lack of communication is another big problem, and a major one. Everyone thinks they are right and the other is wrong and often they each look at the therapist to find validation regarding this. However, when it is a couple, it is they who have to learn how to communicate with each other to determine what it is each wants and how they can achieve that. Some couples can do that on their own; others cannot. I provide only the tools. Each person needs to decide what he or she wants, is willing to change or naught. My professor, I think of him as my professor even though I am a post grad, is still teaching me about the goodness in others. Being in his company is like drinking goodness. Being with him is like having a conversation about hope and making this earth a better place. It is a discussion of the complexity of humanity. It is positive. Last night however, I had a date with prejudice. I forced myself to not fall asleep while I heard repetitious stories of the importance of each grandchild, uncle, of their status in life, travel etc….That just bored me to tears because I do not know these people even though I understood the psychology of the person needing to say all that was being said. Then came the prejudice, the hatred of different skin colour (which is only pigmentation. How do people not get that?). Hatred increased to a specific religion and then I felt that I was no longer being bored to death, I was being poisoned. I could not wait until the torture was over and this time I did not even bother trying to rationalize the hatred. It was too deep, too engrained, too much kept in check, while in the company of others. As I left and felt the cold air hit me, I returned gratefully to the warm comfort of my nineteen year old car who cannot understand why I do not allow him to vote. As I drove along the side streets, the poison I had been fed, slowly dissipated as the beauty of the Christmas lights cleared a path for me. It was a struggle to go home without looking at all the lights. I feared I would hit someone, even if the streets were bare, except for the glow of beautiful lights - the lights of hope. This night, our last night of the year, I shall dance away all the negativity, all the poisons I will shed the old and tomorrow I shall begin again with new experiences, new associates and new hope. I see a future where countries unite so that no child will ever have to go to sleep hungry or alone. I see a world where there will be peace. I see a world where poison will be replaced by something positive to improve rather than destroy. We are all responsible to make our world just a little bit better and more fun. So tomorrows New Year Resolution for me is to have more fun, dance more and be able to deal more appropriately with poison in whatever dose. What do you think? Happy New Year!