International Families Alliance Webinar Series: Legal Perspectives: Challenges and Strategies on High Conflict Separation. (For Men)

Last night I attended this webinar which focuses on the protection and rights of men. Now some of you reading this will be confused. How can I be concerned about men if I am concerned about women? Simply put, I am concerned about everyone. My experiences with men have been positive. Men have for the most part been my greatest supporters. Since I was a child I was surrounded by men. My mentors have all been men. I grew up with men and I worked with men for most of my life. Yes, some I could have done without, but that only taught me to play nice with others, even when I didn’t want to. We are a product of our all that we have been exposed to and then some. In the fall I will be attending the Men’s conference in Toronto. I am interested in men and their well being. Don’t get me wrong. There are some men I simply can’t stand but need to tolerate. That tis life. I stayed with the webinar last night for an hour and a half as scheduled. Mr Attitude is not happy when I work nights and neither am I so I stayed on schedule. When I left they were talking about PTSD and one lawyer was telling a man that he should get a therapist who won’t write notes because that was his concern. That surprised me because as a Registered Psychotherapist I am obligated to take notes. So let’s get this straight. I am obligated to report, if I believe a client will commit suicide. I have to believe it however. In my career I have heard endless times how someone wants to die without really meaning it. If I believed it, I would report it immediately. I also have to report if my client is going to harm someone. I have to report child abuse. I also have to attend court if subpoenaed. That is the law. I take notes. It is required. However it was not my webinar. Now keep in mind that I am in Ontario. I am regulated. There are provinces in Canada that have no regulations. So, lets get back to the webinar. The same lawyer was bashing a psychologist in court because she wasn't forceful enough. Now, I am not going to say that this lawyer belongs in a different era. What I will say is the psychologist was right. There is no agenda. I have been asked to go to court for clients and I have refused and will probably continue to say no. Why? Because when I see a client and see a client with his or her partner, same gender or otherwise and when I see the family dynamics when family members come aboard there is a constant shift of tension or otherwise. More things come out. There is anger and other emotions which at times come out which open core issues before there is healing. So I don't think it would be fair for me to go to court in favour of one person and that is what I have been seeing in the courts. I don't care who pays me. What I found beneficial is that there are five support groups for men virtually. I found the men on the chat line very open about their feelings and willingness to help other men facing the same problems. One of the lawyers was stating that men have it tough. He suggested that if a man is found not guilty in criminal court to let them know in family court. There is also “hybrid” which didn’t exist during my time. An offence was either Summary or Indictable (more serious). Now hybrid can be either, depending on the Crown. If you want to appeal the decision you can go to superior court. Feel free to ask the clerk what to do. I also didn’t know that in Barrie Ontario, the superior and provincial court are in the same building. Have a nice day.