Peel Committee Against Woman Abuse. Continues……A Child’s Safety Plan and Violent Episode - Concludes and my concluding thoughts

Have your child choose a safe/room place in the house with lock and phone in the room. Have children get out of the room where the abuse is occurring. Emphasize the importance of being safe and that it is not the child’s responsibility to protect the mother. Teach your child how to call for help and not to do it in front of the abusive parent as it may place them at risk. Teach your child how to use a cell phone, or go to a neighbour. Teach them how to contact the police. Children should learn their full name and address. Pick a safe place to meet outside the home after the situation is safe. During a Violent Incident: Remind yourself of your emergency plan. Get out and call 911. Try to move to a space where the risk is lowest. Use your code name with your children so they can call for help. When or after you are assaulted call 911. Make as much noice as possible so neighbours may call police. I have taken the salient points above to address. Abusive partners may come across as very personable to others while they try to gather information. I cannot stress enough that the police are there to protect you. Often people who are abused are convinced by their abusers that the police cannot be trusted. They are trying to maintain their control. Should you have any questions please do not hesitate to ask. This plan was designed by women for women. I help all people regardless of gender etc.....This plan can help anyone who needs it, even if it provokes thoughts. Last fall when I attended the men's conference, an American man spoke about his abuse suffered by his physician wife. When the police came they couldn't take it seriously and yet he was almost killed. The man was trembling as a result of the trauma he had sustained which I see more frequently in women. I told him that I take all forms of abuse seriously and that he should have complained about the police if they did nothing. He actually did afterwards. There has been some anti police attitudes within the last years and I have seen the damage it does. Police are there to enforce laws that society deems necessary for the safety of all. It can be difficult for emergency services to consistenly be exposed to the ugliness of what people do. That is why it is very important for them to step back and contemplate what is happening around them and themselves. Self care is so important. The police are consistently scrutinized and therefore they often feel pressure. There are so many out there who become emergency response people because they actually love people. I have been one of those. There is much to gain for criminals to convince others how horrible the police are. Abusers are criminals and domestic situations are very serious and very dangerous. If you see anyone being abused call the police. It can be very dangerous if you interfere. The police are trained how to deal with these characters. Remember that a parent is responsible for protecting their child and if the child is not protected than authorities need to be notified. As a therapist I am obligated and regulated to report child abuse. Surround your self with nature, take time to reflect your own future. Be mindful of the honeymoon effect which I have written about in the past. No one has the right to try to control anyone else. People are not property and neither are children.