Hallowe'en and bringing you up to date

The weekend is here once again. It has been a busy week. I had a full day education with one organization, a meeting with an association. Another meeting with a guest speaker today and of course I see my clients in the midst of all this. TGIF. I cannot believe Hallowe'en is here. Hey, I even managed to go out and buy a mini bottle of champagne to celebrate the American elections, but I will have to wait for next weekend to celebrate that with pizza, because I have an early, early morning Wednesday. Tomorrow is my first virtual Hallowe'en party celebration. I am not quite sure how it works, but I am game. It is with the Sisters of Crime. Men are members too and that is how I was introduced to the organization. My book is still suffering due to all the other work I am doing. However, it is all in my brain cells. Tomorrow night should prove interesting. I have been debating what to do with kid's who knock on my door. Aside from when I have been out of the country or working the night shift or going out trick or treating myself, I have never missed it. This year I did not decorate my house except for one table cloth runner which I bought in the States last year. The rest of my fun stuff is still in its storage waiting for next year. I debated about what to do. So, finally I decided that kids will still get their treats if they come around. I will put out a sign tomorrow (orange) and say that this year I am invisible and they are to help themselves. I shall put the chips and chocolate and they can take whatever they want. My neighbourhood is full of kids and they are so very cute. I just cannot stop myself, my bad. Please parents take the sanitizer with you, stay 6' apart and better still celebrate at home with popcorn, games, scary kid movies. However, I know that in my neighbourhood, they will still come out and I just cannot ignore that. I'll let you know how that goes next week. I have lots of information for you and I will make some time to get it out to you. Stay safe. Enjoy the holiday and make time for fun.

Acute discrimination and the Asian-white mental health gap during COVID -19 by Dr Wu (notes)

I attended this one hour session provided by Dr C. Wu, Associate Professor at York University’s Department of Sociology. He stated that before the pandemic there was a low level of harassment and threats in Canada and the U.S.A. This changed. He showed a slide of an Asian woman in Vancouver (I believe it was) being punched. There have been over 2500 anti-racism incidents in the States. In Canada - over 40% report more racism. What are the consequences? When people experience racism, it could lead to higher rates of mental incidents. In China Town (downtown Toronto) a middle aged woman at the Dragon Mall started swearing at a man, calling him “a fu——-g Chinese.” There has been 30 methods of data collected in the States. Longitudinal studies depict Asian Americans having a higher level of discrimination. There is a gap between white and Asian immigrants, over time - First wave in March there was a rise in discrimination and a huge increase in mental issues. Asian and white immigrants tend to be healthier (younger/healthier). During the 2nd wave there was a decline in gap. The findings were that Asian immigrants had an increase in mental health issues. In Canada there is a similar pattern. What can be done? Group - specific mental health interventions and support in response to COVID 19 pandemic. Health professionals play a key role in countering racism and its consequences. Ensure medicine as a field continues to care for all minority communities. We need to find a way to stop all this hatred. People are born here; belong here. The Chinese community is less likely to use mental health services. In Western society we are more open to it. When President Trump calls COVID 19, the Chinese Virus there is a spike in Asian mental issues each time. Research has shown that since the outbreak, there is prejudice against Asians. In data analysis only Asians show correlation to the pandemic. Historically the Chinese were discriminated against in the States and Canada. There are historical issues and now the pandemic has worsen it. This educational piece is on U-tube and Facebook. Any errors are my own. I have a virtual meeting and a one hour educational piece regarding couples in crises and brief therapy today. Monday I have an educational day with a Professor from the States regarding racism. Next Month I will be attending 8 hours at two hour intervals regarding Ignatian spirituality. I will be sharing with you as much as possible. If you ever have questions, I am more than happy to try to answer them. I am also working on a web site with Preet to list my books/ebooks on shopify. You will be able to order my books from all over the world. I am also starting a new online calender for new clients in my private clients. I am afraid I don’t have much room or openings but since I am paying for the service, I should be using it. Take care. Tomorrow is my day of rest. Talk soon.

How and when to deliver care in-person vs. virtually (notes) CAMH

Yesterday I attended an one hour education period with CAMH virtually. Tomorrow I have another hour with York University. I don’t want to fall behind too much and so what I have decided to do is to write my notes to you and keep a copy of that for myself, record my education hours on my resume and for my college and appropriate association and then I can carry on with the other stuff. So, as you know I have gone from in person at my home office to virtually or telephone. However, there are still times that I do see a person in my office. I went from an office that was comforting and warm to an office that is almost sterile. My books I donated to my old professor, a Jesuit. He is now in a retirement home and so I asked him to donate them to the library when he is finished. He has told me that to read all those books a person can get a fine education. I did not donate the books he wrote. I have only one shelf of books in my office right now and another in my other home office. I re-placed my comfy love seat with wooden/metal chairs which is easy to sanitize. I have cleaning supplies replacing cute ornaments on my filing cabinet. I have had one long term client in my home office and I could tell he does not like the changes. However, COVID has changed everything. Back to CAMH. The presenters were Sandra Easson-Bruno from North Simcoe Muskoka Specialized Geriatric Services and Dr Allison Crawford - CAMH, General Psychiatry and Health systems Division, Associate Chiefs. I am always honoured to be invited. There was discussion regarding how overdoses skyrocketed in April, May and June. I see people who suffer addiction as well as their partners and/or families. Sometimes one doesn’t think he or she has a problem but arrives because of an ultimatum. There are different stages which I have written about before so I won’t elaborate. However, there are times when one really wants to get help and there the work can begin. The one suffering the addictions is the one who needs to recognize that he or she needs the help. When it comes to virtual therapy the presenter stated there was an indication that some are less vocal and they might disengage from treatment. Loneliness can increase. There was concerns about the family environment virtually. There are eyes there. I have noticed that myself especially with children. They know their parents are listening and therefore children won’t open up. Others I see use the therapy virtual room as a way of letting others know what they are saying. It is easy to tell when they start whispering with something they don’t want to share. Yes there are eyes as the presenters reported and I have noticed. With my weekly discussions of self/client care this is one topic which has been shared as we all experience virtual therapy in our care for others (I have missed last week and will also miss this week due to seeing clients and more education). In person, when I see clients, they are free to speak. There is no one listening except me. No one is standing by the door. They are safe and free. Another issue raised regarding the elderly is the circumstances of virtual when there is confusion with an elderly person, or a fall. I do see elderly people in my office and not on line. Usually a family member will bring them in and I encourage the escort to return in 50 minutes. I tell them where the local bakery is. CAMH is having 7000 virtual visits a month. I have gone from seeing people 99 % in person and about 1% by telephone to 99% virtually and 1% in person or communicating via telephone. I do try to encourage virtual. However people I see can afford to see me, either because of their EAP, Insurance or ability to pay my fee. I have decided not to increase my fees this year due to COVID. The presenters talked about Virtual mental health and the client’s experience. What happens when they cannot afford a virtual device? How can they access a device? How about their ability to engage? They also talked about those having no access what so ever to technology, not being able to see or hear. They talked about social isolation being huge. However, they also talked about great virtual programs. One of the things they mentioned is how many organizations where people depended on are now closed. I have heard complaints about that especially from the families of seniors. They talked about guidelines for virtual groups. Overall, a lot was covered in an hour. So now I will post the hour in my education platforms. My own thinking has changed since using virtual. If you read one of my previous blogs where I posted a paper regarding the ethics of virtual therapy, you will notice how I examined the pros and cons of virtual vs in person. Because of COVID I have had to move quickly to continue the care of my clients. I also had to consider my own health risk. I am six feet away from my clients in person. There is a sanitizer bottle near me and one near my clients. However, I do prefer to see clients virtually. I had to find a platform to keep my clients as safe as possible and so there are more expenses incurred for that service. After COVID I will continue to see clients virtually, because it offers a platform to those who can’t visit me because of distance, travel etc….I have noticed that some clients no matter how sick they are still wanted to see me but after COVID, they can from the comfort of their homes. The session I had with CAMH also stated they would send us the slides which I will be grateful for since they have forms I would like to have my clients compile if they wish since they can compare their virtual experience to in- person. I want to know the pros and cons my clients feel about virtual vs in person. I already have knowledge of that from clients who share it immediately without asking. There are also the guidelines for group work. I already know how to do group therapy but have never done it virtually though I offered it during the pandemic to one senior’s group. There wasn’t access or know how of virtual use. There went my offering. It is the thought that counts. No? So, I understand the concerns for those dealing with seniors. If there is a big company out there or even people who no longer have use for their devices, please donate them to CAMH or other organization who can provide it to people who don’t have access to technology. That can mean so much for someone suffering in isolation. There was also a request for that from hospitals during the COVID madness when it started. Please reach out to an elderly person by phone to just say hi. I have seen so much sadness because of the pandemic, but I have also seen so much caring from our people in Toronto as well. So many have stepped up to help others. And that helping of others is also therapeutic. It has emotional health benefits. I have two more educational events this week. There is another one hour talk from York University regarding Acute Discrimination and the Asian - white mental health gap during COVID -19. I want to share that with you probably on Friday if I can. Saturday I will be attending a virtual meeting with Canadian Association of Family Therapy (I also have to start recording hours for them as well) and a session early evening/late afternoon regarding brief therapy for couples in crises. It is all good. One of the mentions in the talk from CAMH is the effect this is all having on service providers. As for myself, I took an entire month off this summer. I am also taking the time and money to beautify my outside space. I started this fall and will continue in the spring. I want to spend as much time outside as possible during our short summer. The summer disappeared so fast. Take care. Don’t forget to focus on self care. Talk soon.

Exodus continues Theology notes

Intent of God is to being everything in life. Book of Job can be presented as terrifying God. Love of adults can be very challenging. Job - example of brother in law - fight and then what is for supper? Sacrifice son - challenge to surrender. Biblical stories are meant to present as with our greatest desires and greatest fears; not meant to emulate. Child needs to face fears with good coming on top. Concentrate on two things. 1. Figure of Moses - What happens to Moses, happens to people. 2. Theme of resistance - of people, pharaohs. Pharaohs people and Moses resist. Unlike Abraham and who is already married with Sarah. Yes had a father - we enter his story as an adult with his birth which says something about birth of a people. The Sinai Covenant is the start of a people. They make a commitment; has a response as what God has done for them. They multiplied, threat/ Hebrew boys thrown into the Nile. Moses even though he grows up in Egypt, he has compassion and leadership both to protect. Moses flees to the desert which suggests Moses’ leadership is based on a call from God. Ywah is a none name. I am who I am. I will be what I will be. The Divine name is revealed. Name is not a name. Moses and Israel - out of water. Moses encounters burning bush in the desert and so to people in the desert - fire/storm. Volcanic eruption and storm and both come together in image of lightening. Let’s try to explore why Pharaohs resist. Why the phase, God hardens heart. God hardens Pharaoh’s heart. Two verbs being used 1. Strong heart and 2. heavy heart. Pharaoh’s heart is hardened not by God. What dominates is that Pharaoh’s heart is hard. While for God hardening is at the end of plaques. Interpreted that God is giving them a chance to change and greater plaques are sent. All have to do with life and death. Notice magicians - First blood in water - no remorse. Frogs - want them removed. He revealed the hardness of his heart. 3rd gnats - magicians, therefore this is from God. 5. Life stock, 6. boils - has sinned but takes it back. 7. I have sinned - I know you do not yet fear the Lord. 8 - Locusts - Adults, but not little ones. 10:17 Forgive my sin. 9th darkness - everyone but not flocks and herds. 10th - First born 12:31 rise up and go. Letting them grow. With each plague, depth of human resistance to life. Solomon later interprets the plaques as the mercy of God. Why ten plaques? Each step reveals 1. God’s powers, 2, hardness of heart. A plaque is meant to illicit conversion. It shows the hardness of heart. He revealed the hardness of heart. Temptation - better to be a slave than liberated (Exod 16:3). This address is the covenant of Abraham - rest in the promise. Sinai covenant - struggle every day. God is the one who accompanies over the river Jordon < Weight of emphasis on Israel by giving their amen. King gives grant to loyal servant. God - Abraham. God wants human to co-operate Sinai Covenant, not simple obedience. Resistant is what is what is happening in crossing of Red Sea - God is the one who did this. They had to stand still. There is still a task. Massa means testing. The events in the desert depicts their resistance. Think of how a parent shows more responsibility for making a decision. After flood - animals consumed without blood, to show respect of the animal. Genesis - prior - both animals and people ate vegetables. Blood represents blood of God. Genesis - Trinity - Let us. Write them scripture. Psalm 22. New Testament writers reaching back for contemporary society and who gave voice to what Jesus Christ experienced. Next for theology is Conquest Joshua 1-6, 24, Judges.

A Nurse and an Orderly fired in a Quebec hospital after an incident of hurling insults to a dying woman - an Aboriginal woman (cause for reflection)

I just posted a poem I read this morning from a newsletter of one of my Associations. I don’t think they will mind. The author is unknown. It is the blog just before this one. I watched the news where a woman lay dying but managed to get her phone to post a nurse telling her that she was stupid I believe it was and that she had made bad choices in her life. Before I became a therapist I thought I had heard and seen everything. I have not. I am consistently learning, discovering and concerned. As you know I have worked as an intern in a hospital as a Chaplain. I worked with HIV, Cancer and Palliative Care. Not because I am a saint, but because no one else wanted to and we were told we were needed by the ward. That is the sole reason. Someone should do it, but no one wanted to. There was no obligation to do anything we did not want (perhaps there should be. How else does one grow?). I saw a life time of suffering as people talked to me about their lives, their regrets, their pain, their ………..At times I would go home and just look out and immerse myself in nature. I would look at my beautiful flowers and greenery and just stare off. I was suffering. I was also working seven days a week for too long, cramming two units in, the other pastoral counselling - Colpa mia. During this pandemic I have moved my private practice on line from seeing clients in my office. It is rare that I do and only under certain circumstances. Whenever I have been with the dying, I have considered it a privilege. There have been times when there was no one for the person dying. God help me, if I had ever witnessed anyone demeaning a dying person. I was fortunate to see the most amazing doctors and nurses and other hospital staff care for those who could not care for themselves. Often a doctor or nurse would ask me to see someone who was suffering. I did - always. I have attended more lecture series on line which allows me to attend more than if I had to pick and choose if it was in person. I am a very social person so I will always give priority to live sessions in person. Suddenly because of the political environment there is a concern for the aboriginal, the poor and black lives. I say suddenly because I haven’t heard too much of anything before. What I do say to my clients is to take advantage of this opportunity when something is not right, when there is discrimination. In one of my last series from York University there was a talk about how the poor, aboriginal and blacks are more prone to get COVID 19. Did I learn anything? Of course not because it is the same thing over and over again. Nothing is done. I remember in undergrad studying how we polluted lakes where our native community live and depend on. Ok, so I learned that nothing has been done to rectify that. Why should be the question? At a two day lecture course I attended several years ago there were counsellors from a native community. None of them were qualified. So, perhaps last year I mentioned that to a politician and asked why? The answer was that it is hard to get qualified people to go to these isolated areas. Do I believe that? There are incentives and there are also possibilities for students working under supervision who would be more qualified. Why has this not been done? I admire this Aboriginal woman, a mother of seven who had the insight to tape what was happening. However, I also suffer that this woman was not respected by those whose job it is to do so. Being with someone who is dying is a privilege. There are certain careers where something more is required than doing your job, it is a vocation. One that should never be taken lightly. More education is to take place about caring in these institutions. There is blame and it is systemic. Now is the right time for change. Let’s abolish prejudice. Let’s recognize hate for what it is. Let’s not use bandage solutions but get down and dirty and clean up what needs to be done. Speak up when you see something is wrong. What do you think?

The Crabby Old woman (copied and pasted by one of the newsletters from one of my associations (not therapy)

THE CRABBY OLD WOMAN When an old woman died in the geriatric ward of a nursing home in Saskatchewan, it was believed that she had nothing left of any value. Later, when the nurses were going through her meager possessions, they found this poem. This little old woman, with nothing left to give to the world, is now the author of this beautiful anonymous poem. What do you see nurses? What do you see? What are you thinking when you're looking at me? A crabby old lady with faraway eyes? Who dribbles her food and makes no reply. Who seems not to notice the things that you do. And forever is losing a sock or shoe? Who, resisting or not, lets you do as you will, With bathing and feeding a long day to fill? Is that what you're thinking? Is that what you see? Then open your eyes, nurse, you're not looking at ... me I'll tell you who I am as I sit here so still, As I do at your bidding, as I eat at your will. A young girl of Sixteen with wings on her feet. And soon now a lover she'll meet. A bride soon at Twenty, my heart gives a leap. Remembering, the vows that I promised to keep At Twenty-Five, now I have young of my own. Who needs me to guide a secure happy home. At forty, my young sons have grown and are gone, But my man is beside me to see I don't mourn. At Fifty, once more, babies play 'round my knee, Again, we know children my husband and me Dark days are upon me; my husband's now dead. I look at the future and shudder with dread. For my young are all rearing young of their own. And I think of the years and the love that I've known. \ I'm now an old woman and nature is cruel. But inside this old carcass a young girl still dwells, And now and again my battered heart swells. I remember the joys I remember the pain. And I'm loving and living life over again. I think of the years, all too few gone too fast. And accept the stark fact that nothing can last. So open your eyes, people, open and see. Not a crabby old woman. Look closer... see ME!!