Reflection of a particular theological course

Final Learning Report Silva Redigonda 1. My preparation for class has changed throughout the semester. I now, except for this week because I have a book to skim, two papers to do, and two prayer services to prepare, have always given my Trinity readings priority. I sit alone at home to read, reflect and digest. I need to read slowly, and I need frequent breaks. Of reading alone, I have spent 25 plus hours (excluding breaks and assignments. This week’s reading is not included). I always note questions as I read and I have come to a complete understanding of my view of the world. I know nothing. I always ask questions in class and I have so many more questions to ask. Each day I fill my head with even more questions and ponder. I am tired and wish to be free from thinking or asking questions. I want to just sit and not think and I try do that each morning and evening as I look out at nature. I can just marvel. 2. I think I am fully involved in class. Readings stir up questions and I relate the readings to life and to other readings from other classes. I have learned and am still a novice that some things need to be read and experienced differently. I listen attentively to what other students say and think. I hope that I have been respectful of classroom etiquette. I always learn from others. That seems to be a weekly if not a daily learning, inside the class room and out. 3. I have learned that I need so much more to learn and yet my schooling is almost over. I have heard students say they are happy this is at the latter part of their studies but I wish it was my first course at Regis. It would have taught me to slow down, rather than rush. I am incorporating three programs and may be completed in another full school year. I feel that this course has whispered that I need to slow down and fully inhale my theological learning. More specifically from this course, I have broadened my concept of the Holy Spirit as part of the Trinity. I have always had a sense of the Trinity. I have never thought of the Holy Spirit using the concept of a verb and it is by thinking this way, I have come to a better understanding of the Holy Spirit. I am annoyed when a priest does not try to explain the Trinity in church and just calls it a mystery but I have a much more understanding and therefore a compassion for a priest who will not be able to do so. I now can more fully appreciate the Trinity as three in one and one in three and feel confident about it. I have in the past felt that Jesus as Son was perhaps a bit less than God as Father and that has diminished. I have a full appreciation of equality, one in three and three in one. Thank you. 4. What forever remains unclear for me is evil. I have mentioned it several times in class and I had a wonderful confirmation with the “filtering”. I just feel that there is still a lot of focus on God and not on evil and yet evil is so prominent in society. I know we discussed our free will and God letting us make our choices, but there is still something missing for me. Of course we are focusing on the Trinity and that may be the reason. There was a question that came to me in my readings that indicated the concept of three in our lives, but I see two. I see polarization of day and night, hot and cold, positive and negative and etc…. I wonder at the significance of this. I also ponder how much is truth and how much is politics and/or philosophy? What is the source of this struggle? I am a creature. As I looked at my pets this morning and lovingly called them my little creatures, I tried to imagine my love for my pets as God loving me (note: I imagined animals because they are who live with me and not humans). How magnetized am I as a creature for God as my pets are little creatures to me, who fight with each other and then sleep together. I think they know not what they do and forgive them their ignorance. So much is forever confusing and unclear. 5. One new question and area of investigation for me is due to our contemplative prayer session in the chapel. Initially, I was quite open and positive by the experience and then I began to feel uncomfortable and shut out my openness. I would like to explore that eventually. I say eventually because this year and next will be extremely busy for me and if it does not arise in any classes, I will have to wait til my studies are over to explore that venue. In the meantime, I pray by directly speaking to God as Father or Jesus as Son and asking the Holy Spirit for grace.