The Internet Murders continues www.silvaredigonda.ca

Tomasso’s house was on a relatively quiet side street. Philip knocked at the back door and Tomasso answered it, beer in one hand. He was beaming. Tomasso loved his work and he loved his home life just as much, if not more. “Hey maw, look who’s here!” Mrs. Rossini turned away from the hot stove and her face lit up. “Philipo come in; sit down. You must be hungry. You look so skinny. I have to fatten you up. Look at Tomasso. He is healthy!” Tomasso beamed. “Tomasso, give Philipo a glass of vino, from the basement. Bring up a bottle.” Tomasso began to object because he wanted to offer Philip a beer. He received a slap at the back of the head. “Maw, you can’t hit me. I am a man.” “A man! A man you say? A man listens to his mama. Now go get the vino.” Tomasso went to get the wine reserved for special occasions. Philip was always a special occasion because he could do no wrong in his mother’s eyes. At the dinner table there was a nice spread, which was a regular routine at the Rossini household. “Philipo, tell me. “Did you find a nicea gal? My Tomasso, he don’t wanna nicea gal. I try.” “Mrs. Rossini, I am still looking for one just like you, but I don’t think she exists.” Tomasso’s mom beamed. “Yu talka to alla gals lika that. I know. You carmo!” “Charmer, maw.” Tomasso blurted out before getting another cuff at the back of the neck.” “Maw stop hitting me!” Philip laughed. There was so much warmth and laughter in this house. Not at all like at his mom’s. His own mother never overcame the loss when his dad died. He had been her passion, her one love, she told him sadly over tea one day. His mother was the opposite of Mrs. Rossini except for one thing. They both had an enormous and protective love for their sons. Mrs. Rossini was a big woman and a bit crass for some, but with a huge heart and bubbling laugh. Mrs. Rossini always wore an oversized apron, with a caricature of a very jolly man with the most elaborate moustache, holding onto a spatula with some strings of spaghetti dangling. It seemed to be a male version of herself. He tried to remember if he had ever seen her without it. His own mother, the epitome of sophistication, was always immaculately dressed in the latest designer clothes, her blond hair coiffed neatly back. She had a soft demeanour and still turned heads where ever she went. She seemed oblivious to the attention. She spent most of her time supporting local charities and fundraising for the art gallery and the wing of the hospital where her husband had died. She was very comfortable. His dad had seen to that. He had been heavily insured and had accumulated some wealth throughout his young life. There was a pension from the university as well. Maybe with time, he thought, she could find love again. His attention went back to the table where Mrs. Rossini had provided Tomasso with another smack at the back of his head. “Mawwwww!” Excerpt From: Silva Redigonda. “The Internet Murders.”

The Pope's Visit to Canada - Penance - Hate needs to stop - Racism needs to stop.

What happened at the Residential Schools is terrible. What has been happening to our Aboriginal people is terrible. Just last month I watched a documentary that women were being sterilized without their permission. It is difficult to fathom how this can be happening or is it? Aboriginal women have also gone missing for years and what has been going on there? I watched one movie based on a true story years ago about a policewoman investigating disappearances. There was another situation in Quebec, where an Aboriginal woman was dying and being emotionally tortured by a nurse. The patient actually taped it live for the world to see and the nurse was subsequently fired. Just recently in the States I watched two children being ignored by a Sesame Street character - shameful. I have to add that because it all has to do with children - with hate. There is a sense of entitlement that one race or culture or religion is better than another. Let us not forget that Canada belonged to the Aborignals. They were considered savages and their land taken away as is still happening today, hey Putin? I am a Roman Catholic and the amount of people I have helped who hate Catholics is worthy of attention. I don't take it personal. I completed one unit working as a chaplain intern because simply it was a way to turn four years into three with one summer semester. Some other chaplains would let me know that they didn't like Catholics and I would ask why because I was curious. One told me that she had been told by a nun when she was in Africa that she wouldn't go to heaven because she wasn't Catholic. I told her that the nun was stupid, which I was chastised by my supervisor at the time, who is not Catholic and whose advice I heed to this day. However, that Chaplain who was not a student decided I wasn't so bad after all for a Catholic and actually started liking me. Religions are composed of people and sometimes those people systemically do horrible things. It is not brain science that a child is a child. Let them be children. Nurture them, respect them, envelope them with safety and love so they can grow and appreciate life and what it all offers without horrific memories. Recently, while the President was in Saudi Arabia, he was told that values should not be imposed. I thought about that remark. I have decided that the remark is outdated. The President was concerned about a reporter that been killed. If memory serves me right it was quite primitive. Recently I was watching a documentary where homosexuals are being tortured under Soviet rule and I won't go into details of how horrid the torture was. I had believed that I had seen it all and I have not. I am still stunned and disappointed by what I hear. Fortunately I have so much love for nature and people in general but that does not mean I tolerate much. My confession is always my lack of patience and boy do I get penance for that. The Pope's visit is a message to all that what happened was evil. The Pope is a leader and this difficult journey is a beginning for healing while telling the world that this is not acceptable. We need to love each other a tad more, don't you think? I wasn't going to touch this topic today because there is so much conflicting feelings out there with hatred seeping through. Let's remember that the human race is one. If we all mind our own business and don't get involved as was the norm in the past, it offers those who commit horrors to continue without reservation. We need to do better. We need to be better. If we don't speak up than we too are responsible. What do you think?

The Internet Murders - continues www.silvaredigonda.ca

Sandra was eating her jello. She couldn’t believe they gave her jello when she was starving. The coffee, however, was amazing. When the nurse cheerfully walked in Sandra asked her about the coffee. "This coffee is great. What is it?” “Instant,” the nurse replied, while humming a tune. “It can’t be. I hate instant.” It was the end of the working day and Philip was driving to St Clair and Dufferin. Traffic was heavy, but it was sunny out and that made it a nice drive. There were still Italian families in the area, though not as many as before. Many had moved out to Woodbridge and other communities north of the City. The Italians took a great deal of pride in their heritage and their successes, after coming here from humble beginnings. There were many now who were quite wealthy. Tomasso had grown up in the area and never left it. He lived at home with his mother and said that all Italians did that until they got married. Philip knew that was not quite true. He knew many who were single and had their own homes, but he wasn’t going to tell Tomasso that.”

Tid bit Info from Psychology Today regarding relationships

I saved the June 22, edition because I thought it would be interesting for you. Here goes pp 18 -19, tid bits. Many tend to have a same-race preference in dating. Couples often have the same body type. Researchers who collected images of spouses both as newlyweds and after 25 years of marriage found that partners generally became more similar in looks over time, which also predicted greater relationship quality. I have provided couple therapy for people prior to marriage, newly married, and couples with 30 plus years of marriage. I find that people call or email me to get free sessions or consultations. I do not provide that. I charge 140 a fifty minute session which will increase to 150. in January. I have kept my fees down due to the pandemic and need to catch up. I see people individually, as a couple or as a family. Couple therapy can be done with individuals, because skills can be developed to learn how to make changes in a relationship. However, if one is in an abusive relationship and changes within the relationship is not possible, then one has to consider what changes need to be made for one’s self to move away from that abuse. That can take a lot of work. If you decide to leave your partner make sure you do so safely. Get a support system which is normally discouraged from the abusive partner. Keep your passport, money and a degree of clothing at an alternative safe place if you decide to leave. Remember that the police is there to protect you. If your abusive partner is a police man or woman don’t let that stop you. That extends to powerful positions your partner may hold. I charge individuals, couples and families the same fee. I do not charge separately for eg. 140. for each person. I understand that some therapists are being trained to do so. Though I understand that, my ideology is I am spending the same time so why charge more? Some people need therapy once a week, some in crises need more and there are some I see bi-weekly or monthly. This is always up to the individual or couple. I do see people of the same family individually if everyone is in agreement. This works well systemically. However, if there is no agreement, I respect the wishes. Have a good day. In Toronto it is very hot. What do you think? I still have another topic from Psychology today to talk about and merits its own spot. That will continue next week - "Chasing Chaos". 

Death (Theology notes) continues

Theology of death and dying - individual death - Lane (Vermont) - Western secular culture. Life Expectancy has increased - change in which death occurs - medical postpones. Hospitals keep people alive. Hospice - it is ok to die. Death is moved from family to institutions. From wakes to funeral homes. A lot of commendation around death (sales pitch). Care of dying out of the community. We still are not sure what to do with it. Sophia present in the creation, Holy Spirit and in the Church. Therefore what is she and how is she related? Why is it feminine and what is the significant. These are about past, present and future. He distinguishes prophesy from the apocalyptic. According to Nolan, how do we understand? Drama of our Christian existence past - past prophesy - for a specific context about the future parousia is reference second coming of Christ. Into institution: eg. Black Foot - Street person, 20 years earlier, Church filled - now private rather than community. We have a notion of massive death - WW2, Russians under Stalin, Holocaust, nuclear bomb, Hiroshima. I am going to add Ukraine (not from notes). There is a morbid fascination as apposed to denial of death. Movies are low on Christology eg. Christ of Montreal - hits someone. Common: 1. Death is received as separation of death and soul. Incarnation - bind body and spirit and mind - death is the whole person. He could be our limited - end of time wherever - united with the soul. 2. Death and dying has five stages. 3. Natural - can happen any time. It is going to happen to all - natural/unnatural. 4. Body is diminishing as spirit develops. (Roger Trois Fortaines, S.S. I Do Not Die. Lane - Proper response to death is hope. There is no need to resent youth because they are going to get old. Finality - time to think about death. A human person is towards death. We don’t have a choice to be here. Try holding your breath. There are physical things keeping us alive, saying it is going to be ok because we don’t know. Is there life after death? Doesn’t tell us much about life after death. Death is a decision. Death is expected - caregiving. Death that is unexpected is tragic. Part of human life is looking for fulfillment. Activity of dying, finality of death is expectant. Death is the last of personal history. New relation with the Creator. (What I have in my notes is “keep an open mind, but not so open that your brain falls out”. I am not sure if that is a quote from the prof or whoever, but I think it is a good one, so I placed it here.) A book regarding different religions about deaths is The Meaning of Death by John Boker (no, I didn’t read it). Next portion of theology is Hell and Purgatory. Let’s take a breath and go onto another topic.

Eschatology (theology notes continues)

In Mystical Tradition - May dancing In the Old Testament there are no writings concerning the thereafter. In the Normadic stage the dead were often left behind such as in a cave. Early notion of gathering - newly deceased to the tomb. There is no elaborate theology of death in Israel. It wasn’t something better or less. Book of Amos - Thought body lived in some form but diminished. It was devastating not to have a male heir in Israelite patriarchal society. Sheovl - dead existed in a shadowy sphere; one thing it would do is to embrace life more. No communication with God. Shoevl - gradually becomes hell or heaven. It became a sense of negativity. There are some isolated translations in the Old Testament - Isesha go to heaven. That’s a translation. The dead do not sense resurrection. Psalm 49- salvation for Sheovl. The dormation of Mary - She does not die. Falls asleep and wakes up. Messiah - son of man - inclusive child of humanity. In Daniel, interrupted as St Michael - Patron Saint of the Jews. In that text it symbolizes Jesus coming in salvation. Son of man. People who wrote about Jesus were doing it under threat of death. Latest written in John’s gospel. The main eschatology message of Jesus is reign of God - Kingdom of God. Mark - 1.15 - repent and eyyus - it’s near. 122x Kingdom of God - in scripture. 99 of them are from Symoptics. Reign of God is eschatology and central to Jesus teaching. Bound up with conversion. There is something decisive about the reign of God. Gospel of Mathew - passion in the apocalyptic - the anticipation of the coming of the Lord. Veil ripped in two. Jesus rising from the dead is eschatolozied. God will go to any lengths to save people who want to be saved. Daniel - reference to resurrection. Many will rise to glory, some to eternal punishment. Oscar Romeo - Martyred “If they kill me, I will rise again.” Prolepsis is defined as anticipation. So resurrection of the individual is the anticipation of all. Corn.—If Christ has not been rised from the dead then it has been in vain. Ultimate act of evil people, kill goodness and yet there is still hope for us. Eschatology becomes more popular when close to dramatic change. Hellenism is ancient belief in demons which rose. In Hellenism, Sophia is as interesting. Sophia is wisdom. Sophia is present with God while creating the world. There is a real resurgence - Sophiology - radical Orthodox to pick up world’s vision and God’s vision. Slovic at turn of last century. Slovia - writes anti Christ under siege - 1917 Russia. We still are not sure what to do with it. Sophia is present in the creation, holy spirit and in the Church. Therefore, what is she and how is she related? Why is it feminine and what is the significance of that? These are about past, present and future. He distinguishes prophesy from the apocalyptic. According to Nolan how do we understand this? Drama of our Christian existence past - past prophecy - for a specific context about the future, parousia is reference to second coming of Christ. Will continue theology with Death. Theology of death and dying.

Regarding Canadian veterans approaching 100 years of age.

Dear Silva Redigonda, The Commander Royal Canadian Air Force has invited the RCAF Association to help find veterans approaching their 100th birthday. The goal is to acknowledge their service, and help celebrate achievement of such a significant milestone. If you can help, please reach out to neighbours, friends and family everywhere and find our veterans, and send their details to the Executive Director RCAF Association, Dean Black, at director@airforce.ca or write to RCAF Association PO Box 2460 Stn D Ottawa Ontario K1P 5W6. The information will be passed to the Commander RCAF for special mention as we approach the RCAF's 100th birthday 1 April 2024.

Holy Terror made in heaven

Optimizing Care in Inflammatory Bowel Disease

I attended this webinar 21 May 22 for 1.5 hrs. I can’t really claim the hours because I am not a physician but I attended because as a psychotherapist people come to me with physical complications as well, so it doesn’t hurt to accept an invitation if it helps any of my clients. The speaker was Dr Anita Afzali MD. MPH etc…….She has quite a few interesting initials. She talked about this in detail but I will give you the tid bit version. Crohn’s Disease is a progressive disease. The longer you have it, the more the chance of needing surgery. If you have one surgery, chances again increase for another. She stated, “we need to do a better job.” Up to 80% of patients will have a progressive disease. Colitis is less understood. Dr Afzali suggested never acting on a single elevation. Supplemental vitamins can elevate. Octave Clinical Program U.C. 65 years of age is the risk factor for the drug, 1/3 above age 65. With Upadacitinib there is improvement the next day. For moderate to severe Crohn Disease - Patient - treatment option - choose one biologic medication and be on it for 10 years. One patient (six months ago) had six inches of her stomach removed. Continued biologic after one month off. Tailor and individualize - these are the options. Looking at everything - this is the best treatment choice. High risk - have to do something biological. Low risk - have more time. Week 12 - response to medication. Need more data for combining. That is all the notes I have for now. I have lots to catch up with once again. I don’t know who invited me to attend, but thank you. Any errors written here are my own and not Dr Afzali.

Live Video Address | President Volodymyr Zelenskyy at University of Toro...

Sex - interesting article from Couple and Family Magazine

I have been saving this article for you since I last wrote about sex. This is from the Family Therapy Magazine Jan/Feb 22 pp 44-47. They are going to stop sending me the magazines and I’ll have to read on line so I won’t be reading them as much anymore due to too much time on the internet. I like to read my magazines at my own leisure away from the computer. According to this article 42% of American women have low libido or desire, pain and or elusive orgasms. Many more lack emotional connection with their partners. Issues such as body shame (Brown, 2012), negative conditioning and or lack of ability to relax is common. The clitoris is similar in size to a penis, with 95% below the surface (Aswell, 2018). There are half dozen types of orgasms to experience. Trauma may cause a body to feel desensitized or numb. Growing up, women may receive negative messages about their sexuality, bodies and desires which may cause lasting shame, confusion and guilt. Parts of the female anatomy need 20-40 minutes of attention, yet the average sex act is over in about six minutes (do you see a problem?). A great sex life needs priority and time. Sex with deep emotional connection is often the ultimate goal. What I usually suggest to women who have body shame is to look at themselves in a full length mirror and tell themselves they are beautiful. This is difficult and requires time. Do it every day if you feel shame, until you believe it. Communicate with your partner what it is you like once you find out what it is. Relationships require communication and listening. However, both need to be comfortable and nothing should ever be forced. Have a good weekend. Sex is important in a relationship——connection. What do you think?

My Sympathies to the Families and Survivors of the Mass shootings at Highland Park, Illinois

CNN reported that there have been 309 mass shooting across the U.S.A. this year alone. These tragic deaths and injuries causes so much grief and terror. Lives are forever changed. At this point I just want to say, Sorry. We should all be able to enjoy the holidays, feeling safe in our own countries.

The Internet Murders continues..........

Cory was in his office on Bay Street. He couldn’t stop thinking of the girl. What was his problem? Maybe his buddies were right. He needed a life. Cory thought that Corporate was not making him happy. He would tell his father today. He needed to do something more with his life. Cory walked down the hall and stood in front of the grand double doors. He walked inside without knocking. The older man sat at the desk, behind him a breathtaking view of the city. They were high enough to see the lake. “You should knock, Cory. I could have been with someone.” “Dad, I want to talk to you.” Cory’s father looked up at his beautiful son who showed so much promise. Already his son was making more money than he ever did at his age. Of course Cory did have it easier because of his own station in life; however he was smart and earned every bit he was making. “Sit down, son.” Cory sat on the designer sofa, made to impress rather than comfort. The entire room spelled luxury. It wasn’t really a room. It was the size of an entire apartment, bar and all. It also had a separate area, for a king size bed, where his father would sleep many nights. Cory was sure that his father always slept here alone, regardless of the size of his bed. Everything his father did was grand. His mistress was money. He was no longer happy making mere millions. Cory wondered if his father was ever really capable of loving anyone. He was sure that his father wanted Cory to join him to help maximize his empire. He knew that he didn’t trust anyone except for him and his mother. Cory wondered whether his father placed so much importance on money because of his humble beginnings. His mother was happy being host to everyone at a moment’s notice. She didn’t mind him being away because he seemed absent when he was home. When he did come home, he would spend most of his time in his home office, and many nights Cory would awaken to hear his father speaking to someone in China or Japan or someone in Europe during their own time zones. It was probably more relaxing when his father was at the office. He looked out at the view of the city. It was beautiful. He could see the CN Tower, which you could hardly see now from street level, because there was a new high-rise being built on every parking lot. The growth was exciting for his father, who profited by this expansion. “Dad, I want to leave the company.” Excerpt From: Silva Redigonda. “The Internet Murders.

Happy Canada Day (belated) and Happy Jul 4th

I spent the weekend quietly enjoying gardens, roses and pets. It is not too often that I get to spend such a tranquil weekend, but I did. Canada Day for me is enjoying my country and celebration in fun. It is a day when only positivity fits in. I spent two Jul 4th's in the States, one being my Happy place - Disney World. We are hitting a seventh wave in my city of the pandemic and so I am still careful and normally participate in outdoor activities where it is not busy. That is easier said than done. Most of my hideout places have been discovered and is slowly becoming busy as well. However, I still have a few spots. This was the first time that my pets did not get too anxious about the fireworks, mainly because it was raining and so the neighbourhood scaled it down. I wish you a healthy time. Thank you for reading my blogs. What are your thoughts?