Last night, I did it. I had my own party. A few were sick and could not make it and I understood that perfectly. That is how I ended the previous year. This flu is still around. I invited family and very close friends and a few people who I really like. In planning a party in the winter, I need to curtail the amount of people, I would normally invite. Priority – family and best friend. My best friend has been so since I was eighteen and he 17. That has been a problem at times in my life because a few men I dated could not understand that bond. The priority if and when given the ultimatum has always been my best friend. We are both older now and time is our friend. He has quite a large family and runs an excellent business. I am so proud of him.
How do you know if you have a successful party? You know it, when people leave smiling and laughing and when people leave feeling relaxed.
I have never picked my friends by what they do, or how educated they are. I could not care less. What is important to me is their heart. That includes relatives.
One guest was asked what she did for a living, by another. Nothing she said, I take care of my family. That is not nothing, I interjected. I also reminded her of her earlier, impressive, career and she reminded me of the business she had. But, her priority has been her family and she can afford to stay home and take care of her family. Choices are for ourselves to decide.
I once told an elderly homemaker, that she was a dying breed. This woman could cook up an amazing meal within a short time. Her home was always sparkling. I told her that she was a dying breed. There is almost an expectation that women need to do it all. Be a wife, daughter, mother, homemaker and career woman? I could never be that super woman. It has to be 50/50 all the way and I would prefer less of 50, for myself. If, that cannot be accomplished, than hire someone to do that. That is where I stand firm. I am no super, girl at all. Being a home maker or house wife or stay at home, whatever you want to call it is not a luxury. I remember a male friend of mine who stayed home with his boys, while his wife worked at a lucrative career. He realized in no short time that it was hard work, and after a few years are this hard labour, returned to the work force.
Where do you stand in these positions? How do you select your friends? How do you select which relatives you socialize with? Do you choose their station in life, their salaries, and their kindness? Big choices? Are you alone? Why? What can you do, to start meeting people? What can you do to choose more positive people in your life? Who would you invite if you were giving a party? Why? What do you do for a living? How educated are you? More important are you where you want to be in life? What can you do, to get there? Make new friends, take a closer look at who you are living with. Are you happy? Are you abused? What can you do to make your life a better one? Do you need help getting there?
Yesterday, I had a friend call me before the party. “Do you want me to come earlier, to help?” No, it is all done, I informed him, adding that I was reading a book. He laughed. It was an endearing laugh. I added that he could still come early if he wanted. I had a perfect day yesterday. I spent my alone time, in my own company, which I really cherish. I spent time alone with my pets, and I spent that quality time with family and friends knowing that I am loved and I love. We all need love. Do you love someone? Are you loved? Love is not abusive. Some people only have known abuse and do not realize there is something more. I assure you, there is. Are you feeling so desperate that you want to die, or kill or hurt? Please do not. Find someone to help you. It is possible.
I have been told by my mentor that I am solution focused. I never thought much of it, but I suppose I am. If someone is not happy, than perhaps they need to realize why they are not? Perhaps they need to have some help understanding how they got to feel that way and how they can, by understanding and perhaps changing their own behaviour to achieve their own goals and not someone else’s. Life is so short and it can be so wonderful.
Prior to my party, my mom informed me that my life has been an adventure. I suppose it has been, and what an adventure. Perhaps I want to help people, because I want to have them sense a bit of that wonderfulness. I am thankful for each moment that I breathe, that I live, that I love. What are you thankful for? How can you get to where you want to be, rather than accept where you are? What do you think?
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