Oh Boy, Thoughts of the week (my web site www.silvaredigonda.ca is down) Taylor Swift is in Town and the Good, bad and Ugly are hard at work.

Well, I did attend a webinar last Saturday held by Susan Chuang, a professor at Guelph University. As always it was interesting. I wrote notes and will start providing that for you next week if everything returns to normal sooner rather than later. Of course it is about family. Next: I noticed yesterday that my site where I sell my books is down. Apparently my domain disappeared and now they are working on getting that back on line. It should take about 24 hours. I'll give them til Monday. I try to keep my weekends free from any kind of work or media. Note: Try. Work balance is very important and I am prone to having fun. Next: I was alerted yesterday that I am going to have a seven hour exam at the end of April. I have seven hours to complete it in one setting but I should be able to do it in four hours. Yeepeee, can't wait!!!!! Of course, they don't call it an exam. They call it a CBA. I will be provided with 30 situations, judgement cases and I believe the pass is 85%. They are trying to make it as stress free as possible. How nice. I hope all the colleges do that. They will be providing me with more information - how nice. This is all to protect you, the public. I was asked three questions. Would I be able to write the exam? Would I still be working? Or, three is there any reason I couldn't do it. Let me think? Don't want to? I don't think that is a good response. Retirement? Can anyone retire nowadays? OK, I'll do. There you go, now that is a sound judgement response. On a lighter note we have Taylor Swift in town. Our city counsellors who seem to be mostly Swifties, made a Swifty road sign which cost thousands to welcome her. My city counsellor objected. I have to make sure to vote for him. Counsellors called those opposed - haters. So, is this the solution statement now at city hall - Don't agree with a Swiftie fan therefore you are hater? I think Taylor Swift is a smart business woman and you have to be, to be a billionaire. She is always welcomed in my town. The news this morning reported that she is expected to generate 282 million dollars in our city. Hotels have marked up their prices 10 times (greedy. I don't think they should be able to do that. Niagara falls did the same thing and upset a lot of people during the summer eclipse). The Anti Fraud Centre reports that 184 Swiftie tickets were reported as being fraudulent (as of Wednesday). Not nice Fraudsters. These are kids you are ripping off. As far as I am concerned if Taylor Swift is in town and is making so many people happy, perhaps she should live here sometimes. Of course, we need to keep her safe because there are some actual haters out there. My town needs excitement with all the shootings going on. Fortunately, most don't know how to shoot and I am not going to be their instructor. Three Police Associations are protesting the Bail System and are asking the government for help. What would our city look like if the police went on strike? I would take a sabatical out of town. Yesterday there were some 23 people I believe arrested for shooting about a hundred rounds, including hitting an unmarked police vehicle. Our police heros were on the scene and arrests were made quickly. How do they accomplish that? Let's support our Police who do their best to keep us safe with so little. Oh, they are going to hire more police, naw, not to match the crime...silly. They are trying to replace the ones retiring. Now, I have two busy days ahead, so I think, I'll go shake it off.

Veterans Day - Poppy - No frills disappoints

Well, I did go. It was the first time I attended since I retired, with lots of drama. First as I drove to the cemetary I spotted a woman, I had seen chasing a Coyote a few days earlier. She was trying to film the poor beast, while he was trying to get away from her. I was concerned because the woman showed no respect for the animal as she was filming him and I was concerned that she was going to corner him. This time the woman was searching for him without success. It is no wonder that they are starting to attack. They have less land to feel safe in. A man saw my plates and asked me where I wanted to go and began removing the safety pods so I could drive through. What a guy! There was no way I would have been able to walk the distance that was cordoned off. I drove to the steps and parked where film crew and others were given priority. I managed the steps with one of my crutches and I was so glad I carried it with me. I found a beautiful tree and made it my resting place. I was asked a lot of questions and I wasn't expecting so much. One of the cemetery staff asked me if I wanted a chair and I accepted, thus losing my spot at the grand tree. During the service, an elderly woman fell onto the ground. Initially, I thought she had died, her eyes were wide open and still. She was with someone who was helping her and calling 911. For some reason, I called out that we needed a medic. For some reason two medics reacted but their equipment was in their vehicle. It is comical really because we all reacted as if we were still in the military. Why would I call for a medic? Fortunately, EMS were at the parade as well, so they responded immediately. Paramedics arrived and they all brought her back to life and of course I gave her my chair. What a woman! I would have gone to the hospital if I were her, just to be safe. However, she wanted to remain for the entire parade. I couldn't understand why there were not chairs for more people, especially the elderly who need to be there for reasons they alone have. I saw the VIP civilians come in their glory as well as the politicians, perhaps one and the same. One woman was insisting I have another chair and I insisted that she stop. OMG. After the service, I hobbled over to the coffee which I was really looking forward to. There I was approached by an MP who spoke of his ambitions. I marvelled at this new generation of hopefuls. I did tell him to be careful what he wished for (because I have seen so many lively and wonderful people going to war zones and returning different. I wanted more for this young striking man who has his entire life ahead of him.) After some discussion with him, I went to the cenotaph to compliment the young cadet who was so perfect in her role; and so much better than myself when I had to do that, which I shared with her. She informed me she wasn't a cadet, she was regular force. Boy, how long has it been? Then I was approached once again by a civilian woman wanting to know where I had been. I told her Europe, the Middle East and Canada, as I continued to go to the safety of my car. I hobbled down the steps and helped my leg into the car. I decided this would be my last parade. I went off to have breakfast with legion members and while they were going off to another parade, I decided to go home and then return. I did and spent most of the day at the legion where I heard the stories about the poppies. I had to admit I was so much in awe of these volunteers who give so much of their time for the causes of veterans. They have welcomed me so warmly and earnestly. Then the stories came. I shall call her Alaine, not her real name (I hope. I am bad with names). Her parents were both World War vets from England. They immigrated here and at the time, citizenship was automatic with Canada. I didn't know that had changed and wondered why so many things have to change and not always for the best. Look at us now. It appears with no surprise that her parents had suffered, due to the war. She later told me that "No Frills" at Black Creek and Eglinton had refused her to have poppies on the premises. She said she was so upset that she had to take a break before going to the next place and had to have a coffee to calm down. I felt really bad for her because I saw her pain. I don't go shopping there and Fortino's my grocery store has a poppy box at customer service. I always make a mental note of where they are because I keep losing mine. Then I heard from another member who had served, whom spoke of one man who gave him one hundred dollars and wanted only one poppy at the Eaton Centre two years ago. It was evident that he had appreciated the gesture. Then he talked about how wonderful the children are and that of course, gives me hope. I was given a Military Service Recognition book, Volume X1, and he wanted me to look at the pictures at the back of the book that children had drawn. The work is stunning. These children are so deep and their drawings are so amazing. What gifted children. He gave me a pen of a palace guard, hat and quilt - so cute. I have tried to go to England three times while I served and never did make it. Was it time? My hairdresser also went and I have been suppied with cookies and tea bags from the West Minister Palace since his return. I was also provided with an Afghanistan,

Lest We Forget pin (2001-2014). It rests against the following words, " Once again Canada was called upon to send our Canadian Armed Forces into battle. More than 40,000 soldiers served in Afghanistan. 2,179 soldiers were wounded. 158 soldiers made the ultimate sacrifice and thousands more will need assistance for years to come."

Thoughts of the Week - Rememberance Day - Rob Ford Thank you

Our Premier, Doug Ford has extended us Veterans and Military Personnel free access of the Go Train. I am grateful to him. Already there is a lot of hoopola about who didn't get it and why we don't get more, yada, yada, yata. I remember years ago and it is probably in my book that I went to Marine Land which is in Niagara Falls Canada and a sign stated that American soldiers could get free access or a discount I can't remember which (I have to read my book). That is the only time I got mad and spoke up. I did get that discount or freebie, because come on, we're in Canada and soldiers here were being dismissed in their own country? I know there are a lot of discounts in the States for soldiers and Veterans. Every time I go there I get discounts even in clothing stores. It's everywhere. We never did get anything at home. Perhaps times are changing. However, I am really appreciative and grateful that Rob Ford has thought enough of us to give us this. I think it is big. I know I was getting 25% off the train as well and so first class was appreciated. I never take things for granted. Recently I was listening to a person named Richard on the news representing the City of Toronto and I was disappointed since he sounded like he was dismissing women who served. He said men and a few women. I wanted to strangle him. If someone does, I assure you it wasn't me. I thought of all the WW2 Veterans I have met in my time whom were women. I think of all the deaths and suffering. I think of when I went to Dacho, concentration camp and saw the ground where two British Officers who happened to be women were tortured and killed. What would they think of Richard? Richard was so effective that before the interview was over the woman interviewer stopped saying women and just said men. That is all it takes. I haven't been to a Veteran's parade since I retired. I was about to once, but I wasn't a dignitary so couldn't get a parking space. I explained I was a veteran but I don't think he understood what that meant. However, since I joined a legion and have been encouraged to attend, I am debating. I will be donating my helmet and a few other items to the legion because I see how proud they are of what they have. I have donated some things to my old military school and also to my Chief who is now deceased. The military world is a paradox. There is a connection to all who have served. The only thing stopping me right now from attending is my right leg. Will I need to sit? How will I look if I lean against a tree? I found my beret which is still acceptable. I would have to wear my red running shoes which will match my beret. All things to think about. But what is most important to me is the military family and thoughts of all those who died so we can have the freedom we enjoy today. To all who have served. I love you. Have a good weekend and spend a moment to reflect.

Theology notes continues

Looking at connection between Jesus Resurrection - rest of the world. Jesus Historical resurrection - Overcoming evil God’s ability of victor over evil. Do you want to believe in God that allows to have his son die or resurrect? Abraham is stopped slaying his son that is the evil of all sacrifices. Redemption is the reversing of violence- wanting to be like God - compete with God Sin and Redemption - Jesus resurrection is hope of overcoming evil but it is also our resurrection. Definition of Prolepsis - anticipation. Anticipates the resurrection of everyone. Doubting Thomas - doubted Christ’s resurrection. Show me. Angels don’t have biological sensitivity. No distinction between knowing and doing - if they rebel, that is it. There is a revelation - New heaven and new earth - seems to suggest into the heavenly realm once and for all. Ratzinger is very concerned about the intermediate state. Jesus was separated from earthly body. Most Christians are naive. We think the soul dies. The body is snake skin. Skin immortal? There is a misinterpretation of body/soul separation. If it is not possible to separate how can they live on? If resurrecting right away, how are you going to preserve this? Razinger says this is intermediate state. Soul is in heaven while waiting for the resurrection of everyone. Dermont Lane said that resurrection of soul is imminent, second resurrection with coming of Christ. Vatican 1 had specific definition for dogma (inner knowledge of God which cannot be reasoned) therefore learned through revelation. Intermediate state is trying to understand the two. If don’t have free will in purgatory will need prayers. Apparitions of Mary - People in purgatory don’t have free will at all. soul - YUXN/y everything but the physical body. Interpreting the foundations of faith as context change. Life after death - different concepts of different religion. Soul is real; whole person is an organism (ideal), incongruence, biological {} psychological. Model is biological. Evolution has opened us to transcendence - genuine, unconditional warmth; empathy. Next (when we talk about theology) we are going to touch on spiritual direction

Good luck today America

Today is a big day and I want to wish my American neighbours good luck. I hope it is a good choice that will enhance the country. Every time I took a glimpse of what was going on, I only heard bashing. Unfortunately, we are experiencing much of the same. Wishing my neighbours the best! I have a glass of wine ready. I posted on X, which I can't seem to post here, a special comedy editon I watched most of last night (will watch the rest when I have more time). It's called this hour has 22 minutes. It's fun to watch so please don't take offence. If you don't have a sense of humour, you may want to skip it.

Canadian Health Care Workers - I cut and pasted this from EHN. You should be able to find their video if interested.

Morning, I thought this may be of interest to you. I didn't watch the video because there is nothing new here for me. However, feel free to look them up if you are interested. ​ Silva Redigonda ​ View in browser EHN Canada Logo - Horizontal - CMYK - Black-1 October 2024 Header Title HC_mental health IN THE NEWS Canadian healthcare workers’ mental health is in decline More and more studies are showing that the mental health of Canadian healthcare workers is reaching a critical point. In 2021, more than one in five health care workers logged overtime. Nearly half of family doctors report working beyond capacity according to the College of Family Physicians of Canada. The Ontario Medical Association says, “Physicians retiring prematurely, reducing their workloads, changing their scope of practice or leaving medicine entirely in response to burnout will exacerbate the situation for remaining physicians, resulting in a potential domino effect.” Paramedics, family physicians and respiratory therapists were the most likely to report working overtime at 45%, 34%, and 31% respectively. And Dr. Leigh Chapman, Canada's Chief Nursing Officer, said, “Nurses are the backbone of our health care system, yet too many in Canada are struggling with their mental health, experiencing burnout, distress and feeling overworked, and unappreciated, causing them to leave their jobs." Understanding the impact their work is having on them is the beginning of offering the support healthcare workers need. Healthcare_Therapist talking to client_HS WARNING SIGNS Caring for others while harming themselves. When we talk to healthcare professionals across Canada, one thing we hear from them again and again is their inherent drive to help people. The other thing we hear is how much their work impacts their own mental and physical well-being. Being on the frontlines of healthcare means witnessing the results of accidents and disease, and also being with patients in their final moments. While they are trained to deal with such challenging situations, healthcare professionals are still human beings who often cannot shake what they’ve experienced. It’s a phenomenon known as “vicarious trauma,” and it’s impacting between 40 and 85% of healthcare workers today. In addition, "compassion fatigue” is testing the limits of healthcare workers’ dedication to their work. This erosion of empathy often leaves workers feeling like they have nothing left to give. WHAT ARE SOME OF THE WARNING SIGNS OF VICARIOUS TRAUMA AND COMPASSION FATIGUE? Look for colleagues who are: Feeling drained, overwhelmed, or numb Showing difficulty empathizing or connecting with others Overly alert, anxious, or easily startled Increasingly frustrated or angry Experiencing nightmares or having trouble sleeping Suffering from frequent headaches, stomach issues, or other stress-related physical ailments Feeling unappreciated or questioning the purpose of their work Withdrawing from social interactions, friends, and family Unable to focus or make decisions To learn more about vicarious trauma, watch our webinar with Clinical and Forensic Psychologist Dr. Krystle Martin. Watch Webinar

Writer's Corner - Ominous - I got my worse review ever for my favourite book (that I wrote)

Yesterday, I was at a Hallowe'en luncheon which I enjoyed very much since I miss parties. One of the people came up to me and told me she insisted that her nephew read my book, "Hey Guy Buy Me." She told me that she had enjoyed reading it. I didn't remember that she had bought a copy. "Hey Guy" has been around for a decade since it was the first book I wrote. This year I published "Ominous" and I poured my heart into it so when I got the worse review ever and in such a mean fashion, I felt sad. I pondered if I should continue writing. But when I had that person approach me at the party about "Hey Guy Buy Me" which I wrote for fun and tell me how much she enjoyed it, I realized that I love writing. It is creative. I only took courses in English as a break from Psychology because English has always been my favourite subject. I would love to write stories in the kitchen while my mom was cooking up a storm of the most amazing food I have ever eaten. Of course I took her for granted at the time. But my mom was always my favourite fan. She encouraged me to sing and to write. You didn't know I could sing. Well maybe I can't anymore. When I would sing at home, Holy Terror would start screaming and jump onto my lap. When I stopped singing, she would stop yelling. Who knows maybe she was singing too? Doubt it. Anyhow, back to my writing. I was in grade seven when a mean teacher (I hated teachers until I went to university)with red furious hair and a reddish face (can still visualize him, uch) to match with an untrimmed mustache and a bulldozer appearance, told me I never wrote a piece I had submitted. He told me that I had copied it from a book. Insulted and never able to control my mouth, I told him. "Did too. You can ask my mom." Here I am a child in grade seven and some substitute teacher is telling me I am plagiarizing. That was my experience with creative writing. It was Toni Morrison who told her students to use their imagination when writing because they know nothing. That is what I do. I imagine. I am not trying to create a masterpiece. At a book sale, I had a woman excitedly approach me and ask if I did research writing my books. I said no and she hopped away. But am I being honest? "Hey Guy Buy Me" I wrote because of all the men I have worked with. I have had men love it or hate it, but I wrote if for fun people. Does it have errors? Yup. For Love of Country - Military Policewoman my worse critic said it was evident that I was a policewoman because I wrote it as a report. Ok. Fine. Did you like anything in it? Probably not. But what I like about "For Love of Country" is the feedback I get from people who have served. Every time they reach out and share their own journey's or opinions of how they suffered, that counts big time! I have a large segment of the Jewish community who usually buy my books at fairs and I hope I honour them in my books as I speak about the concentration camps. Then there is "The Internet Murders". My bad review there is that I write it as if I live in a town, which is not Toronto. This from a critic who very much lives in a town. I have lived in Toronto forever except for my service to my country. I think of Toronto as a town, which is why I love New York, now that is a city. However, I am sure that if I lived in New York City the same critic would complain. Really, is that the best you have to criticize? "Ominous" is my heart. So, when a critic tore it apart without even identifying herself, probably making her feel safe, it disheartened me at the time, but not for long. I am writing about this today because the writing community is so loving and supportive. I belong to the Crime Writers of Canada and the Sisters of Crime here in Toronto and the USA. I haven't been able to attend their luncheons or bar nights because I have so much on my plate that I have to prioritize and the writing part remains my hobby which I love. Of course if one of my books became a movie, it would cease to be a hobby, wouldn't it? Right at this moment I have to give priority to my private practise and endless meetings and eduation hours. I am not complaining but I do not write to be the next Hemingway. I read and enjoy books like Stephen King, Dean Koonz etc... spooky stuff. I am sharing this with you because I don't want young writers to be disappointed. When I have young writers approach me, they are so full of life and ambition and hope and I would hate to think that someone would be mean to them. You can certainly critique someone and be kind at the same time. Every piece of writing that a person has given me, I have read, though I tell them that I am not in a position to help them. So, this is how I feel. I still remember a writer criticizing a popular Toronto author whose books I enjoy reading. I could feel her venom and wondered where it came from? So, that is all for now in writer's corner. I have accomplished a lot of work this week and hope to return to my next book soon. I have been reading my poetry and papers as well and am trying to determine how I can encorporate it in my writing. I am looking forward tonight. Little monsters should be arriving. Happy Hallowe'en world.

Happy Hallowe'en

I had planned to provide you with more information this week but I guess I am not back to normal with time. Things change as well as time. So, please be patient with me. I am only one person. I have no team. I have a private practice and clients need to always be my priority since they are my responsibility. I have to attend meetings. As you know my injury has slowed me down and time spent at physio is usually a write off day. I have decided that I should also walk more to get to where I was. Driving is still a pain after 15 minutes and everyone has an opinion even those in the know. So, as usual, I gather all the info and then process the information into my brain cells. I have decided that I shall take expedition days (I have been reading my notes I wrote in my creative writing class which I enjoyed in my undergrad and the expedition days were fun where I went somewhere, observed people and wrote creatively.) However, this time since I was advised not to walk more than 15 minutes prior to my injury, which I ignored by building myself back up til I was feeling great and even dancing etc....until the muscle injury blah blah blah......Since my pain has almost gone and decreased to a level where I can work almost a full day, I want to take an expedition where I go to a mall, bring whatever book I am reading (for fun only) walk, shop etc....for about 15 or 20 minutes or + (less than a half hour) and then sit and read and of course be aware of my surroundings which includes watching people. I may use them as a character in a book or I may recognize them and have coffee. There is rarely a time if any that I don't bump into someone I know. I feel I am back in commission. I have also noticed two new high end Italian restaurants in my neighbourhood, I want to try out. I usually like to try something new. If I am really impressed I write it here for you. This is all good. I have been researching real estate in Niagara Falls and just yesterday at a meeting someone from St Catherines said I shouldn't go there because it is a Tourist town. She initially said she was from NIagara Falls (but isn't). I love Tourists. People from all over the world are interesting. There are many here in Toronto so I won't get homesick. She then said it was words to the effect - a dump. My reply is that I would inhance it (with my presence). The Falls is one of the wonders of the world and I can think of nothing better than taking a walk along the Falls and stop at Tim's for a coffee while I feast my eyes. If that is a dump please sign me up. Of course nothing is cut in stone. First I have to heal. Then I have to wait for a bidding war - one step at a time. Regarding property in Niagara, I find that prices are all over the place and many are starting to use Toronto Real estate people to sell their homes. I won't be using Toronto, no sireeee. I will be using Niagara Falls agents only for buying. Big decisions. Of course I am also considering waterfront Toronto condos. So, here I go dreaming again. Situations always change and opportunities cannot always be turned down. I am never in a rush to make big decisions. Happy Hallowe'en people. I had to miss a distant party which I heard was wonderful but will be attending at least one for sure here in the city. What shall I wear? Vanilla and my poppy.

ADOLESCENTS COPING WITH MOM’S BREAST CANCER: DEVELOPING FAMILY INTERVENTION PROGRAMS Silva Redigonda

INTRODUCTION Research Question: How are African American and Caucasian adolescents affected by their mothers’ breast cancer treated in the last two years? How do African American and Caucasian adolescents think future intervention programs should be designed? What are the aims of the paper? The abstract indicates that the purpose was to gain a deeper understanding of how adolescents are affected by their mothers’ breast cancer and to discover their opinions about how future intervention programs should be designed. But the introduction more specifically indicates that the purpose of this study is to elicit opinions from an ethnically diverse group of adolescents about the effects of maternal breast cancer on their lives and to discover their opinions about how future intervention programs should be designed. This may be construed as a contradiction. The paper under the heading of Aims of the Study indicates that “the purpose of this study was to investigate adolescents’ thoughts on and experiences with a mother who had been treated for breast cancer in the last two years.”(p 250) METHODOLOGY This is a pilot study which is a small-scale study conducted prior to conducting an actual experiment; designed to test and refine procedures. When the researcher has decided on all the specific aspects of the procedure, it is possible to conduct a pilot study in which the researcher does a trial run with a small number of participants. The pilot study will reveal whether participants understand the instruction, whether the total experimental setting seems plausible, whether any confusing questions are being asked etc..Such procedures provide the researcher with an opportunity to make any necessary changes in the procedure before doing the entire study. Reference: Cozby Paul, Methods in Behavioral Research, 9th ed. McGraw-Hill Comp. New York, 2007 pp 181-182, 383) I believe that the model used was the interpretive model. This stems from qualitative research. The study consisted of three focus groups according to the paper: The first focus group comprised of four Caucasian adolescents (gender not specified) but deduced from information provided as two females and two males. The second focus group had two African American females The third focus group comprised of two African American females and two African male adolescents. with a total of 10 adolescents ranging from 13 to 18 years of age (five males and five females consisting of four Caucasian and six African Americans). The six African American adolescents has been determined for focus group two and three. Of the remaining four adolescents who are Caucasian, we know that two are female. Therefore the remaining two Caucasian adolescents in the first focus group is male. The report indicates that the focus groups were “split” along racial lines with Caucasian and African American in each focus group. All the African American adolescents are identified as being in group two and three. Each adolescent has a mother who had been treated with a stage of 0 to lll breast cancer within the last two years. Six set of parents were married, one mother remarried and three African American mothers were divorced and single parents. Three of the adolescent girls (two Caucasian and one African American) had mothers who were initially diagnosed five to 15 years earlier. It is not specified if the mothers were Caucasian and African American the same as their children. Nor is it known which adolescent is connected to who’s mother. Therefore this study cannot be replicated. It should be noted that each adolescent indicated that the reason she/he was participating because of the mother’s encouragement. Did the teens therefore feel they were coerced? Two female moderators conducted each focus group. At least one moderator’s was matched with each participant group, that being Caucasian or African American. What was consistent is that one Caucasian moderator was in each of the three focus groups. Since there were two moderators in each group and one is African American then it can be presumed that at least two moderators, one Caucasian and one African American were in the study. Wording cannot conclude that there were not more than two moderators. Each focus group was provided with a guided discussion and seven questions pertaining to “parental cancer”. Questions were asked within the same order. This occurred between 2002 and 2003. More specific dates are not provided. Recurrent themes were determined and developed with a definition for each. These categories were derived independently by three of the five coauthors. To be classified as a major theme, at least one half of the adolescents interviewed (five) had to report such. RESULTS The four Caucasian teenagers two male and two females, who had mothers currently in treatment for stage II or III breast cancer responded with intense sadness, worries, and fears about their mothers’ prognosis. All six African American teenagers having mothers with stage 0, I and II breast cancer, minimized current worries or fears and stated no current concerns about their mothers’ breast cancer. All of the adolescent males seemed less expressive when asked about their feelings and ways of coping and relied more on distraction, keeping busy and athletics. The African American females tended to keep to their normal routines as much as possible, tried not to think about it, and were less expressive. The Caucasian females talked more about the importance of sharing their feelings with others, writing, and other mediums of expression. African American males and female tended to go to church more often and to pray daily to cope. All adolescents talked about seeing their mothers vulnerable during the cancer treatments. All were more affectionate and helped out by cooking, cleaning, shopping, washing clothes and protecting their mothers by making sure they were eating well and sleeping. The oldest adolescents in their families reported taking on the most responsibility at home during their mothers’ treatment. Parents often relied on the eldest to care for younger siblings and to take on additional household responsibilities. Adolescents coped with faith, humor, talking with others, distraction, thinking positively and keeping busy in athletics or other activities. Regarding support, all adolescents said having a teen group close to diagnosis (within four months) would have been an asset. They wanted to be fully informed sooner rather than later regarding the treatment, expectations, etc..It would be better to have a mixed group of boys and girls close to diagnosis and similar ages, don’t talk down to them, boys may not feel comfortable exposing their feelings with females present, female and male therapist at a younger age would have been preferred. Listen to the teenagers more; and have families come together as a group. Regarding “Research on how to help their children is absent.”(American Cancer Society, 2003).P 248. I contacted the American Cancer Society and they sent me the paper via email (www.cancer.org/docroot/STT/stt_0_2003. This paper has 52 pages. Yet the reference page was never provided. I did not see such reference as noted by the researcher. Does the Researcher therefore mean that she did not see the mentioned research in this paper? Pages 41 and 43 of the reference does offer resources and publications offering practical and emotional support for families. There are also books during the time of this research available for support. Note below. Coping with breast cancer, and helping your children do the same, is an ongoing process. If you want to read more about supporting children, some books you might find helpful are: McCue, K. (1994). How to Help Children though a Parent’s Serious Illness. St. Martin’s Griffin: New York. Harpham,W. (2004). When a Parent has Cancer:A Guide to Caring for your Children. HarperCollins: New York. There were assumptions which I think restricts the researcher in thought. All avenues should be open and disproved by evidence. For example “Although African American women have a 13% lower incidence of newly diagnosed breast cancer, as compared with Caucasian women, they have a higher death rate.” This is likely due……If the answers were posed as questions stemming from grounded research it would have deserved merit. Opinions are not valid for research. There are too many factors to consider. Chapter five of our text indicates that if a group has fewer than 6 people it can be hard at times to generate a diversity of ideas (focus groups in this study were four, two and four). Each focus group was well below the minimum recommendation for each focus group. Even the adolescents had to inform the researchers of what they already should have known as indicated earlier in bold.

Preparing for Winter - What am I up to? Books? Challenges

Well, it has been a challenge with my walking but I am slowly getting better. I have always been athletic until I returned to school and became a therapist which required so much sitting. With the loss of Mr Attitude, I am still missing the little guy. The house is quieter, I can sleep in whenever I want, I can do whatever I want to a degree but I would have him back in a second. I could deal with his heart murmur, his diminishing eye sight (he could still see his treats), his hyperthyroid, but it was his cognition which was a concern. It's one thing when a pet is happy but quite another if he is suffering. I made the decision which I felt was necessary and still do. I still chuckle when I think of him. Most of his things have been given to others who have pets. His stand is enjoyed by one of the neighbour's cat who loves to perch on it. I miss you baby boy and hope that someone is dancing with you upstairs in pet heaven. Well that is enough of my last pet. I did have the dog next door come and visit and the squirrels come to visit daily. Back to challenges - I have had to miss some wonderful conferences but this time has also allowed me to reflect. With some help I am going throughout the house and deciding what I really want and getting rid of the rest. I am also deciding where I want to live next. Niagara Falls is still my focus but I would like to be within walking distance of the falls. Is it now practical? Is my injury going to go away? Is a condo a better option than a house with an apartment for family and friends? Do I retire, continue to work or change occupations? When making decisions I always recommend making a list of pros and cons. I do this automatically in my grey cells but it is better if you write it down. Hallowe'en is next week and the weather should be good. I didn't put out anything this year, the first time ever, but I will certainly put up the tree and lights out for Christmas with help. With my injury, I have also come to realize how many great people I have in my life. So many have offered help. Wow! I am usually the care giver so that has been something. It was my dad who taught me to be independent, but I think I can relax that a bit. As I clear out what I don't use or need, I decide what and who I will give things away. I will donate my helmet, handcuffs, canteen etc....to the legion. I have already donated a few things to the school a few years back. I think of all my plaques and ponder if I am ready to part with them. Perhaps not right now. I am still going through paperwork gradually. Regarding my books, I read them and give them away. I have begun to read again and took advantage of every bit of sun and warmer weather we have been having, working around the weather. Books - Well, I did let my writing slip this year. Life happens. I never launched my book "Ominous". Oh well. I have had to prioritize and when I do that, my hobby comes last. I will be selling Ominious and my other books at the Legion, 7 Dec 24. I should be good by then. I am walking without crutches now and just need them for stairs so they come along with me in the car when I do my stuff. If you are interested in buying my books, I encourage you to do so. Next week, I want to start providing you with info on psych, theology and reading corner once again. Thank you for reading my blogs. I have also decided to open my practice to the Province of Quebec. So if you are living in the province of Quebec and want psychotherapy or couple or family therapy, I am available but keep in mind I do not speak French. Sorry. Bye for now. Web sites: silvaredigonda.ca redigondapsychotherapy.com

Pain (from an undergrad exam dissected for you) tid bits for you.

I am going through some paperwork and found old exams I wrote. The Assessment of three treatments for depression is too long to cut and paste. I will try to find the USB and if it is on it, I will post it. I wrote about another exam indicating pain below for you. It is just a tidbit from what I wrote because that was focused mainly on how the research is done which actually seems elementary to me now and would be boring for you. The paper was mainly multiple choice and I will skip all that. So for now, here goes some basic: People who sleep soundly and are well rested are able to tolerate pain more than those inflicted with chronic pain who cannot sleep. The Placebo effect is an inert chemical. It is normally a tablet of sugar and water made to look like a pharmaceutical drug for the client receiving it. The patient/client would think she is taking perhaps a pain reliever and in fact is taking no such thing. She responds as if the drug was taken instead of the placebo. I believe this works because the brain is fooled. It is believed that the drug would eliminate the pain and therefore it happens. It is the same as with people who take Tylenol (acetaminophen) and think it works immediately rather than after one hour. It is probable connected to Walls and Melyae’s Gate Theory of why some pain impulses reaches the brain and other’s don’t. I believe it triggers the same response. Endorphins could also be released the same way as thinking of something peaceful. It is the power of suggestion.

Imposter Phenomenon at Work: The Hidden Job of Dealing with Self-Doubt

I hope everyone had a nice Thanksgiving - Florida I thought of you and had you in my prayers - Talk about the Conference

It's been quite a bit of activity here in Toronto, but I am not going to talk about that today. I wanted to talk about the conference a bit more. We had two guest speakers and the first spoke about grief. Her experiences and education were not what I experienced. She was a nurse and has a Masters in Death (from the USA) and she talked about the stigma of men crying. In my experiences, men cry. I think the stigma that was so prevelant in the past is changing. I mentioned before that my dad was a crier. He cried when happy, sad, etc....In my family, he was the one who cried and I just accepted that. I also worked in challenging situations with men and they cried. Keeping tears within, when one needs to cry is not healthy. I have told people who keep so much inside to go into their cars, into the woods etc.....and let it all out. I have even offered to walk with them, if required. As the speaker was providing and sharing all aspects of grief, there was one missing. So, I am going to talk about it. It is the grief one may have when having an abortion. This is not about pro choice or against. As a therapist and outside the therapy room I have seen the suffering of women who had abortions and some have never forgiven themselves and mourn their child each and every day. Men too grieve, especially when they feel they have had no say. They feel that their child was killed. There is also the associated feelings of guilt and shame. What I normally suggest is a ritual for their loss. It can be lighting a candle, and giving the child a name. My thoughts go back to my undergrad when a nurse in my class arrived late and in a foul mood. I knew something was wrong and asked. She said she had assisted in an abortion at her hospital (no choice) and the fetus was not killed. After everyone had left the room, she held the fetus which had been dropped into a pail, until the fetus died. She was devastated. Not long afterwards I shared that story with a firefighter I knew and I saw the tears flow down his face. If you are out there and this has happened to you, please share it with someone. You don't have to carry this with you. There are services out there that provide guidance for women who are grieving because they had an abortion. They also provide a memorial service and each woman can light a candle for her child. I would like to think that they accept men. We lose thought of how people suffer and why. The second speaker is an American, Pete Sandoval, LPC, MA, RP (Qualifying). I found him to be excellent. He specializes in trauma therapy and is also trained in EMDR, and is a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner (SEP). He now practices in Kitchener-Waterloo and across Ontario at Grand River Healing. His question? If you had tears and they could talk, what would they say? I think you are getting the drift. I missed my live conferences and the sharing of minds. The food was great as well. I brought home one table vase of flowers and am so happy that it made it home. It is difficult to see the disolving of such an important Association. We are going through changes and so grief was an appropriate topic. Allow yourself to grieve and if you need help or support, reach out. There are topics that people fear to talk about because of stigma or politics etc....My objective is to help people, help themselves. So, I always address the elephant in the room. I wanted to attend a PTSD conference this week but unfortunately cannot make the drive. I was informed that I shouldn't drive for more than 15minutes and that is quite a drive. Oh well, Disney World is out too obviously for another conference. I should be ok with my education hours. Take care.

Memorial for Mr Attitude - Pet Grief - Conference

Saturday, I attended the final Conference (50 years)of the Ontario Association of Marriage and Family Therapists. Part of the conference included a presentation on grief. How appropriate since it includes loss of pets, work etc....beyone the obvious. I will speak more about the conference next week. I am behind once again and so am trying to catch up with my paper war. I am doing it with balance. I wish you a wonderful week. Take time to smell the flowers. The centre piece flowers is from the conference. Mr Attitude's bed has gone to the dogs. He never liked the bed, but I am glad someone else does. Of course we have Mr Attitude's photo of another Halloween

It has been a year since Israel was attacked

Today is the anniversary of that horrible day when Hamas mercilessly killed and kidnapped people, children and pets in an unprovoked attack against Israel. It was a tragedy which continues to cost so many lives. It is also a day that caused a rise in anti-semitism here at home. Our city hasn’t done enough to stop the destructive protests and too many politicians have failed to protect all citizens in our city. There is a difference between hatred and democracy and we need a strong government to take the reins. I myself was attacked in writing for failing to support the terrorists - Hamas. To stop this horrible war there needs to be a release of all hostages. Let them go home and allow the healing to begin. There has been so much suffering because of war, started by dictators and terrorists that doesn’t belong in any society. We could offer so much, if we could unite in peace.

No more dances with Mr Attitude - My baby boy has gone to pet heaven - I wish I had one more dance.

He was losing weight, yet eating like a pig. He was dehydrated, drinking more than ever. He had a heart murmour but he was also suffering more than likely from alzheimer's and that is why I had to make the painful decision to put my baby down. He was about 21 years of age. He acted like a mother hen, forcing me off the computer for regular breaks, lunch and the end of the day. He ensured I woke up promptly at 7 am. When I was dealing with a difficult case, he would snuggle up to me and just hug me. He had a wonderful, happy life and though I couldn't take a holiday, he was my mini holiday each day. He didn't have a home when I first noticed him. He was wild and so if I didn't adopt him he would have been put down. He had been locked inside a neighbour's house while it was being renovated and with no food and little water he managed to survive. With lots of patience, I taught him to feel safe. I taught him not to hunt birds and especially mice and rats. In his early years he was so grateful to me that he brought me a live rat bigger than his self. He didn't like people, but he loved me. I noticed him decline when I injured my leg and was restricted in my own walking. He wanted me to move quicker and I couldn't dance with him anymore, which he loved. He would move in front of the stairs as I crawled up so I could pick up his tiny body and move it up one step at a time. He wanted to jump on me from the dining room table and he wanted to jump into the bathtub, neither a good idea. He would yell out to let me know where he was and that led him doing the same at night. His crying increased and Friday night he cried all night and I knew I had to bring him to emerg. I did. I kissed his tiny head and told him he was going home as the solution to make him die took effect. I was asked by the vet if I wanted to be present. Let him die without me there was unthinkable. No more pets. I have loved my three animals, all wild, all from the streets because no one wanted them. Misty girl was a grey sweet girl and she cried when I buried her babies. She was the first to die and the vet had suspected poisoning. I interviewed all the neighbours and put them on high alert. It was Misty who brought me Holy Terror, the most beautiful cat I ever had. She too was sweet and only wanted to be near me. However, I still remember when she jumped on my stomache after staring at me for awhile as I lay on the sofa. I doubled up in pain, but just accepted that she was an animal and didn't know any better. She never did it again, but she wanted to be at my side at every opportunity. I had to put her down over a year ago now which I wrote in my blog. That was the most painful, even though this time it really hurts as well. I just hope that they are all together now. They have all given me such joy and were worth every missed holiday away. Thank you God for giving them to me. Now, please take care of them.

Fraud Alert. This gets rather tiresome.

ANDREA DAYANA SILVA TIPAN Greetings, This email is from Elon Musk and the founder and CEO of SpaceX, early-stage investor, CEO and product architect of Tesla, Inc., founder of The Boring Company, and co-founder of Neuralink and OpenAI, With an estimated net worth of around $245 billion. I am reaching out to you. Your email address has been randomly selected from the US, Canada, and Europe email database. I am pleased to inform you that you currently hold 18,087.71 Tesla shares valued at $4,124,270.00, with each share priced at $228.0 (TSLA). This substantial holding represents a significant valuation in your investment portfolio. I kindly request that you acknowledge the importance of this communication and respond promptly to this email for further instructions, Please take this email seriously and respond to this email: teslastockfoundation.team1@yandex.com Warm regards, Elon Musk.

Catching Up and bringing you up to date

Well, I am checking all my emails which didn't require immediate attention and so I shall find some video's for you to watch if you are interested. I require 40 hours education hours every two years and I ensure I get 20 a year. Normally, I get much more than I require. I like to keep up to date with information. I am still dealing with my injury which is now my knee. I go for physio and am going to get another x-ray and ultra-sound of my knee. I decided that I don't like big needles for accupuncture. One more time and then it is back to physio. Mr Attitude has been a nightmare since I am not able to cater to him as usual. I informed my sibling that if he was a man I would have divorced him. However, he is an animal used to being number one and he doesn't care if I hurt or not. Now, what he wants is that I lift him onto each step going upstairs after the days end. He has been a chore but he is elderly and what does he care as long as he's pampered. The American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists is being held at my favourite place in the world - Walt Disney at one of the Resorts. Why????? Why now?????I have to miss it this year and it is live only - too bad, so sad. The Men's Conference is this week which I am missing because I was supposed to be at Word on The Street, but I have to miss that too. I am still using crutches outside. Hopefully that will be over soon. I have one conference I have to go to and crutches it will be. That should be a challenging day but it is important. That is in October. I will be selling my books at the Christmas Fair at Legion 31. That is 7 Dec 24. It is amazing that I released my new book Ominous and didn't even have a whatch you mi call it. Anyhow, that is all for now. If I have repeated some stuff, please forgive me. I have Mr Attitude howling for me to get off the computer and he has come to realize that I hate that. No more animals. Nada. I have to remind myself that he is probably a hundred in animal years. Anyhow, take care. If you need slides for anything I have posted let me know. That is all for now. Oh, I almost forgot, I attended a meeting with the college and have learned that I can now accept clients from Quebec. I will eventually be updating my sites about that. I can also provide Professional Consultations world wide but stick to education. I have not decided what I would charge for that. I remember a classmate of mine in a course I was taking at a highschool to learn how to tile. That was quite a while ago. She had a few certificate courses if that many and was charging $350.-- an hour. She called it coaching. Now, that is it for today. Take care and take a look at my books at https://www.silvaredigonda.ca

Treatment and Management of Severe Eating Disorders

RCMP Cadet Mental Health: Recent Results and Insights from the Longitudi...

Hey Mayor!!!!!! The Toronto Police would like a raise? Apparently they are being ignored. You wouldn't do that, would you?

Aw, Toronto, the land of the brave - my home town, that has grown, especially the crime. Why on earth would our police want a raise? I mean really? Why would the Mayor ignore them? But, that is me. What do I know about running a city? I am not a politician. I am just one of many others, who call Toronto home. After all everyone has an opinion. Now let's get back to Toronto Police who want a raise and perhaps some other benefits. The Police Chief reported that this year 550 Officers were hurt. Is that all? I believe it is their Association head telling us that Police are leaving Toronto and that other neighbouring Police Forces are getting 5000. more. Boy, I was sure that in the past, Toronto Police was the best paid - what happened? I am not going to talk too much today about this, but I do want to say that there is rarely a weekend, I don't hear gun shots and I never report it because I want to protect our Police. They do so much with so little appreciation. I have always lived in Toronto unless my work took me elsewhere and my work certainly did that. Retiring here in my third career has certainly been an eye opener. I have seen crime rise in the city and the news excusing it, reporting that it is good compared to other places in the world. Well, I don't live in those other countries, I live here. I believe that the majority of Torontonians are great people. We are a diverse city, rich in both tradition and newcomers. We are friendly and love everything the city offers. We do have a criminal element but I believe that they are the minority and with a few changes in the law, we can surely get that in control. We need to support our Police. Olivia Chow prove me wrong. Give the Police the raise and resources they desparately need. Do a happy dance for them please and at least show them that you may care. After all they keep you safe too.

Scholar's Hub @ Home | Health in the Workplace: Thriving, not Just Survi...

RCMP Cadet Mental Health by Dr Nick Carleton, Psychologist

I just attended this EHN hour lecture and found it very useful for all police and emergency personnel. I will be getting the video and posting it here. I do hope that all emergency response persons watch it. There are about 13 emergency response persons to each 1500 Canadians. Keep in mind that the 13 is across the board. One may be a fire fighter, another a paramedic and etc..and so it is not a collective 13 of each such as 13 police. The one police officer and another firefighter is included as a separate number so that if you have one police officer responding, you now have 12 others which includes all job responses. It is obvious to me in Toronto that we don't have enough police and that is what is needed for their personal wellness. Dr Carleton reported that more personnel is required. There is a demand do more and more, with less. Since I will be posting the video here as soon as I get it, I won't go much further. I will give you some resources however for the study and resources. University of Regina. Sleep 101 Tablet; Suicide fact sheet; health promotion and chronic diseases in Canadian Journal. RCMP Study; self monitoring, www.rcmpstudy.ca www.saskptsisstudy.ca Of course I am behind due to the leg thing. I have another video that was sent to me by York University because I had to cancel a seminar which is about PTSD. Once I have the opportunity to watch it I will also post it here. I know that people read my blog worldwide. This will also apply to all of you. I will have to miss the conference with the American Association of Famly Therapy this year because they are going live at Disney World. Can you believe it? My favourity place in the world and I can't go. I am still on crutches and I can't travel because Mr Attitude is still alive. I could have mixed work and play, but the timing is not right. Yesterday I went to city hall in my area for the proof that I paid my taxes for revenue Canada and I decided to sit in and watch the Justice of the Peace in action. Of course my crutches set off the alarm and my purse contents are now all over the place but it was interesting and it actually felt like home. I have been in a few courts in my day but I never saw anything as small as this. It was cute. Now I did try to send off the proof today on line to Revenue Canada but of course I can't remember who my favourite history character is and I think I spelled my favourite author's name wrong so now I probably have to find a different route so it appears I may have to ask for an extension which I wasn't able to do because there was a 30 minute to 60 minute wait. Really? Really? Come on people, hire more!!!!!I will have to try to get this sorted tomorrow. So have a good day; have a good weekend. And please, please, if you are an emergency response person keep a look out for the video. Good talk.

OAMFT DISSOLUTION

I just attended the meeting to vote and it was passed. The Ontario Association of Marriage and Family Therapy is an organization I joined as a student and will be sorry to have it gone. Due to decreasing membership through out the years and lack of volunteers for Executive positions it had no choice. A scholarship will be set up with the American Association of Couple and Family Therapy for students from Ontario. There will be one final Annual General Meeting Oct 5, 24 at Tyndal College where all members and previous members and executives may attend. Of course I will be there with or without crutches. We will all be getting our invitations tomorrow. I will be able to catch up with previous students, colleagues etc....and saying goodbye to OAMFT is going to be difficult. We are also going to have a speaker and the topic is Organizational and Personal Goodbyes. I do volunteer for one organization for many years and due to my injury am paused as Eucharistic Minister due to the stairs at the altar. The calf is healing, however now the muscle by the knee is painful and after that heals, I should be good. I may just give up the gym. When Mr Attitude dies, I shall be focusing on condo's. I just bought a St Margaret lottery to see if I can win the condo by the waterfront. Yeah right! Oh guess what? Revenue Canada has once again reached out to me to prove that I paid my property taxes. I wish Revenue Canada was a lottery. They keep telling me I am randomly selected each year. It took 30 minutes to get 611 to disconnect me after such a wait. After another 30 minutes I finally got a woman with a sense of humour. I was the only person who paid my taxes who was calling. I complained due to the wait time and I did get a call about that. I suggested that perhaps the city should not send out notices to the entire city at the same time so the wait is not as long. They thought that was a good idea. Should I send them a bill? I am not going to be able to hop along my city hall to have the stamp and receipt Reveue Canada wants right now. However, Revenue Canada informed me I could ask for an extension. I am hoping to have more energy next week. For now, I am trying to get physio twice a week to expedite my healing. Should I try swimming? Yup, I tried to suspend my gym membership while I heal but they want a doctor's note. Can you believe that? Just to suspend? I won't be doing that unless my doctor calls me in because he is obviously overworked and I am not going to ask for something a high school student may need. So, have a good weekend you all!!!!! If you want to read one of my books, make it an ebook please at https://www.silvaredigonda.ca Later.

Tired and Wired: Sleep and Hyperarousal

Hey Guy Buy Me sold at the Coptic Centre. Thank you Olive Steele and her volunteer

As you know I had to miss this signing event and it appears "Hey Guy Buy Me" was the people's choice. I thank Olive Steele, author and organizer and her supportive volunteer for doing this for me.

Due to my injury I will not be able to attend Word on The Street.

This leg business has been something else. I have had to defer from attending Word On the Street this year because I was told yesterday that I would need to be on crutches for another month or two. Two is not a number I was looking at and one is too much of a gamble since today is the deadline. I am just grateful that I will not be losing my money and can use it towards next year. This leg business started with me being at the gym and all excited that I was feeling my best. I felt like I was in great shape. Then I went home and I got a shooting pain within my right calf that evening. It was so bad that I cried. I took a tylonal to help ease some pain so I could sleep. I haven't had a perfect night sleep since. I also haven't taken any pain meds since. I have seen so many clients become addicted due to pain medicine which was initially prescribed, that I would rather suffer the pain and boy did I ever. That happened on a Friday. I thought the pain would subside but Monday, I was doing paperwork all day and by the end of it I was no better off. I was worse. I managed to get to see a physio therapist and he wanted me to go to the hospital. We compromised on me going to see a physician. I tried my own doctor's office, which had closed for the day and then limped to the walk-in-clinic which was also closed. The pain only enhanced. I finally decided to go to Sunnybrook emergency and again limped all over the place to find parking. They don't accept credit cards and I had limited cash for the emergency area. One person on a scooter led me to a parking space and I used all my cash for about 2 hours parking. Limping became more difficult. I got into the emerg and now you have to supply all your info to a machine. The last time I went to emerg was due to a sprained ankle years ago and boy a lot has changed. I was informed by a staff member that my purse was on a print out machine and so I removed it which is where I received a receipt and number. I limped towards a seat in a congested area. A man was loudly speaking into his cell phone about conspiracy theories. This was just after the attempted killing of Trump. I found an empty seat as far as possible from him but he continued to be just as loud. I looked up at the tv screen which indicated we were 110 in the waiting room and it would take 10 hours for most of us to see triage. Another half hour later we should be able to see a physician. The operative word here is "should". Triage has sure changed since my days in the military. Triage was conducted to determine the state of seriousness of injury. It sure didn't mean most should be seen in 10 hours and maybe you will see a doctor a half hour later. The man kept on saying the same thing and I thought there was no way I could hear about Trump for another 10 hours. The only sane thing he said was that he had never seen an emergency room like this. That I agreed with. A woman in front of me kept glaring at him and yelling out that no one wanted to hear him. Of course he couldn't hear her because he was too busy hearing himself. You know buddy, if any leader wanted someone dead, he would be dead and a sharp shooter is all that is needed. Not everyone is as obvious as Putin and North Korea. The tv screen again indicated that the numbers on our cards was not indicative of where we stood in being seen. I decided that I could not wait in the emergency throughout the entire night. I got up and while limping by the Security Officer, I informed him I would rather die comfortably at home than wait here for 10 hours minimum. He appologized and suggested I try another hospital. There was no way that was going to happen. I let him know that it wasn't his fault. I went home after meeting the parking Enforcement Officer near my car. I spoke to him briefly. Glad that at about $5.50 an hour I still had time on the meter. I tried using my credit card initially but it said it was counterfeit. I was so glad that I had no problem using my card after that and finding that it was not so. The next day I managed to see my physician and I told him that my physio therapist suggested that I get an untra sound. I see now that everyone was concerned I may have a blood clot. I suppose if I had, I wouldn't have made it by then. The temp secretary (the regular secretary was on holidays) was informed to get me in soonest and she said that the primary place the technician was away (I learned later that he wasn't away, he was just fully booked). The Secretary tried to call another place and there was no answer so she gave me a form of the primary location and directions to the second place. So I went, limping and suffering more pain. Now this was the day Toronto flooded. I went to the place recommended and the place was full of water flowing from the ceiling and there was no electricity, thankfully. They informed me to go to another location and guess what? They too had no power and there was flooding. My pain was only increasing as I was limping away. When I got home I called the first place and I had an appointment for the next day. Guess what - no blood clot. All is ok. I just need to elevate leg and ice it, rest being the operative word. After all that I decided I needed crutches because by this time I couldn't walk without support. My doctor wanted me to use a cane and the physio therapist wanted me to use a walker. I compromised and got crutches which I have had experience with and trust more. I could walk with support and just hang out when I got tired. Am I trying to be funny? Nope - all true. Two weeks ago I started physio, missing my own physio therapist who moved to Brandford so he and his wife could afford to buy a house. My loss is their gain because he is good. I go for physio and afterwards I can't walk at all because the pain has moved to the heel of my foot and my toes were numb. I told the therapist and then the leg was massaged upwards rather than downwards. After that the pain moved to my knee which was really bad. Then yesterday I went for physio to the same person who had recommended hospital and though I couldn't walk because of the knee pain, today is better but not by much. He gave me a lecture while lazer was used on my lower leg and then a much needed massage of the lower leg. He thought the swelling had increased since that first day when he wanted me to go to emerg. Today I recevied an email from Word On the Street and I had to let them know that it would take another month or two to be able to walk without crutches. Since it also appeared to be a deadline at noon, I was permitted to defer - thankfully. I won't be losing all the money I paid to be there - it will be deferred as payment for next year. Though I shall miss not being there, I can now relax with something less to think about getting to. I took a month off work and am slowly easing myself to seeing existing clients on line. I had to cancel for a month because I couldn't sit for 50 minutes. Today I managed to sit long enough in the backyard to drink my coffee. I never thought sitting in the backyard would be a big deal. What did I learn from all this? There is no way I am going to an emergency room again unless it is on a stretcher. We definitely have a problem Houston. I remember years ago a person died in the emergency room in New York City. I thought it was unbelievable at the time. I can easily see that happening in Toronto before something is done. Emergency should be just for emergency. Also, if you go to a walk-in clinic now when you have a physician, your physician is penalized. We need to make things better here. Another thing I have experienced is the kindness of strangers. So many people have asked if they can help. One neighbour brought me food for a week and she has cancer and is undergoing chemo. My next door neighbour has been taking the trash in and out for me. I have hired a refugee to help with household chores. I thought I was doing her a favour when I hired her, but boy did that get reversed quickly. People are always trying to help me and the jokes are endless. I didn't know I wasn't 16 years old anymore and shouldn't be climbing ropes - that from my garbage man. There was one woman who approached me in the parking lot near my car. I was on alert due to the recent distraction theft. She told me that she felt bad for me and she admired my independance. She said she was still suffering pain from a knee surgery two years ago. Men have approached me asking me if they can help and I always say no thank you and wonder if they want to rob me or help? I was even grateful that when I went to get cash at the bank instant teller that I wasn't robbed by the two men inside and said so to the third man with a radiant man who opened the door for me from the outside. So for you, who were looking forward to seeing me as much as I was to see you at Word on The Street, I am afraid I have to skip it this year. I will be at the legion though for their Christmas sale in December. I'll give you more info on that later. May I ask you to say a prayer for me? I am a big sucky baby.

Update tidbit - My books are being sold this Saturday at 1245 Eglinton Avenue West, Mississauga, Coptic Center, Trinity Hall

Well you are probably wondering where I have been? At home, icing my right calf every two hours, leg elevated and in pain. I am now going for physiotherapy and have slowly begun seeing long term clients from the comfort of my sofa (on line only). Just to add that I am on a roll as my car won't start and it is now on my bucket list to get to when I can drive it painlessly. So, I have lots to tell you but I can't sit at my desk for too long so that will have to wait. I was supposed to sell my books this Saturday from 10:00 to 4pm. Unfortunately, I won't be able to attend due to my current leg problem which I hope heals for Word On The Street. I have a good feeling about that. So for now my books will be sold Saturday without me. If you go and buy "Ominous", I want your opinion and feedback. I consider this my best book. Hope you can attend and feel free to speak to my ghost at the table. You may not be able to hear my replies but I shall be thinking about you. Good talk.

Joe Biden - You served with Grace

Well, I have been put out of commission due to my right calf. I am ok and can now move better with crutches. I cancelled all appointments, until my leg is up and walking. I was going to say running, yup. Anyhow, I just want to say that I heard the news about Biden not running for the next election. I liked him. In my opinion he was grounded, kind and solid - a gentleman as well. He was also a friend to Canada and realized the threats in the world and how to deal with all this in a dignified manner. I have decided I will not be watching the elections in the States. It is too painful. Anyhow, I shall be sharing my adventures with you as a result of my leg. Ouchie! Have a good one.

Just want to express my condolences to the USA

I just want to express my sympathies to all involved in the aftermath of the attempted assassination of former President Trump. I have been watching the updates on CNN and acknowledge the suffering of so many people. I wish Trump a speedy recovery. I also feel sad for the family of the fire figher who needlessly died and his mourning family. May God be with you all during this difficult time. I have always had a love for the States. There were so many people involved in trying to help, which is the true spirit of humanity.

Tired and Wired: Sleep and hyperarousal - notes

Last week I attended an interesting webinar provided by Dr Anne Germain, Founder and CEO, NOCTEM Health. I am providing some notes for you in case I won’t be able to share the video once it comes out. Duration of sleep differs - most feel good with seven hours, as long as they feel rested. Sleep supports homeostasis across body systems - mood/irritability, anxiety, cardiovascular disease, weakened immune systems etc…….There is a correlation between obesity and lack of proper sleep, significant risk of psychiatric disorders. Main disruption is hyper arousal. Consequences - fatigue; malaise, daytime sleepiness, concentration. Insomnia include problems falling or staying asleep, at least one day consequence; at least three times a week for at least three months, despite an inadequate opportunity for sleep. Most insomnia is Comorbid, precurser to psychiatric disorders, relapse from previously treated and physical problems. In combat Veterans with PTSD - Combat exposure increase possibility of PTSD. Having insomnia or problems sleeping prior to combat is a risk factor for PTSD. Insomnia is a treated condition. CBT first. Stimulus control: Aligning time in bed to sleep duration (+30 minutes), relaxation and cognitive restructuring and behavioural experiments. Healthy hygiene is not a treatment of insomnia. Target sleep first when targeting other psychological conditions. Resources provided - Coleen Carney. I looked her up and she is at Toronto Metropolitan University (right here in my city. I would recommend you look up these references). Oversleeping - nine hours or more can cause problems. However, if you feel energized that is ok. Ages 18-30 period of vulnerability. If you sleep nine hours and have problems - good to go to a sleep clinic. Sleep apnoea - runs in families - nap and never feel rested. Regarding children 11-12, engage parents. Joey Mandel is an expert. Treatment with or without ADHD. Caffeine - amount and timing is important- quite a bit of variation between people - can take 10 hours to get out of the system. Cannabis - not enough science and data. Literature is all over the place. Very small - some negative and some positive. EMDR when used for nightmares can be useful, not a focus of insomnia.

Sleep Paralysis

Mission Appeal Yesterday by Deacon Rory desmond of the Diocese of Miao

On occasion I will watch a documentary regarding missionary work. My interest is of course religion and how it affects people all over the world. This is important in my work. Yesterday at mass I listened to Deacon Rory. I didn't quite know what to make of him. He was praising the altar men and their families. I thought that perhaps he was trying to recruit young men for his cause. A Deacon is not a Priest. Normally, he can be moved forward to becoming a Priest. Women are not allowed to be Deacons in the Catholic Church. He began talking about a small place in the Himalays (India). He said that there have been Roman Catholics there for forty years. If you type out the Deacon's name you will get more information. I have read some, but want to talk more about what I did not see. He said that at the time the tribe which is considered lower than the lowest Caste in India had no choice but to be Hindu. Through missionary work, the tribe learned about the Catholic faith and converted. This wasn't allowed and the punishment was death. However, the tribe protested in large amounts and so the women and children were gathered by the military (who are in charge) and tortured. The children and women began to recite the rosary during the torture to a point where the army men believed their God was too powerful. Long story made short, they were left alone. Actually if you want to hear him, you can look up utube and paste St John Bosco Church, 0900 Italian mass and fast forward to where he talks. I didn't take notes and so please note that any errors are my own. Since, of course I was thinking about religion, different perspectives, torture and culture. We don't learn do we? I was also thinking about wars and the anti Israel protests and the requests about no affiliation with the University in Israel. I was thinking about how old men would go out to the wilderness etc.....all alone to think. Of course, I like to think and relax in my backyard. The idea of going anywhere where I couldn't have my coffee shops well.................I remembered a conversation with a Chinese student I liked. He was trying to convince me that China had to protect itself against Religion. There was a protest of the Tibet people going on at the time. He rationalized asking me to imagine if a religion gained popularity in advance numbers, what that could do to the stability of maintaining the function of the Chinese government. Though I didn't agree with him, I did understand his perspective. That is the arena of universities - dialogue, knowledge, research, thought etc....I have listened to research from countries throughout the world regardless of the politics because academics are a culture of knowledge, hope etc.....I could easily understand how people who are considered the lowest of the lowest within their own country would want to believe in a God who offers them equal status. The Catholic Church has taken care of them with medicine and education. This is what the talk was about. The Deacon was asking for funds from us to help them. I have known many people from India, mostly those I attended school with. I was even asked to go to work in India but how can I do that? I have to admit, I like my comforts and coffee and you are beginning to note is one big one. I was also asked when I was going to UofT by a class mate if I was interested in working with the poor in Kentucky. There would be very little pay but I would have room and board. She explained how mothers would give their babies coke to drink and there was an attempt to educate. Well, of course I said no, even though I love the States and love mountains, but little pay? I am no St Therisa. Is that a weakness? I don't think so. There are always requests to go help people all over the place on my own dime. What I see is a failure for countries failing their own people. We are hurting a bit now in our own country which I never saw before but again this seems to be a trend. Look up the Urban Planner, a Canadian who travels throughout the world watching the people losing their homes and this becoming a big market for the rich to build luxury homes/condos. I see that it has started here. A social worker was telling me how sad it was for her to see seniors on the street, homeless and unable to take care of themselves. Did I ever think I would see this in my own country? Never in a million years. However, I do see hope, because the people are beginning to see what is going on and different levels of government need to pay attention because we live in a democratic society. As a therapist I have been in awe of people who come to me because of torture regarding the refusal of changing their religion. Women who are raped and tortured because they believe in Jesus. They refuse to deny their faith and take another. They are braver than me. I would tell the bozos anything they want to hear because I have no respect for them. However, I would be praying for help at the same time. However, we don't always get it right at how we will react in a crises. I have surprised myself at times. I have seen men and women from various religions who suffer. Here in Canada they can practise their faith. This needs to be preserved and respected. This is part of our democracy. I will consider this as thoughts of the week. Have a good one. It will be a good pace for me. Find your own safe place where you can relax. What do you think?

What have I been up to?

Happy belated Canada Day and America, Happy Independence Day! In the summer time fewer people need my help because in general people feel better in the summer. It has been so hot in Toronto that I can only deal with it in the morning and evening. Otherwise, I am in air conditioning. Yup - and I also read a lot more when I can sit outside. I have to admit, I have been feeling lazy, wanting to play more and work less. I should be loading up photos soon of places to go. I went to my first gay wedding, my first outside wedding and my first Jewish wedding all in one day. Again, I had to travel to the middle of nowhere. Now, if you ever go to a Jewish wedding, bring yourself a thermos of coffee. The brother of the bride whom I know, did his best and couldn't succeed. There was all kind of booze but no coffee bar. Apparently if meat is served, milk won't be and that is why a Jewish friend of mine, said that coffee was not served. That I take my coffee black didn't matter I suppose, but you know what? I got my coffee, by telling my server that if I didn't get my coffee within a half hour, she would not want to see me. She quickly brought me a coffee to go. Only, of course I stayed. There was red wine and white wine and all kinds of spirits. However, I was driving. Don't drink and drive people. It doesn't take much for me get drunk and that is exactly what happened when a friend of mine who has cancer came over. We each had two drinks of wine and that is all it took, because I guess we don't drink that much. I blurted out that my friend could not die because I am running out of friends. That caused a lot of laughter. So, say a prayer please for my friend. I debated what I was going to do Canada Day but decided that this year I would stay home with Mr Attitude. He is 100 years old in cat years apparently. We are getting old together. He is getting more annoying but I cannot imagine him gone. I didn't even want pets, but boy did I get attached with this little guy no one wanted and his two adopted siblings no one wanted because they were so wild. Holy Terror died and so did Misty girl. So, I spent the night on Canada Day watching the fireworks from my room. The little guy is scared of fireworks so the airconditioning is on and all the windows closed, because my neighbourhood invests in lots of fireworks. When my little guy goes to pet heaven, I shall soothe myself by going on a great vacation. I have been looking at trips and real estate for years but the little guy who hisses at big dogs and house cleaners, is a priority. He hates people and animals. Now that he is older he doesn't hide but challenges so I need to be careful. No more cleaners or new visitors. I have to hope he stays away from my office. I want to have as much fun as possible while still maintaining my responsibilities. That is all for this week, but I shall continue with all my saga next week, you will once again get my work on theology, therapy and writers corner. For now, have fun this week, try something new but stay out of trouble. Good talk. If you want a suspense spooky book, order mine at www.silvaredigonda.ca What are you waiting for - Ominous - released for the first time this year. Feel free to make positive comments on any of my books. Again, I am available to book clubs etc...I actually, unlike my pet, like people. What? You don't like my book?????????? Where's my violin? Next book event is 24th of Aug 24 at the Coptic Centre in Mississauga. They are nice to me. Later.

Writers Corner

Last night I attended a talk with the Sisters of Crime for about an hour plus. It started late, but I thought I was having difficulty getting on which was frustrating. It was held by the States and I have to admit, I attend theirs more than in Canada. It’s all good. The discussion was about the Ins and Outs of Distribution. They talked about getting books into their libraries. I think it is easier here in Canada and should apply. They talked about audio books which is something to think about. They talked about Amazon which I no longer use because having used Canada Amazon continues to be a nightmare. I had to close off and decline all payment because they just ignore that the site is closed. If you have to do everything on line, than you should provide easy access and verifications. So using Amazon is out of the question. The USA was good but Canada and Mexico is still trying to rip me off. This gets tiresome. They talked about Indie book stores. When I wrote my first book, I travelled to all my bookstores and of course it was Hey Guy Buy Me. You see my problem has always been time. I have to pick and choose what is best. Work smart, not hard is the best advice I ever got in university. I need to apply it. They talked about book clubs. Ok, if you are reading this, I am available to book clubs. The great advice the sisters gave is do one thing at a time or it can get overwhelming. Yup! As an independent writer I become a publisher for my own books - Yup. So, I am going to say good-bye now. They also said other stuff which I don’t do and don’t think it is good to share, so I won’t. Oh, the one thing they said which I have heard before is to have your own web site. Mine is www.silvaredigonda.ca . They said it is best not to be dependent on other web sites. I agree. So, if you want to buy one of my books, check out www.silvaredigonda.ca If you have problems ordering a book contact me and I will ship anywhere in the world and will tell you the costs before delivery. Please do not contact me for any other reasons. I am simply not interested. I have heard it all. I am a famous actor, a surgeon, a professor, a politician………………I am not impressed. Selling books only people. Good talk.